Christmas in Corsets
by unopeneddoors
Summary: There were two things James hated about Christmas. The first was being away from Lily Evans,and the other was his parents' stupid annual victorian costume party, but this year it was going to be very different and it all starts with a surprise guest...
1. The invitation

Christmas. There were two things James hated about Christmas. The first was being away from Lily Evans, the girl he had hopelessly chased for nearly six years, and the other was his parents' stupid annual costume party, and this year, it was going to be even worse. Normally Sirius would have been there to ease James' suffering, he lived with them after all, but this year he had decided to retreat to a skiing resort with his current girlfriend, leaving James all alone. Naturally James would have asked Remus to join him but his 'furry little problem' often got in the way of things and the costume party had been no exception. And so, James miserably grabbed his trunk from the baggage carriage after saying goodbye to the others and dragged it over to his parents with Sirius following close behind.

"Good term boys?" his father asked but James just mumbled something incoherent.

"Good..." his father replied absentmindedly, heaving James' trunk into a ministry car, "I'll drive you to Samantha's house tomorrow Sirius."

"Thanks Mr Potter," Sirius said angelically and James grinned, wondering what his father would really think of Sirius if he discovered what he was _**really**_ like. Suddenly James was scooped into a rib-crushing hug by his mother and he desperately tried to fight her off but to no avail.

"I've missed you sooooo much Jamesy..." She sighed as she began to rock him side to side. Mortified, James summoned up all of his strength and heaved his mother off of him, hoping that he had been quick enough to avoid being seen.

"It's only been a term mum!" He blushed, wanting desperately to elbow a giggling Sirius hard in the ribs. Sirius soon got his comeuppance however, when she scooped him into the same, vice-like squeeze, making him feel extremely awkward.

"Well boys I think we better go..." James' father said whilst his wife let go of a now red-faced Sirius, "We still have to organize the bartending staff for next week."

"Excellent," James muttered sarcastically as both he and Sirius clambered into the back of the ministry car.

"Oi Prongs," Sirius muttered and James turned to face him, "Better get your last dosage of Evans while you can..." Sirius grinned and pointed through James' window and, with a somewhat heavy heart James sighed hopelessly, turning to gaze at the stubborn redhead through the glass. Of all days, today had been the day that she had decided to thread red ribbon into her plaited hair. He couldn't blame her for doing it of course; it was rather near the festive season, although he couldn't help but hope that she had done it purposely, knowing how fond he was of it. James sighed with his forehead pressed against the glass wishing that just for a second she'd look at him without scowling. He'd do anything to knot his fingers in to her beautiful thick red locks, to press his lips against hers, even to hold her just for a moment...

"James, are you listening?" James' mother asked, sounding a little annoyed.

"What?" James said, snapping out of his thoughts, slightly reluctant to take his eyes off of Lily.

"I said are you sure that you have everything?"

"Yeah...yeah; I checked twice..." James dismissed and turned his gaze back to Lily who at this moment in time had been reunited with her parents. James watched with an absentminded smile on his face as she embraced both of her parents and his brow furrowed when her sister remained frigid at Lily's attempt to hug her. Lily never really mentioned her sister, but then again it was highly unlikely she would talk to him about her anyway...even if he would have listened to her with genuine interest; he'd do anything to show her that he wasn't that cocky brat he used to be.

"Prongs mate I think you might actually be starting to drool..." Sirius teased.

"I am not!" James protested quietly so as his parents couldn't hear, "I just want to get my three weeks in while I can; I think I might go crazy if I don't..."

"You really are screwed aren't you?" Sirius said sympathetically.

"Well it's alright for you!" James protested, "You always get the girl you want and you're even spending Christmas with her!"  
"That's because I don't tend to go for girls who hate me," Sirius said bluntly, "Honestly mate, have you never fancied anyone else?"

"No, and I don't want to," James shrugged, turning to watch Lily step into her own car, "She's perfect." Sirius rolled his eyes and stared out of his own window because, let's face it, there was no changing his mind after six years.

***

James dragged his trunk up the stairs and let it drop heavily at the bottom of his bed before throwing himself onto the mattress.

"I can't believe you're making me live through this alone..." James groaned as Sirius entered the room shortly after him, dragging his own trunk, "I'm going to be stuck in a house full of old people dressed in tight, highly unattractive Victorian outfits drowning themselves in fire whisky..."

"Oh I dunno..." Sirius grinned, "Drunken OAP's in corsets sounds like a spectacular night!" James frowned and threw a pillow at his friend who caught it easily, much to his annoyance.

"Git," James muttered before collapsing onto the mattress again.

"Speaking of gits, you looked like a right twonk in the car earlier," Sirius said quietly although James could hear the smile in his voice, "I think your parents have sussed out that you have the hots for Evans."

"Was it really that obvious?" James sighed.

"Painfully," Sirius grinned and it annoyed James that he was finding this fun.

"Well have fun prancing around in the snow with your future parent in laws wont you?" James jabbed and Sirius swallowed as he unpacked his trunk.

"It's not_** that**_ serious between me and Sam..." he said quietly, although he sounded anxious none the less.

"Well you keep telling yourself that mate if it makes you feel better," James smirked now that he was the one having fun teasing, "One minute you're flirting, then you're snogging and the next thing you know, you're spending Christmas with the family having the 'if you dare hurt my daughter' talk with her father over Christmas dinner." Sirius froze and ceased unpacking before he turned to look at James with wide eyes.

"Do you think I should think of an excuse not to go?" He asked, deadly serious and James tried to stare back as seriously as he could but he couldn't help it and burst out laughing.

"I knew it!" He said through the laughter, "You're worried about going aren't you?"

"No!"  
"Liar!" James grinned, "You're worried that this could actually be your first serious relationship!"  
"Am not!" Sirius argued but he looked flushed, "It's not serious at all! It's just a bit of fun..."  
"So... spending Christmas with her family is just for a laugh is it?"

"I...yes! I mean...I don't want it to be serious..." Sirius said quietly and James felt all the light-heartedness of the situation disparate. There was an awkward pause as Sirius resumed unpacking at a rather flustered pace and James scrutinized his friend.

"You really like her don't you?" James concluded, "You like her but you don't want to because you're scared; it's just not what Sirius Black does..." Sirius' pace slowed dramatically and James took that as a confirmation. James sighed; of all the people he could have had this sort of pep talk with he never thought he'd be giving it to Sirius 'the lady killer'.

"Padfoot mate, don't w-"  
"James!"  
_**Oh perfect timing mum...**_

"Yeah?" James called, beginning to lose patience with his mother's impeccable skill to pick the worst possible moments to interrupt.

"Can you and Sirius start making a list of the guests who've confirmed that their coming next week?"

"But we...yeah..." James sighed, realising that there was no point in arguing and when he looked at his friend once more, Sirius had stopped unpacking altogether, leaning against his bed, facing James.

"We'd better go help," Sirius said before James had a chance to continue the conversation and the two headed downstairs and into the kitchen where piles of envelopes awaited them. James picked up the nearest envelope and read the front, instantly recognising his father's delicate handwriting in gold ink.

_**Rose Marshall**_

James groaned internally; Rose Marshall had always had a bit of a thing for him and, in the politest way of putting it, she was bloody annoying. For the past few years James had been lucky enough to miss her due to the fact that she had spent Christmas with her friends, apparently she had made sure that she could make it this year.

"Sirius the situation just got ten times worse..." James groaned showing Sirius the envelope and an impish grin spread across Sirius' face.

"Oh I do wish I wasn't missing this party," Sirius sighed and James picked up another envelope at random.

_**Let's see who else I'm going to have to endure this year...**_

James picked another envelope from the pile, sending a dozen cascading all over the floor. Rolling his eyes, James dropped to his knees and began to pick them up again only to freeze as soon as he lifted a handful from beneath him. He slammed the others down by his side and slowly reached out to grab the envelope in front of him, scrutinizing every swirl and curve of his father's handwriting. He read it over and over again just to be sure that the name scrolled across the envelope wasn't an illusion, a misprint, something he had read incorrectly, anything but reality. It just wasn't logical, it couldn't be...

_**Lily Evans**_

Author's note: ok so this is a new story idea that popped into my head one night when I was watching a period drama and just thought, wouldn't it be great if Lily and James' story was told in those times Like Mr Darcy and Eliza Bennet? And so I thought I's take it from a different angle and have James' parents throw an annual costume party XD PLEASE REVIEW and let me know what you think so far :P


	2. Woes

"Oh I really do wish I could watch this whole episode unfurl," Sirius grinned as James yanked off his shirt, "How are you going to be able to control yourself when she turns up on one of those tight, boob enlarging dresses? I don't even think_** I**_ could help myself from trying it on with her with all _**that **_in my face...." James glared in his friend's direction but Sirius just grinned back at him.

"That's precisely what I'm worried about, I mean, what if someone makes a move on her or what if she brings a date?" James mumbled, "I think I might have to punch the bloke."  
"Oh I definitely wish I was staying now," Sirius chuckled.

"Sirius!" James moaned, swivelling round to face him, "I'm being serious! If she brings some guy with her I don't think I could just sit back and watch and if I did do something about it, she'd hate me more than she already does!"

"Oh I dunno," Sirius grinned, "She might think you're her knight in shining armour."  
"Don't joke Sirius," James moaned, "You know how fragile I am when it comes to Evans." Sirius rolled his eyes.  
"Well I personally think she won't," Sirius shrugged, "I mean, who would she bring?"  
"Well how do we know that she doesn't have some secret muggle boyfriend or something?"

"Oh she wouldn't bring a muggle," Sirius dismissed, "He wouldn't know anything about magic and she'd be breaking the rules by revealing it."

"Even so, she might have met someone in Diagon Alley or something..."

"And how many times do you reckon muggle-born Lily Evans would make it to Diagon Alley, James?"

"Well she must go to get stuff for school. Pretty girls always get asked for their details Sirius; it doesn't matter how long they've been there. You should know that."  
"Why? Do you think I'm pretty?" Sirius asked batting his eyelashes and James rolled his eyes at the terrible joke, "Look mate, Evans won't bring a bloke to the party, and even if she does then she's not worth it because it would mean that she's purposely trying to hurt you."

"It would still make me feel like crap though, whether or not she's worth it," James moaned.

"Boys are you ready yet?" James' father called up the stairs, "Samantha's parents are waiting!"

"We're coming!" James called throwing on a new shirt, "Come on, let's whisk you off to paradise with your fiancé."

"Shut up..." Sirius grumbled and both the boys dragged suitcases out of James' bedroom and over to the ministry car.

"Merlin Sirius how much did you wanna bring?" James laughed as he heaved Sirius's suitcases into the boot.

"It's the price you pay to look this good," Sirius grinned, throwing his own load into the back of the car, "When you decide to lose those geeky specks and sort your hair out I'll be there with all the right stuff to make you look like a God."

"Oh Merlin, why aren't you staying? I need you for next week!"

"Are you ready Sirius? We really need to get going," came the voice of James' father and the boys shared a swift manly hug.

"Try not to get Sam pregnant Sirius," James mumbled so as his father couldn't hear, "You can't fool me; I know what you're plannong to do on your holiday. Your suitcases are chock full of condoms, that's why you need so many."

"You know me too well, shame the same can't be said for you...but then again tight Victorian trousers might show-"  
"Bye Sirius," James grinned, shoving his friend into the front seat of the car next to his father. Sirius grinned too and closed the car door, causing James to back away so that the car could pull out.

He stood at the end of the drive, watching as his friend embarked on his own adventure and he secretly crossed every part of his body; when would Sirius ever feel that serious about a girl again? It was then that James thought about Lily Evans with her green eyes and the red ribbon in her hair, and he wondered whether or not it really would be a good thing for Sirius to feel about Sam the same way he did about Lily.

***

When Lily Evans exited Kings Cross Station on the last day of school, she never expected to be handed an envelope with elegant gold script printed across the front by her father. She stared blankly at the envelope before eventually deciding to open it, plucking a stray strand of the ribbon in her hair as she did so.

"Who are the Potters?" Lily asked stupidly, surely John and Mary Potter weren't James Potter's parents? No, they couldn't be, how would her parents possibly know who they were? They were muggles and his parents were wizards.

"John and I used to be good friends when we were kids before we left for different schools; it was only last term when your mother and I braved passing through the barrier that we were reunited and I discovered that he was in fact a wizard. I got quite a shock the following day when an owl swooped in through the kitchen window with a letter attached to his leg. You know I swear his son's in your year....James was it? Do you know a James Potter, Lily?"  
Lily's heart sank. Oh yes, she knew James Potter. Trust her parents to have a secret connection to Mr Popular James Potter; the boy that just wouldn't leave her alone, the bully, the one boy she loathed.

"Yeah he's in my house," She said as naturally as she could and that was all she was going to say on the matter, "Shame we're going to Aunt Josephine's..."

"We're not," Petunia spat, clearly as unimpressed with the invite as Lily was, "She cancelled because Uncle Phil decided to take her on a surprise trip."

"What?" Lily said, now things were getting ugly, "So we're going?"

"Well I don't see why not; I haven't seen John in years, it would be great to catch up."

"Besides we've always wanted to meet other witches and wizards," Lily's mum piped up, "I can't help but feel that we don't really know much about what's going on in your life sweetie."

"Trust me, you don't want to know," Lily mumbled miserably as the image of James Potter and Severus popped into her mind. Deciding to push the image from her mind, Lily turned her attention to her sister who lounged in the seat next to her staring miserably out of the car window with her arms folded.

"How's school Tuney?" She tried but Petunia did not answer her. Lily sighed and muttered _**silencio **_under her breath; she didn't want her parents to hear her pleading with her sister to speak to her.

"Tuney please speak to me," Lily cried and Petunia's eyes widened when her parents appeared not to have heard anything, "You can't hate me forever; it's not my fault that you're not-"

"What did you do?" She asked, rounding on her sister, stopping her before she could continue; their parents didn't know of their break up, they would have asked questions by now, "Did you do something to them?"

"They can't hear us," Lily said brushing it aside but her heart sank when she saw the anger in her sister's eyes, "Don't worry it doesn't hurt them!"  
"Fix it," She spat, "Stop what you're doing and fix their hearing!"  
"There's nothing wrong with their-"  
"Lily just do it!" Petunia yelled, "I always knew you'd use it against me!"  
"What?" Lily whispered feeling the cracks in her heart spreading, "Tuney you're being ridiculous and paranoid!"

"You and your freakish powers!" Petunia spat, "You're going to ruin my life I know it! You're doing it now; you could keep me stuck like this forever! People will never be able to hear me again! Stop it! Let them hear me!"

"Tuney they can't hear me either; it's not just you!"  
"LILY STOP IT!"

"We need to talk Tuney!"  
"I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!"

"Tuney please!"  
"I HATE YOU LILY! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! HAPPY?" Petunia yelled, "I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU AND I DONT WANT GO PLAY DRESS UP WITH YOU AND YOUR FREAKISH FRIENDS AT THAT PARTY. I'M GOING AWAY WITH VERNON FOR CHRISTMAS. I'M SPENDING CHRISTMAS WITH NORMAL PEOPLE. AND WHEN I COME BACK HOPEFULLY YOU'LL BE BACK IN THAT MAD HOUSE WHERE YOU BELONG! NOW STOP IT!" Lily stared blankly at her sister and for the first time she didn't feel sorry for her, she didn't wish that her sister had gotten her wish and that Dumbledore had accepted her letter into Hogwarts; instead she felt anger.

"But you wish you were a _**'freak'**_ don't you Petunia," Lily said shaking; it wasn't a question, "You want to be in the _**'mad house'**_ don't you? You hate me because I have something that you don't, something that you want and you can't have it."

"How dare you! You and that greasy-"  
"Oh I know reading that letter was wrong, in fact, everything that boy did was wrong," Lily said feeling the pain spilling from her eyes; first Severus and now her sister, who else would she lose?

"I know that I shouldn't have let him take it, that I shouldn't have let him read it, but because I did, I know exactly why you hate me Tuney. You're jealous and you're pathetic." Petunia stared at her sister as if each of her words were venom and with a flick of her wand, Lily burst the bubble of silence that had surrounded them, forcing her sister to swallow her retaliation in front of her parents. Lily hastily wiped the tears from her eyes; now she was being pathetic, she was much too stubborn to let her sister make her cry.

"You girls are awfully quiet..." Their father said staring into the rear-view mirror, "Everything ok back there?"

"Fine," the sisters said in union.

_**Authors note: Ok so I'm thinking that this was a little rushed but I want to skip all this intro business and get to the juicy bits that hopefully everyone will like :P please review as always! XD xxx**_


	3. Malkin's Masterpiece

_**I can't believe I'm actually going to do this...**_

Lily sighed and stepped into _Madam Malkin's Robe's for All Occasions _shortly followed by her slightly anxious parents. It hadn't occurred to Lily or her parents until the last minute that Victorian Wizard outfits may have been different to their own, after all they dressed differently today why wouldn't they have back then? Although, to be perfectly honest, knowing that this was Potter's party she couldn't care less if she turned up in a potato sack; anything to stop those wandering eyes and boyish grins that infuriated her so.

As soon as the shop door opened, there was a faint tinkling as the small bell above them summoned the short, thin witch that was madam Malkin. As always her thick framed glasses were perched on the end of her pointed nose and a measuring tape that extended of its own accord to suit the customer was draped over her shoulders; Lily could only imagine who demanded her expertise when the students were in school...it must have been a very handy measuring tape indeed.

"Good afternoon," The dressmaker said, eyeing what Lily could imagine were her parents peculiar outfits, but then there had been many muggle-borns accepted into Hogwarts, clearly this hadn't been the first time she'd seen any of the sort, "How can I help you?" Feeling the need to speak for her slightly bashful parents Lily decided to take the reins.

"We're going to a Christmas party with a Victorian theme but we don't really know much about how witches and wizards dressed back then," Lily said as Madam Malkin's eyes gleamed with the prospect of moneymaking from naive muggles, "Do you think you could...sort us out?"

"My dear, when I say 'robes for all occasions I mean it'" She smiled, hurrying to the back of the shop behind a heavy velvet curtain. Lily turned and smiled at her parents; it felt odd having to look out for them when she was so used to it being the other way around; she wasn't about to let Malkin con them out of their money for not knowing the wizard to muggle exchange rate.

"Unusual place isn't it?" Lily's father smiled, "I'm sure Petunia would have found it interesting."

_**Yeah I bet... **_

"Mmm..." Lily smiled, "Bet she's having fun though." This wasn't a lie; Lily suspected that her sister was overjoyed being away from the 'freak' for Christmas. Lily's mother smiled and braved reaching out to touch an abandoned patch of fabric but flinched when it rippled like water at her touch. Within an instant, Madam Malkin reappeared from behind the curtain and rushed forwards, pausing for a second to glance at Lily's mother.

"Pale or Pastel for you I think, dear," She said before she clasped her bony hand around Lily's wrist and tugged hard.

"You first dear," She smiled, "Something to compliment your pale complexion I think...perhaps to flatter your pretty hair..." Lily smiled back and followed her behind the velvet, leaving her parents to browse. Malkin was known for her flattery; it was a 'foolproof' way to make a good sale, but even though Lily could see through her false persona, she couldn't help but envy her skill and adore her art. She'd buy with or without the flattery.

Madam Malkin removed the magic measuring tape from around her shoulders and flicked her wrist as if it were a whip; within an instant the yellow plastic extended and wrapped around Lily's waist whilst a hovering 'quick quotes quill' and notepad followed the seamstress and jotted down her measurements.

"Arms out my love," Malkin demanded and Lily flung her arms out like a bird, allowing the tape to measure them. The dressmaker jerked her arm back and the tape retracted before she threw it around her shoulders once more.

"May I say my dear that you have a figure any woman would be jealous of," She smiled before heading over to the varied cloths, "I have a feeling this will be a very pretty piece knowing the model has her curves in all the right places."

"Thanks," Lily smiled, folding her arms feeling slightly embarrassed; Malkin sure knew how to milk it.

"Now my dear I was thinking of a red to compliment your skin tone but I'm afraid your hair colour wouldn't get all the attention it deserves..." She said over her shoulder, pulling out a dark purple fabric before holding up to Lily's torso, "I was thinking of giving you a cream or a white but I'm sure your mother would suit it best and we can't have you turning up in the same colour now can we? Now I must say dear this colour suits you very well but it's not at all festive is it? No, I think we're going to have to think of something else." Not quite sure of what to say, Lily didn't reply but let Madam Malkin mull it over in her head whilst her eyes caught some rather unusual fabrics, one of which moved of its own accord and sounded like the waves of the sea, the ends of the bluish-green turning white as if they were foaming.

"Got it!"

Lily turned her attention back to the seamstress who was holding a rather beautiful emerald green fabric; although it looked heavy it flowed when she spun towards Lily with a large grin on her face.

"I think with a little black lace, a few ruffles..."

Lily watched in amusement as Madam Malkin paced around her with the cloth in her hands, considering every dress pattern, every design to make her as much money and good reputation as possible. With a smile, Madam Malkin removed the pins from her hair and sat down to work. With a wave of her wand she brought several reels of thread and packs of needles to life in order to bring her creation to reality.

"It was your eyes that inspired me my dear it really was; they're such a pretty colour, it's a shame that only a small part of you should be that colour. Mind you, I did see a woman that had a jealousy charm backfire and green can be such a sickly colour if your skin takes to it. Green eyes and green skin would be far too much now wouldn't it?"

Lily just smiled and nodded as the witch continued to ramble on about the colour green, measuring and cutting here and there whilst her needles and thread sewed close behind her.

"So erm...how much is all this going to cost?" Lily asked, "For all of it."  
"Depends on the material for the others love," Malkin shrugged, "I presume you're the witch in the family?"

"Yeah," Lily nodded.

"Friend of James Potter then are you?"  
_**How is it that everybody knows James Potter?**_

"Erm...no not really," Lily said, "We're in the same year but our fathers were friends before Mr Potter left for Hogwarts."  
"Ahh...it is fortunate then that you were to become a witch."

"Sorry?"  
"Well I presume John Potter wouldn't have been able stay friends with a muggle if he couldn't talk about his magic; when you put two and two together it's clear that you becoming a witch and exposing our world to your parents has brought the old friends together."

"Mmm I suppose," Lily smiled to herself.

"Lovely people the Potters; they bring me good business with their annual costume party. I thought with you not being one of the usuals you and James would have been an item."

_**He wishes...**_

"Not quite," Lily smiled politely.

" 'Spose it's for the best if Rose Marshall is to attend," Malkin said with a hint of a giggle.

"Sorry I don't know a Rose Marshall," Lily said, as she prodded a glowing fabric that burst into thousands of gold flecks at the touch of her skin before remoulding back into shape.

"Bubbly girl, full of spirit although she can be a bit of a nuisance; she's obsessed with the boy."

"Oh really?" Lily smirked raising an eyebrow; it sounded like James Potter had his own annoying James Potter to follow him around and ask him out every day.

"He's clearly not interested though. Shame; she's a pretty girl." Finally Madame Malkin stood with the green dress in her hands and Lily smiled, reaching out to touch it; it was beautiful.

"It's not done yet!" The seamstress yelped pulling it out of her reach, "This is only the basic shape! I still need to sew the lace and a few bows here and there. Only sophisticated witches went to balls so we need to make you gorgeous now don't we?"

"Oh..." Lily said stupidly as the dressmaker brushed past her towards another desk laden with sequins, flecks of silver and gold, lace, bows, ribbons and all sorts of decorative things.

"Any preference to the detail?" Malkin asked neatly spreading the pile of bows into a line and Lily's brow furrowed a little.

"Not too much; I think it's beautiful already. I wouldn't want too much on it; it might ruin it." Malkin nodded and smiled as she began to sew a bow to each sleeve with long dangling tails of ribbon. Next she picked up a roll of black lace and another of black ribbon and began to sew it along the bottom of the ruffles, highlighting each layer of the dress.

"Perfect," the seamstress smiled, adjusting the glasses on the end of her nose, "Now my dear we need to find you a corset."  
"Oh...I was just thinking of wearing a strapless-"  
"Nonsense! A corset is traditional, not only that but the torso of a Victorian dress is a tight fit; a bra will have an outline and that just wouldn't do." Malkin stood, throwing the dress over her arm, "I have some pre-made, all we have to do is get you to try it on and adjust it a little." With a wave of her wand a screen appeared out on nowhere and Madam Malkin handed Lily the dress and a corset that she stole from a nearby mannequin.

"Try it on," She smiled, "I'm going to fetch your mother; it's her turn." Lily nodded and stepped behind the screen to discover that the back of it were three large mirrors all joined together so that she could see every angle of herself. Stripping off she held the corset out in front of her, extremely confused as to how to wear it and decided to wait for Madam Malkin to return with her mother.

"How are we getting on?" she said as Lily managed to clasp the front shut.

"Erm...could you....uh...help me with the back?" She asked and the seamstress appeared from behind the screen. Lily turned and lifted her hair.

"Right let me teach you how to do this so that you can do it on the night," She said, "First off loosen the corset you your natural waist size, for example if your waist is thirty-four inches, loosen it to thirty-four inches. Then do the clasps at the front from top to bottom; you've done that. Right now, hook your thumb onto the top set of criss crossed laces, pull slowly and evenly until you reach your desired tightness. Do not let go until you start to pull the next set of laces. Right now, with your other thumb hook it onto the second set of laces from the top and pull.  
See how I've taken the slack out of the first set of laces? Now continue doing this with each set of laces working your way down to your waist where the "pull loops" are which are these middle ones here. Yes that's right." Madame Malkin scrutinized Lily closely as she followed her instructions, all the while struggling to see how she would remember all of this on the night.

"Right now that you've reached the Pull Loops, to get out any remaining slack in the top rows of laces, pull the TOP part of the pull loops evenly and slowly. Right when there's no looseness anymore, pull the Pull Loops out all the way until you get a nice small waist. Yes that's right. Right now do the same with the bottom half as you did before only when you've reached the bottom pull the bottom of the Pull Loops evenly and slowly until it's as tight as you want it. Then cross over the Pull Loops to make your waist even smaller, bring them round the front and tie them in a knot...and that's it!"

"Great," Lily sighed, glad that there were no more steps and partly because her breathing was limited. Throwing the dress over her head, Lily felt Madam Malkin pull gently on the bottom and smiled when she finally saw herself in the mirror; the dress was stunning.

"It's beautiful," Lily smiled, twirling a little.

"Show me!" Came her mother's voice and Lily stepped out from behind the screen to curtsey at her.

"Oh! Where's your father!" Lily's mother said excitedly and Lily rolled her eyes as she hurried off to summon her husband. When she came back dragging him behind her at arm's length, Lily's father smiled and stepped forwards to embrace Lily.  
"Wow Lily, is that you?" He beamed.

"Real original dad," Lily said shaking her head.

"You'll be fighting them off!"

Lily's eyes widened at the thought of James Potter.

_**Oh no...Is it possible to get a re-design and go as a man? **_

_**Authors note: Ok so, Lily's dress. In case you wanted a visual, I'm sorry but I don't know how to post links in here so its**_

Google images  
type in Victorian ball gown  
go to page 3  
and its second to last in the bottom right hand corner called victorian in blue-if you're reading this way after I've written this chapter sorry if its changed and moves somewhere else :(**_  
_**

_**That's is pretty much what her dress looks like in my head apart from the fact that it's green and it doesn't have the red bits on the sleeves or in the middle bit. I wanted it to be simple but pretty because I don't really think Lily's the type of girl that would want a dress that makes her the **__**centre of attention. Oh and sorry if I rambled on about the corset; I've always wanted to know how to do it and thought some of you might be interested too so I thought I'd stick it in. Anyway enough about me rambling on about dresses : ) Please review as always and thanks for reading! :P xxx**_


	4. Mr Perfect

James sat in the living room twirling a white candle between his fingers as he mulled over the conversation he had just had with Madam Malkin. So Lily was coming, he knew that much and that alone made his heart race with excitement; he had been certain that the only way Lily would ever come to his house was if she was cursed or dragged kicking and screaming.

"James, would you _**please**_ wake up?" James' mother complained but her voice was just a distant murmur from James' train of thought.

"Hmmm wha?" He said and the candle fell from his grip, rolling across the table.

"What's wrong with you today?" James' mother huffed, "You're not normally this distant."  
"Sorry," James mumbled, picking the candle up off of the floor and heading over to one of the many Christmas trees littered around the house.

"Is it because Sirius isn't here?"

"What? No, I'm just-"

"I suppose it will be a little boring for you, sweetie, but I think it's rather adorable that Sirius and his girlfriend are spending-"

Suddenly his mother gasped and a large grin spread across her face.

"Is it because a girl's coming?" She asked.

"What?" James said innocently, "Plenty of girls have come before."  
"None your age," His mother beamed, "That's it isn't it? My little Jamesey's all loved up!"

"Mum!" James groaned, "Please don't be embarrassing and go spreading that around!"

"So it's true then!" She giggled, "Now let's see, who can it be...?

"I didn't say it was true," James said casually, "I'm just asking you not to be so embarrassing."

"Kiki Figgle!" James' mother yelled as though she'd just had a revelation, "No she's in her twenties...although to be honest that's not much of an age gap..."

"Kiki Figgle?" James laughed, "Mum the girl's half troll; she's twice the size of me!"

"James, don't talk about her as if being half troll is a crime...although she did break Sirius' rib when she took a fancy to him two years back. Now let's see who else...Sue...no she's not coming...Tilly...oh she's married now isn't she? Oh while we're on this subject, your cousin broke up with his girlfriend two months ago so try and be nice-"

"Mum there's no point in you even trying to...wait, what?" James said, eyes wide, "Eli's coming?"

"Rose Marshall!" James' mother squealed, "It's Rose Marshall isn't it? I can tell by the way you're day dreaming and making sure that your costume is extra nice this year-"  
"Why is he coming?" James demanded, "He never comes, why now?"

"Don't try and change the subject Jamesey. That's why you're away with the fairies, she's always missed it hasn't she? And now she's finally coming and you're getting all excited! It's about time you gave into that girl; she's been chasing you for years."

"Mum will you forget about Rose Marshall?" James said, now extremely annoyed, "You know Eli and I don't get along."

"No James that's just you," She said rolling her eyes, "Eli adores you; I don't know what your problem is."

"He has to beat me at everything!" James yelled, "Everything I do he's either done it first or done it better."

"Jealousy is not a pretty shade of green James; I think you best wear another colour,"

"I'm not jealous! He's the competitive one; I'm happy with what I do, I just hate that spiteful tone he uses when he tells me what he's done, or the fact that he thinks I care."

"Well I always found him to be quite a modest young man," James' mother shrugged, "Your aunt tells me everything; he's never breathed a word and blushes like mad whenever she does."

"Anyone can blush on demand mum; just hold your breath," James spat levitating the candle onto the Christmas tree.

"James honey don't worry," His mother said sympathetically, "Rose has been after you for years; I don't think Eli's her type, he won't steal her from you."

"Mum, I'm not interested in Rose Marshall! I don't care if he-"Suddenly James stopped; he hadn't thought of that. Eli was the competitive type; if he found out how James felt about Lily he would most definitely compete to see who could win her over first.

"Ok it's true," James said, thinking fast, "I've always liked Rose but I was in denial. After she decided to go to Beauxbatons and went somewhere else every holiday I missed her and I wish that I hadn't been so stubborn. Now she's coming and I just want everything to be perfect, ok?"

"OH JAMESEY!" His mother cried and threw her arms around him, "This is so adorable! I knew your half hearted letters and incredibly short phone calls were proof that you're far too shy for your own good. I always told her that you fancied her really, that all she had to do was get it out of you."  
"You said what!?" James gasped.

"Oh don't pretend that I haven't done you a favour James," She said, finally letting go of him, "Now, let's get everything sorted, your cousin will be here soon."  
James watched in disbelief as she hurried out of the room. No wonder Rose had been chasing him for years; his own mother was the culprit!

"Unbelievable!" James muttered as he levitated a shimmering star on top of the tree. A small porcelain fairy danced towards the end of one of the branches and James' hand flew out just in time to catch her before she smashed on the ground below.

"Are you deliberately trying to cause trouble?" he asked her and gently placed her back on the branch, watching as she giggled and danced happily away.

"Women,"

With a wave of his wand, James lit the Christmas tree and stood back to admire his work.

"Twenty-fifth one down," James groaned and turned just as the door chimed, "Great." James pondered on escaping to his room but he knew his mother would scorn him for it, so, reluctantly; he went to greet his cousin at the door. Eli Potter stood in the doorway with snow in his tousled dark brown hair, his eyes a brilliant blue; another thing he beat James at...the boy looked like a supermodel. There were no 'dorky' glasses for Eli Potter; in fact, he had perfect eyesight.

"Hi!" Eli beamed; an act for his aunt no doubt who swooped him into a bear hug.

"How's your mother?" She enquired, "I haven't seen my sister in months!"

"Yeah she and dad are good. They're still visiting my dad's relatives but they'll be here tomorrow for the party."

"Oh good. How's school been?" She asked and Eli's grin spread.

"It's different, being in another country but not everyone gets accepted so I'm grateful," He smirked, his eyes focusing on James.

_**Here we go...**_

"I couldn't do it personally," James retaliated, "Being miles and miles away from your family; I like coming home."

"Is that why you never applied?" Eli asked innocently; another jab insinuating that James simply wasn't good enough.

"Yep," James said casually, "I'm a family man."

"Just like his father," James' mother beamed, clearly oblivious to the tension, "Speaking of which, I'm going to go help him decorate the dining room; James will help you out with your stuff Eli."

"Thanks Aunt Mary," Eli said politely as she departed before turning to James and James almost retched, "James." It was a polite greeting but not one typical of a relative.

"Eli," James nodded.

"Still Gryffindor seeker?" Eli asked.

"Yes," James said curtly.

"We should play," He suggested, "Although it would clearly be an unfair match, after all the Westgate Winged Horses have players for the England team in the world cup."

"I suppose you're aiming for that next," James said, ignoring another jab. Eli nodded.

"Say, didn't _**you**_ want to play for England one day?" He asked.

"I thought about it once," James replied coolly, "But then I decided that being an auror was a much nobler job than a seeker."

"Did you know I've been recommended for the undergraduate auror programme?" Eli asked innocently.

"I do now," James replied coldly, "Eli, why don't you let me take your stuff upstairs? It's better than the both of us trudging up there." Eli flashed James a false smile and handed him his suitcase.

"Good idea," He smirked and left James in the hallway.

_**Great...he's even got me volunteering to be his slave. **_

_**Authors' note: OK so this was the last chapter before the party starts and the fun begins which is why I can hopefully get away with it being a little short XD Thanks for reading and please review as always. I'll post as soon as I can :P**_


	5. The Reunion

"Why don't you just wear a hat?"  
"I'm not wearing a hat mum."  
"Well do something with your hair then!"  
"I can't do anything with my hair! It's been like this since birth!"

"You could at least _**try **_to make it look neater."  
"We've both tried and failed, face it; my hair is naturally messy and it's not going to change!" James yelled as his mother fussed over his messy matt of hair, hastily bending out of reach, "Just leave it!"

"Fine," his mother huffed, "If you want to embarrass your parents in front of people you haven't seen all year or even longer, then fine; people will think you've never been groomed!"

"Mum, you and everyone else knows messy hair is part of the Potter genes; I don't think they care"

"It doesn't hurt to take pride in your appearance James," His mother scowled, "Is it because Rose likes it like that?"

"Fine..." James sighed, rolling his eyes when he turned away; it was the only way he was getting out of it, "Rose like's it messy alright?"

"Rose?" Came a voice from the doorway and James couldn't help but smile mischievously, "Rose Marshall?" James went stiff, pretending to be shocked by his cousin's sudden appearance.

"Oh..." James heard his mother say quietly, "Sorry love I didn't know you were...me and my big mouth."

"It's nothing," James said hastily, still pretending to be shocked that his cousin had overheard his little 'secret'.

"I'm going to see if the food's ok," James' mother said quickly before throwing him a discrete apologetic look and hastily escaping James' room.

"You like Rose Marshall?" Eli asked raising an eyebrow, "Rose Marshall that went to our primary wizarding school and left Hogwarts for Beauxbatons a couple of years ago?"

"No," James said edgily, hoping he was being convincing.

"I thought you found her annoying?" Eli asked; apparently James' acting wasn't so bad after all.

"I just said that I didn't like her!"

"Sounded pretty convincing with your mother," Eli said with narrowed eyes.

"Yeah well...." James said, pretending to be struggling for an answer, "It was joke; I was being sarcastic."

"You said it pretty seriously,"  
"What, do you _**want**_ me to like her or something?" James said, playing the part of edgy, out-of-answers James Potter. Eli shrugged and James threw on his short, bottle green, Victorian jacket, avoiding his gaze.

"Look, I'm going downstairs," James said quietly, "I can already hear people down in the entrance hall."

"Is she coming?" Eli asked before he had the chance to leave.

"Who?" James asked stupidly; he knew full well 'who'; it was all in the act.

"Rose," Eli said plainly.

"Yeah..." James said quietly, "You won't tell her will you?"

"I thought you said you didn't like her...and you think I'm that _**bothered**_ enough to tell her?" Eli huffed raising an eyebrow, "Who you like is your business, James"

"Why couldn't you have thought that earlier before you started asking questions?" James said with narrow eyes.

"Having an inquisitive mind isn't a crime James," Eli spat, "You could say those who ask more are far more intelligent." And with that, Eli pushed past James and stormed down that stairs. James had to admit that he was a little stunned; just what had happened there? Eli had never really gotten _**annoyed**_ before, if...that was indeed what he'd just seen; if anything it was always James that ended up punching pillows, longing Eli's face to replace the plush material. Thinking no more of it, James ruffled his hair once more and straightened his jacket before he strode down the stairs into the large entrance hall where everyone seemed to be gathering. He groaned internally as he gazed upon his relatives, almost all of them older than him since his parents had had him at quite a mature age; quite a few of his cousins were married with children already. The only people he could really talk to without feeling awkward were old family friends and their children, but even they, when drunk, could get a little annoying, especially Kiki who could completely demolish you if she stumbled and fell on you after drinking a barrel of firewhisky. Upon this thought, James manoeuvred around the crowd in order to keep out of her reach.

"Jaaames," sang a voice from behind as someone tapped his shoulder, and he turned to see the only tolerable person within the mass of elderly witches and wizards.  
"Hey Quinn," James smiled as he embraced his youngest cousin. She was wearing a delicate, sleeveless, cream coloured dress brandishing a large fan in one hand and a champagne glass in another. Her jet black hair was tied back in a tight bun with a white ribbon, but like James' it couldn't help but fall out of place here and there.  
"Dead yet?" She asked with a pained expression on her face.

"Not yet, believe it or not it's only just started," James said miserably, taking a glass of goblin made champagne from a passing waiter.

"I feel like I've been here for hours," She groaned, "Great Aunt Mildred practically called me obese." James spluttered on his mouthful of champagne, stifling a laugh.

"What did she say?" He chuckled, wiping what he had spilt down his chin with the back of his hand.

"That I 'shouldn't be wearing a sleeveless dress with flabby arms like _**that**_'," she smirked, taking a swig of her own champagne, "I just smiled, trying not to make a remark about her kankles." James shuddered.

"Are they visible tonight?" He asked.

"Thankfully, no. I think that's why Victorian dresses were so long back then; so many old women with kankles. Take a look at Queen Vic herself."

"I really don't want to think about it," James grinned, "You know what else is going to make this night absolutely fab?"

"Oh Merlin what?" Quinn said, looking genuinely worried, "Your dad's colleague Shirley isn't going to try and strip off again is she?"

"Oh Merlin, a part of me died that night and it's never coming back," James said as both he and his cousin chuckled to themselves, "It's equally as bad though; Eli and Rose Marshall will be here. I don't think I can handle them both at the same time."

"Ouch," Quinn winced, "I'm glad he's not on your dad's side of the family or else he would have been my cousin too...stuck up troll..."

"Lucky escape," James frowned.

"I'm quite looking forward to Rose's arrival though," She smiled, "Can't wait to meet my baby cousin's girlfriend again; she hasn't turned up for years..."  
"Ha. Ha. Ha," James said sarcastically, "Speaking of which, where's your other half?"

"Somewhere in the crowd talking to old fogies about his job in the ministry no doubt," She giggled, "I do feel sorry for him; I think he still finds my parents frightening even after being married a couple of years."

"Uncle Jack's an auror though," James pointed out, "No wonder he's worried! He's probably afraid he'll get cursed if he steps out of line."

"Too bloody right," Quinn grinned, "He needs to be kept in his place."  
"I feel sorry for the bloke," James chuckled.

"All men need to be kept in line really," She giggled, swinging her hip into James, "It's cruel messing around with Rose, James; why don't you just tell her that you love her?"

"Leave it out," James said rolling his eyes, "Oh, and if Eli asks...tell him I like her ok?"

"Huh? Why?" Quinn asked looking confused.

"You know what Eli's like; if I want something he'll do his best to take it from me-"

"You never did get over that bear incident did you, James?" Quinn said mockingly, sympathetically giving him a one armed hug.

"Hey that bear was mine! When he cried because I had one and he didn't, everyone took it from me to make him happy again and when I cried no-one gave a damn! It was my favourite one! I never did get that bear back...anyway, that's not the point, if he thinks I want Rose Marshall he's going to 'steal' her off of me which means I'll be free from the both of them forever!"

"Ohh, good plan."

"Exactly what I thought," James smiled.

"And if it doesn't work out, be a dear and give the girl a kiss under the mistletoe...it is Christmas after all..."

"Is this for her benefit or for yours?" James smirked.  
"Both..." She grinned, "Consider it my cheapest, yet most valuable Christmas present."

"Depends how much I charge for it..."

"Oh shut up, you'll be gagging for it when you're nice and merry," Quinn winked, gently shaking her champagne glass in front of him.

"...look absolutely stunning! Pleased to meet you; your father and I were quite close before I left for Hogwarts you know. How do you find it being the only one with magical blood in your family? I should say it's rather interesting? I suppose it gives you an advantage being able to understand both of our worlds fully..." James heard his father say over the mumble of the crowd and he froze; he knew who fit that description alright, and his heart accelerated at the thought of it. She was here.

"You alright, lovey?" Quinn asked and James snapped back into reality. He was far too excited; he needed to calm down before he made it too obvious to both his mother and his cousin that _**this**_ was the girl he was head over heels in love with.

"Yeah," James said but his voice was far too high and he cursed himself internally when his eyes strayed, looking for a strand of red hair. Quinn raised an eyebrow and glanced around the room trying to find what had made her cousin act so strange all of a sudden.

"Hey James, who's the redhead?" She asked.

"Where?" James said almost too quickly and Quinn pointed in Lily's direction with her little finger, the others still curled around the champagne glass. James tried desperately to turn at a natural speed but his heart was rushing with excitement, so much so that it almost exploding when he finally caught sight of her.

She was absolutely beautiful.

Her green, floor length dress hugged her figure perfectly, softly splaying out around her, neither straight nor puffy, the shade matching her eyes perfectly. Her red hair was tied back in an elegant bun, a stylish hairpiece of dainty white flowers pinning it into place, with two curling strands framing her pale face. Around her neck she wore a delicate silver chain with a single, small butterfly in the centre, simple but beautiful; typical Lily Evans.

"Lily Evans," James informed his cousin as casually as possible, "She goes to my school."  
"Pretty girl," Quinn said and James noticed a sly sideways glance.

"Mmm...but unavailable,"

"Oh?"

"She doesn't seem to want anyone..."  
"And...do you fall under the 'anyone' category?"

James glanced at his cousin who was wearing a satisfied grin; she knew him far too well.

"Hopefully not for long..."

"What are you p-?"

"JAMES!" came a squeal, interrupting Quinn's reply as he felt strong, slender arms pull him into a tight squeeze, "OH I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!"

_**Oh...crap...**_

He knew who it was by the smell, that sickly sugary smell that came from overpowering glitzy body sprays and far too much lip-gloss. He could see the shimmering nail varnish, hear the jingle of a thousand bracelets, smell the chemicals of her hairspray.

Rose Marshall.

James turned, in her arms, to face her, an overly-pleased expression plastered on his face. It really was a shame how infuriating she was; the girl was stunning. Her hair was dark and thick, curling towards the ends in gentle loose spirals and her eyes were the deepest blue you've ever seen, rimmed with long, liquorice black lashes. Her dress was a powder blue with a wide, round skirt and clasped around her neck was a gigantic glistening necklace that looked more like a chandelier than a piece of jewellery. James mumbled something incoherent and gingerly wrapped his own arms around her slender body before giving her a quick squeeze just as he felt his cousin whisper in his ear.

"Hey James," he heard her grin, "Eli's looking...and so is Ginger..."

_**Author's note: Let the party begin : ) I guess that chapter was just about bringing them all together, hope you enjoyed it although it wasn't really that eventful XD As always, PLEASE REVIEW xxx**_


	6. Flipping Flaming Cerulean

Lily stared back at James' father, nodding and smiling in all the right places as he spoke; she didn't really know what to do or how to feel. She was in Potter's bloody..._**mansion**_ of all places, talking to his parents as if they were the _**bestest friends in the whole wide world,**_ and sure James and his father were two different people, but they looked very much alike and she couldn't help but want to insult him because of it. She just had to remember that she wasn't talking to James and to make sure that she didn't get confused for the rest of the evening; she didn't think her father would really appreciate it if she called his old friend an ignorant, pigheaded, toe rag. It was James' mother, however, that had really startled Lily; both hers and James' smile were identical. They both gave the same wide grin with the corners turning up ever so slightly at the side, giving the occasional cheeky smirk when they thought others weren't looking, complete with the exact same creases around the eyes when they laughed; it was surreal.

_**I wonder what it's like to have something completely identical to someone else...**_

Suddenly there was a loud shriek and Lily felt a hard shove as a strange girl darted past her calling out for none other than Mr Popular James Potter. Lily watched in amusement as James emerged from the parting crowd, turning gingerly to face her only when she'd become his tight fitting, glitzy, blue belt, making it extremely hard for James to find something to hug.

"OH I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!" she heard the girl squeal and Lily couldn't help but give a satisfied smirk. So this was the infamous Rose Marshall, James Potter's little stalker; in other words James Potter's very own James Potter. Oh how it pleased her to think that James had his own little pest to follow him everywhere, to bother him for his affections every day, to stick to him like a leech like he did her. Maybe after a while he'd realise exactly why Lily was so uptight with him, how annoying he actually was, why they had continued to argue each and every day since their first year, or better yet, realise that he and Rose were perfect for each other and disappear off to France with her.

"Oh aren't they adorable?" Lily heard James' mother whisper to her husband, linking arms.

"Match made in heaven," Lily said with a smile, taking a sip of champagne.

"If you say so," said a male voice and Lily turned to face a tall boy with extremely dark hair, pale skin and blue eyes. He wore a short, royal blue Victorian coat and his hair lay in loose windswept curls; he was absolutely gorgeous, like a male model and yet strangely familiar.

"Why do you say that, Eli?" asked James' mother, and Lily listened with great interest.

"He doesn't really like her; I know he doesn't, even if he says he does," he said with a curled lip.

_**Hold on...**_

"James said he likes Rose?" Lily said bewildered; that wasn't at all what she had heard, in which case, why would he have bothered tailing Lily around all this time? If he did like her, tonight wasn't going to be half as fun as she'd hoped.

_**Nah...**_

This guy was right; James had to be bluffing but why? Surely not to make her jealous? That was the oldest trick in the book. Yet again, if James did like Rose, she would be _**free**_.

"Oh...well...it was meant to be a secret, Eli," James' mother said quietly.

"Well if he's going to do something about it why should it be a secret?" Eli snapped.

"Well that's what I thought, it's not like James to keep it all in; he's been after..." Lily said but stopped abruptly; clearly his parents knew nothing about her relationship with James.

"After what?" Eli asked with a raised eyebrow, suddenly noticing Lily for the first time.

"Oh...nothing," Lily said quickly, "It's just I've known him since he was eleven and when he erm...likes someone he can be very forward."  
"Is that so?" James' father grinned, looking rather nostalgic about something; something told Lily James was very much like his father indeed.

"He never told me he's liked other girls," James' mother said taken aback.

"Well he wouldn't would he, seeing how good a secret keeper you are," James' father laughed and his wife gave him a stern look.

"I don't believe we've ever met before," Eli said with a raised eyebrow, "Unless you've changed beyond recognition, I don't think I've ever seen you at a previous Christmas party."  
"This is my first one," Lily explained, "Mr Potter and my father are old friends reunited."

"Oh...well then I'm Eli, James' cousin," Eli smiled rather attractively, holding out a hand and Lily shook it in return.

"Lily Evans," She smiled, "James'...friend."

"Well would you like another drink Miss Evans?" Eli smirked and offered his arm to her, "My aunt and uncle spent a fortune on the bar so I think it best to get absolutely..._**sozzled **_out of respect."

Lily laughed politely but hesitated for a moment. Eli didn't like James; it was clear by the way he had talked about him and his possible feelings towards Rose, was he hoping she'd dish the dirt on his cousin if he flirted with his _**friend?**_ Lily smiled and stepped forwards to take Eli's arm; she was a big girl, she was well capable of handling the situation if he pried too far, and anyway...since when was she on _**James Potter's**_ side?

***

This was not good _**at all**_, probably _**the worst**_ Christmas party ever in fact. For starters, Rose's arms were strapped so tightly around James' waist that he was losing circulation in his lower half, and secondly, his infuriating cousin looked like he was making a move on _**his **_Lily, despite his efforts to make him think that he only had eyes for the vice around his middle!

"Hey Rose, why don't I get you a drink?" James asked breathlessly with his eyes locked on the pair, desperate to follow them out into the garden.

"Ok," Rose squealed excitedly, releasing James' waist and taking his arm instead, who shot Quinn a miserable look as she watched them stroll into the garden, completely surprised by his request.

"Oh I really have missed you all James. France is great and everything but no-one has a sense of humour like the Potters! You're all so funny! I was saying to my friend Belle how she must come over and-she's French you know-that she must come over and meet you all. Oh she'd love you. But I have had to warn her how much you like brunettes, James because I know what you're like; you wouldn't be able to keep your hands off of us!" Rose laughed ridiculously.

_**Just kill me.**_

That was the thing about Rose, she found everything absolutely side splittingly hilarious...and her laugh was the most irritating thing he'd ever heard.

"Mmm brunettes are...nice," was all James could answer. Rose almost fell about with laughter and thumped James hard on the arm.

"Oh James don't be such a tease!" She said through her fit of giggles.

Trying desperately to tug a babbling Rose towards the bar faster, James finally caught sight of Lily and Eli who were now sipping on brightly coloured drinks. A liquorice wand stuck out of Lily's bright blue drinkas Eli's hands blindfolded her, a large grin on his face.

"It tastes like sherbert and rose water..." he heard her say curiously, "Ok I give up, what is it?"

"It's called a Flaming Cerulean," Eli smirked removing his hands, and when James had gotten closer, he realised that Lily's drink was actually clear in colour surrounded by a ring of bright blue flames, "It's very popular in Durmstrang."

"So you go to Durmstrang then?" Lily asked, stirring her drink with the liquorice wand.

"Yeah, he loves it so much he doesn't come home for the holidays," James cut in, "Hasn't seen his parents for...what is it again, two...three years? But then again you've never been the family man have you Eli? What'll it be Rose?"

"Excuse me _**Potter**_ but we were having a descent conversation before y-"Lily began but she was shortly interrupted.

"Not Eli from primary wizarding school?" Rose asked.

"Yes," Eli said impatiently, "I _**did**_ _**actually**_ go to Hogwarts with you before we both left for different schools, Rose,"

"_**That's where I've seen him before!"**_ Lily thought, _**"He sat next to me in first year herbology...before he disappeared and I had to sit with Potter..."**_

"You did?" Rose said looking puzzled and Eli's jaw tightened, "I don't remember that..."

Then once again she broke into a fit of highly irritating, inappropriate laughter.

"Rose love, drink?" James asked trying to shut her up and Rose was suddenly positively glowing with the fact that he'd called her _**love**_.

"Sherbert and rose water you say?" She asked Lily and she nodded, "Whatever she's got then please, James."

"It's called a Flaming Cerulean," Eli said, suddenly becoming very quiet.

"Aren't you going to introduce us, James?" Lily asked as the barman handed him another Flaming Cerulean and a Firewhisky.

"Oh right," James said through his mouthful.

"Lily this is Rose Marshall, Rose this is Lily Evans," Eli cut in before James could swallow his drink, "Rose is someone James and I have known since childhood, Lily is one of James' friends from school...and as of tonight one of mine."

Lily smiled warmly and James narrowed his eyes as he felt a painfully jealous twist in the stomach.

"Careful Lily," he said bitterly, "Turn round for more than ten seconds and your little _**friend**_ will already be back in Bulgaria."  
"Cleary my departure from Hogwarts to Durmstrang has traumatized you cousin; I didn't know you missed me so much," Eli smirked.

"Eli, just because the party's Victorian themed doesn't mean you have to talk like you're actually from the nineteenth century," James snapped.

"I'll think you'll find its called class James, I don't suppose you've heard of it?"

"If classy people practically disown their parents then I think I may have misunderstood the term."

"Oh don't be so dramatic I haven't disowned my-"

"Tell me, do you enjoy telling them you're not coming home for Christmas every year, do you look forward to it?"

"James, stop being such a prat," Lily snapped.

"Well I haven't seen him since seventh year either," Rose interjected, defending James.

"And why would you want to see me?" Eli asked curiously.

"I was just making a statement."  
"Tell me; is this an interrogation or a Christmas party?" Eli asked incredulously.

"Feeling guilty now are we, Eli?" James smirked.

"James, shut it," Lily spat.

"Actually James, my parents know that it's been in my best interests that I've stayed in Bulgaria over Christmas; if I hadn't I wouldn't have gotten to where I am today."

"And what is that?" Rose asked and James looked at her in disbelief.

"You mean you haven't heard of anything he's done? He boasts about it often enough."

"What _**have**_ you done?" Lily asked curiously and James wished he hadn't played on the subject; she was bound to be impressed by the slimy git.

"Everything," James growled under his breath and he thought for one horrible moment that he saw the corners of Eli's mouth lift with satisfaction.

"I'd rather not boast," He said quietly.

"Oh come off of it!" James laughed in disbelief.

"Well you seem to know a lot about it James, why don't you tell me?" Lily asked with a satisfied smirk, taking an innocent sip of her flipping Flaming Sapphire or whatever it was.

_**She's bloody enjoying this!**_

Just as James was about to retaliate the sound of live, classical music drifted out into the garden and Eli interrupted him.

"Lily, I don't know about you but I'm rather bored of this conversation, clearly my cousin doesn't have anything remotely interesting to say; would you join me for a dance?"

James clenched his fists.

_**I'm going to hit the smarmy git.**_

"Oh that's a good idea!" Rose said, laughing inappropriately.

"Well I did actually ask Lily but-" Eli started rather taken aback and Rose laughed louder.

"I didn't mean you silly, I meant me and James!"

"Right," Eli said in a monotone voice, "Lily?"

"What?" James said slightly stunned, "Oh I dunno Rose I'm not...the best." It was true that James had never danced at one of his parents' parties before; he usually just stood back with Sirius laughing at Quinn and her husband taking the mick out of the whole ordeal.

"Oh pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase, James? It'll be fun I promise!"

"Will it be fun?" Lily asked Eli under her breath, a little uneasy about the idea herself.

"If he likes her as much as he says he does it should be," Eli said quietly so as Rose didn't hear, staring at James as he said it. It wasn't the answer she'd wanted, she'd wanted to know if it was going to be fun for _**her**_ not Potter, but now she knew what Eli was doing and decided to play along; anything to get under his skin.

"Let's go then," Lily said hooking his arm and without a second thought James gave Rose his answer.

"Ok then let's go," He said, doing the same and Rose squealed with joy.

_**Please, PLEASE let me be a natural at this...**_

_**Author's note: Well I officially failed at getting it done for Xmas OR the New Year so it's just going to have to be an off season story XD As always PLEASE REVIEW and HAPPY NEW YEAR! From me xxx**_


	7. Punch and Lily

**Lily**

Lily chewed on her lip as she lined up with the women, standing opposite Eli. Why had she agreed to do this? She had absolutely no idea what she was meant to do and she was going to make an idiot of herself. It was too late to go back now, the music had started and Eli was bowing before her, his floppy dark hair falling into his eyes. Lily watched in amusement as James suddenly lurched forward with clearly no idea what he was doing and had to stop herself from laughing when she heard Rose's rather unusual laugh next to her. When Eli straightened he took a step forward and placed his palm against hers but she could tell that his mind was elsewhere, his attention fixed on James and Rose as she whispered softly into his ear, the anger clear on his face.

What was it that James had done to make him want to ruin any chance that he may have with Rose Marshall? Was it simply to prove his theory right and that James was bluffing or was it that ongoing competition that seemed to go on between them? And she didn't really appreciate being used like this; did Eli really think she was attracted to him and therefore using her, or did he actually sense that she too had wanted to take James off of his high horse, and therefore thought that she was willingly playing along with his little game?

When the music picked up, Eli rotated with her palm against his, thankfully leading her all the way so that she didn't have to guess the next dance step. Suddenly James stumbled with inexperience and rammed into Eli causing him to thread his fingers through hers in order to keep his balance. Feeling unsteady on her heels, Lily stumbled and Eli grabbed hold of her shoulders pulling her into his arms.

"Perhaps you should have learnt your left from your right before you decided to ask Rose to dance, James," Eli spat as James steadied himself and Eli squeezed tighter.

That was when the problem started.

The smell of him was overwhelming, extremely alluring, and she found herself leaning further into his chest in order to take more of it in, but she soon snapped out of it when she saw the look in James' eyes.

Ok, now she really did feel bad. She couldn't deny that she didn't get along with James and that she liked putting him in his place, letting a little air out of that huge head of his once in a while, but she never wanted to hurt him. Perhaps Eli had been right, perhaps James had been bluffing after all, that he didn't like Rose as much as he had been making out. The anger in those eyes of his had been the only flaw in his plan, she'd seen that look far too often, especially when she'd said something she'd had to apologise for later on. It was simply a mask for the hurt.

James hurriedly turned away, averting his gaze and Lily suddenly found herself free of Eli's arms and surrounded by a circle of rotating women with Rose Marshall opposite her, looking absolutely miserable now that she had to be separated from James and all the sympathy she had felt for him vanished. Why was he purposefully hurting this girl when he knew how much she cared for him? Was it all to make her jealous? Eli was right; it was pathetic and maybe Eli's plan to reveal his lie wasn't so bad after all.

Soon the girls had to split into partners and Lily went out of her way to make sure that she didn't end up with one of Potter's relatives. Sure enough, she found herself dancing with none other than Rose Marshall and Lily desperately wanted to say something to her about James, but before she could say anything, Rose addressed her first.

"What did he do?" She said and Lily gazed at her stupidly.

"W-what?"

"What did he do to make you hate him so much?"

Great. What was she going to say now?

_**Oh, he picked on my best friend and has been bugging me to go out with him for years?**_

_**He's a pigheaded, obnoxious little toe-rag who doesn't understand the concept of 'no'?**_

She wasn't about to tell the girl what Potter was really like, she didn't know how she would take it.

"I don't hate him," She said as convincingly as possible.

"Yes you do, I remember you, you know," She said in her as-a-matter-of-fact voice, "How can I forget the girl who had every single bit of his attention so effortlessly and unwillingly when I'd been fighting for it since I was nine." Lily blinked, speechless. In truth, she couldn't remember Rose ever attending Hogwarts, it was only by coincidence that she had remembered Eli; it was near seven years ago after all.

"N-nine?" Lily asked innocently.

"We knew each other before Hogwarts, James, Eli and I," Rose said, "I was stupidly playing on this flimsy bit of rope that some kids had tied to tree branch so that they could swing across a river. It broke of course." She laughed then, as annoying as it was it was full of nostalgia and Lily couldn't help but wonder why she had left Hogwarts for Beauxbatons when it meant leaving someone she was so fond of.

"James and Eli used to get along then. They were playing with those mini broomsticks, do you remember them?"  
"I'm muggle born," Lily smiled and Rose giggled.

"Well I suppose you don't then," She said, "They were flying about with them when the rope snapped and James saw it happen. Even when he was nine he was pretty good with a broomstick. He swooped down and pulled me out; after that I was smitten with him and never left his side. Bless him; I must have been such an annoying child."

Lily smiled but she couldn't help but feel a little confused, why was Rose telling her all of this?  
"Everyone loved James, you know, everyone wanted to be his best friend; I think that's why James and Eli don't get along today, he sort of got drowned out by it all. So how is it that you're the only one, without any reason at all, that can't stand him?"

"I erm...I guess we just never clicked," Lily shrugged.

"But you clicked with Eli?" Rose asked with a raised eyebrow, "Are you telling me that _**that**_ was just coincidence, that you two aren't in it together to rub him up the wrong way?"

"I wouldn't say I've 'clicked' with him," Lily insisted, "To be honest I didn't know that James and Eli had such competitiveness when he offered to buy me a drink."

"Oh yeah," Rose said giving Eli a swift glance, "Eli loves it, I can tell by the way he looks at James."

"And James does nothing to provoke it?" Lily asked doubtfully.

"Just trust me," Rose said softly, "Eli's bad news, you don't know James like I do."

Lily sighed as Rose's eyes averted to the men's huddle and opened her mouth to speak.

"Rose, I think you should know that James isn't exactly-" But suddenly, she was unexpectedly grabbed round the waist by one of James' relatives spinning around the dance floor.

_**James**_

_**Why, for the love of Merlin's saggy backside, did I do this?**_

James stood in a line of men opposite Rose Marshall as they waited for the music to begin for the next dance; to his left stood Eli looking rather smug opposite Lily, the only girl he really wanted to dance with and to his right, opposite Quinn, stood Quinn's husband, Matt, who grinned knowingly at James. It was true that James had no idea how these dances were supposed to go; he'd never participated in one before, so it must have been obvious to Matt, who'd more than often dared him to dance with him if he played the woman's part, that he had been roped into it by unforeseen circumstances, A.K.A Lily Evans accepting his stupid cousin's dance invitation.

"Want any tips?" Matt whispered impishly under his breath.

"No thanks, I've seen the way you dance," James smirked.

"I was talking about pulling girls actually mate," Matt joked and James glared at him, although the corners of his mouth twitched as he tried not to laugh.

Suddenly the violinists began to play and James watched as the other men bowed to their partners, causing him to suddenly bend at a right angle to make it look like he actually knew that bowing happened before the dance. James straightened as Rose's infuriating and unnecessary laughter erupted throughout the hall and for a split second, he thought he saw the corners of Lily's mouth twitch in amusement. Suddenly the men stepped forward and raised their palms to the level of their eyes, causing James to lurch forward and do the same before he became completely out of time. Rose grinned and placed her palm gently against his before she leaned in, her breath lightly tickling his ear.

"You might want to turn with me in a minute," She giggled.

Damn, was it that obvious that he had no idea what he was doing? James smiled at her as innocently as possible and took a step to his right to begin spinning with her, but instead, he rammed into an unsuspecting Quinn.

"Other way, Sunshine," Matt chuckled and James stumbled backwards, ramming into Eli instead who also stumbled, making Lily wobble slightly with him as he clutched her hand.

"Perhaps you should have learnt your left from your right before you decided to ask Rose to dance, James," Eli spat as he caught Lily and held her steady in his arms. James' insides wriggled painfully at the sight of her pressed tightly against his chest and he turned angrily to face Rose once more. If he was going to impress Lily he was going to have to be better at this, and he had better not lose his temper either. Swallowing back the thousands of insults fighting their way through his lips, James raised his hand once more and this time, span gracefully with Rose's palm held against his.

"Don't mind him," Rose whispered, "I think you're doing great for your first dance."

"Liar," James smirked and Rose grinned back at him, causing Eli to glare at them both; clearly he didn't want James to look like he was having fun, he wanted to ruin his 'relationship' with Rose.

Suddenly James noticed the men separating from their partners once more, forming a spinning huddle as the women did the same. James slyly stepped away from Rose and joined them, looking like he'd known this step all along, trying his best not to grin at the expression on Eli's face.

_**Yeah that's right, James Potter can dance. In your face, you stuck up git.**_

Unfortunately Eli seemed intent on sticking to him like a leech, and when the men split into partners, James found himself dancing with him.

"Having fun?" James asked with a patronizing smile and Eli smiled back at him.

"Lily Evans is fun," he jabbed and James felt his heart crack, "Shame I hadn't gotten to know her better before I left. Strange, I thought she was more _**your**_ type. I half expected _**her**_ to be draped round you, not Rose Marshall."

"Funny how things turn out isn't it?" James muttered.

"Oh come off it," Eli snapped, "I know you don't like Rose Marshall."

"Oh yeah?" James advanced, "How do you know? When do you see her? When do you talk to her?"

"I don't have to talk to Rose to find these things out, James," Eli spat, "Talking to your little friend gave me all I needed. You're bluffing."

"What are you talking about?" James asked.

"As soon as I heard you talking about Rose I knew you had to be bluffing. You've never been interested in her before so why should you choose now, after not having seen her for years? I knew you were lying but I couldn't understand why until I spoke to Lily, quite accidentally as it happens. I was talking to your parents actually until she decided to join in, she said very briefly that she knew what you were like, pursuing other girls."  
"So what if I've liked...other girls," James said, clearly Lily had made her point vague in order to give Eli a broader picture; she was the _**only**_ girl he'd ever pursued.

"Well that's the thing," Eli smirked satisfied, "If you've liked other girls since Rose left Hogwarts, how could you possibly fall for someone you never see and hardly keep in contact with? It doesn't make sense; especially seeing as you had no romantic interest in her before. So then I was confused, why would you want to make both myself and your parents think that you'd fallen for her? Simple; it was a distraction."

"Get to the point, Sherlock," James said, getting slightly worried now.

"She was coming to the party, I knew that much, so it had to be a distraction for someone at the party, someone you really had feelings for. I didn't know who that person was...until I met Lily that is."  
_**Oh...Merlin...**_

"And why should it be Lily?" James asked casually.

"Try because she's the only one at the party you could possibly have feelings for beside Rose, unless you plan to tell me that you practice incest or have an attraction towards half-trolls...it was just a case of finding a stranger within a room of people I already knew."

"So you were using her, all this time just to get at me, to get me to tell you the truth?" James asked angrily.

"Just like how you used Rose so that I wouldn't steal her off of you," Eli said with narrowed eyes, "And, look how well that worked out."  
"Why do you do this?" James demanded, "Why do you deliberately go out of your way to make me feel like crap?"

Eli shrugged his expression serious this time.

"I can't help it if I'm better than you, James," he snarled, "You watch, I'm sure Lily will agree with me by the end of tonight."  
_**That's it...**_

James balled his fist and leaned back aiming to punch Eli full on in the face, but to his horror the dance had moved on and Matt bumped into him with Lily Evans in his arms, causing him to completely miss Eli and hit Lily instead. With a scream she hit the floor and slid from Matt's arms in a heap, causing Rose and her partner, who had been close behind them to stumble and send her crashing into the table full of punch.

"Jeez what's going on?" Matt yelled, dropping to her level.

"Lily!" James cried and bent down to the floor.

"Get away from me, you idiot!" She cried, clutching the side of her face as he heaved her into his arms.

"My dress!" Rose cried as Eli rushed over to her and pulled her up.

"What happened?" asked Lily's father.

"Is she hurt?" Eli's mother asked, standing behind her son.

"Nice going, James," Eli smirked and James hurried from the room with Lily in his arms.

"Let go of me! Put me down, Potter!" She squealed as he carried her outside, placing her on one of the benches near the pond.

"Lily I'm so sorry!" he said as he tried to pry her hand away from her face, "Here, let me-"  
"No! Don't touch me!" She cried but he was too strong for her and managed to hold her hands in his, revealing a rather red and slightly swollen cheekbone. Tears of pain rained down her cheeks as she tried to tear her hands from his grip.

"Lily if you just hold still and let me-!"  
"I don't want you to do anything!" She yelled, getting to her feet, "What is wrong with you?"

"It was an accident!" James said desperately, also getting to his feet, "Do you honestly think I'd hurt you? I'd never do that!"  
"Well if it wasn't me it was going to be him!" She cried, her fingertips gently pressing at the swell on her face, "Jeez what are you, an animal?"

"Listen...look at me...will you calm down?"

Lily huffed and stood still as he held her wrists and gently lifted her head, trying not to lose himself in the warmth and softness of her skin.

"Look, you stay here, I'll just go get you some ice," he said quietly making his way towards the house.

_**Perfect, could this party seriously get any worse?**_

_**Authors note: Ok, I know it's getting ridiculous now with my gaps between posting and that it's no longer an Xmas story but I have had severe writers block and had absolutely no idea where I was going with this chapter lol so sorry for the delay! It's not the best, I know, but I promise there will be mush in the next chappie, I think Lily needs it after that whack XD PLEASE REVIEW as always.**_


	8. Heart to Heart

"What happened?" James' mother demanded as James wrapped some ice in a tea towel, "One moment we were all dancing, the next minute someone's lying injured on the floor!"

"Look, it's nothing," James said placing the ice cube tray back in the freezer, "I think we all just got a bit carried away."

"Mmm," James' mother sighed, reaching out for the ice, "Look love, I'll take care of that, you go back to Rose and have fun."  
"No!" James said quickly, hiding the ice behind his back, causing his mother to eye him suspiciously, "I erm...it was me that accidentally hit her when I was dancing so I want to make sure she's ok."

"Aww, my little gentleman," his mother cooed softly, ruffling his hair and giving him a peck on the cheek, "Come back inside soon though, yes? It's cold outside." And with that she left James alone in the kitchen.

James sighed heavily and eyed what was now the deep blue snow through the glass of the kitchen door; flecks of new snow falling from the evening sky as twinkling fairy lights lit the garden with a warm yellow glow.

_**I can't believe I just punched Lily Evans in the face...**_

It was just typical for this sort of thing to happen, especially seeing as it was the first, and after what had just happened, probably the last time Lily Evans would ever turn up on his doorstep looking more attractive than any girl should be allowed to. Pulling his Victorian coat tighter around his torso, James braved the snow with his tea towel of ice in search of a battered and bruised Lily Evans, travelling down to the pond at the bottom of the garden until her saw her shivering on the bench.

"Thanks," she grumbled as he handed her the towel and he edgily perched himself on the bench next to her.

"Does it still hurt?" he asked quietly.

"What do you think?" she spat, pointing to the purple smudge that had suddenly appeared beneath her eye, "You hit me pretty hard you know."

"I'm really sorry, Lily," he said looking concerned, "I wasn't aiming for you, I was aiming for my prat of a cousin."

"Must have said something bad to deserve this," Lily replied, pressing at the swell.

"Trust me he deserved it...don't do that," James said, pulling her wrist, "You'll only make it worse. Just keep the ice on it."

"Fine," Lily grumbled, slapping the ice back on her face, "What did he say anyway?"  
"Nothing," James said quickly.

"Potter, don't tell me you hit me over nothing."

"I didn't mean to!"

"I know you didn't, but now that I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end, I know it must have been pretty bad for you to hit him like that."

"It wasn't exactly....I mean he kind of...he just got to me that's all," James mumbled, "It's not what he said, it's what he meant by it and...what he was doing."

"Oh..." Lily said, that could only mean one thing; it had been about her and Eli had been right about James bluffing.

"Rose Marshall's pretty interesting," she said, trying to change the subject.

"Interesting is the nice way of putting it," James said, breathing a laugh, "She's sweet though...as annoying as she is."

"Eli seems to think you feel the opposite."

"Not anymore he doesn't..."

"Oh?" She asked playing along and James nodded. It was silent then. It was the first time in almost seven years that they had been alone together, alone without screaming at each other or James pestering her that is. It was awkward; they didn't exactly know what to say to each other, these silences had often been filled with jabs or James' flirting or apologies or..._**Snivellus**_, and he really didn't want to go back to that right now. From the corner of his eye he watched as her delicate frame shivered in the cold and he shook off his jacket, draping it around her shoulders.

"Won't you be cold?" She asked eyeing the thin shirt he was wearing.

"It's called _**class**_, Evans," James said with his best Eli impersonation and Lily chuckled breathily before, once again, the conversation ceased and they found themselves sitting in awkward silence once more. With both unwillingness and rapture, Lily pulled James' jacket tighter around her body, discovering that he smelt just as wonderful as his cousin as she breathed in the spray and the fabric softener.

"So...where's your sister? You have a sister right?" James asked; he wanted to start a conversation, anything as long as it wasn't to do with Eli or their escapades at Hogwarts. But James' heart dropped when he saw the look on her face.

"Oh," Lily said quietly, "She's erm...she's with her boyfriend and his family."

"And...you like this boyfriend too right?" James asked glumly.

"Urgh, no!" Lily said looking disgusted, "Why did you ask that anyway?"

"It's just...when I asked you seemed...never mind," James said not wanting to pry.

"Me and my sister...we don't get along," Lily said quietly, knowing exactly what he had meant.

"Oh," James said, "Well that's not as bad as I th-"  
"No we..._**really**_ don't get along," Lily said with a small smile in his direction, "So much so that she's practically disowned me and considers me a freak of nature."

_**You. Really. Are. A. Prize. Idiot. James Potter.**_

Why was it that everything he did turned out be the biggest fail?

"Sorry," James said quietly.

"Why are you sorry?" Lily asked.

"I can't seem to get anything right when I'm around you," he said sadly, "I shouldn't have said anything."

"Yeah well you didn't know," Lily reassured and once again they were plunged into silence.

"It will be alright you know," James said softly, breaking the silence, "Family feuds never last forever. People grow up, and when it happens, you'll find yourselves laughing about the whole thing."

"You think so?" Lily asked and James was slightly shocked to find her eyes glistening with tears, "I really don't know how much more I can do to try to fix it." And suddenly, without warning, Lily Evans burst into tears, tiny glistening droplets cascading down her pale cheeks as she buried her face in her hands.

_**Once again, Prize idiot. **_

"I'm s-sorry!" She choked through her tears, "I'm b-being an i-i-idiot!" James swallowed uncomfortably and edged closer, wanting more than anything to take her in his arms and hold her, squeeze her tight; if only she'd let him. Bravely, James reached out and put his arm around her, giving her a one armed squeeze as she continued to sob into her hands, his heart jumping wildly in his chest with excitement and shock that she was actually letting him.

"I'm sorry Lily, I shouldn't have said anything; it's none of my business," James grumbled, "You're not being an idiot; it's perfectly normal to feel like this."

"I-it's just I h-h-haven't been able to talk a-about it to anyone b-but her and she-she won't listen to me!"

"Your parents don't know?"

"N-no," Lily sobbed, "It will only upset them."

"Well bottling it up isn't doing any good is it?" James said softly, "Look what it's doing to you."  
"I-I know," she sniffed, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Don't you talk to your friends about it? What about Alice?"  
"They've never m-met Tuney, they wouldn't know how to help."  
"So you'd rather keep it all to yourself and end up spilling it out to someone you'd never tell in the first place?" James chuckled.

"You...you must think I'm a real idiot," Lily sniffed, smiling a little as she said it.

"You know I'd never think that of you, Lily," James said in a voice so low it was almost a whisper, and she rotated a little to face him, "Crying doesn't make you an idiot, Lily. If anything, crying about things makes it a lot better. You spend the whole time feeling crap, trying not to cry, and when you finally do, you reveal everything you've wanted to say because you've got nothing left to loose and find that if you hadn't, you'd still be back in the same position hiding everything away. To be honest, it would save everyone a whole lot of time if you just burst into tears straight away."

Lily laughed and shook her head, wiping the last traces of gloopy eyeliner from her skin.

"Thanks," She said softly, a small smile spread across her face, "I didn't expect it, but I needed that."

"Anytime," James smirked with his lop-sided grin. Suddenly his expression became serious; this was his chance to make things alright between them.

"You know...if you want...you can always talk to me about it," James said anticipating the worst, "I mean, I know we're not close but...I do care about you Lily."

"I know you do..._**Potter**_," Lily joked. Then suddenly, without warning, they were staring softly at each other and she felt the strangest urge overcome her. Without a second thought, Lily leaned in slowly and placed a tender kiss on James' cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered in his ear before quickly standing and heading back to James' house and the party as quickly and casually as possible.

James watched as she left, the feel of her lips permanently burnt into his skin. Maybe he still had a chance, maybe things would be ok now that she had confided in him. It made his chest swell to think that she's shared something with him that nobody else had known; she trusted him, she _**kissed**_ him.

_**She took my jacket...**_

_**Author's note: ok so this chapter is kind of short and I wanted a little fluff because I'm having withdrawal symptoms but not so much that it's perfect between them JUST yet XD I did keep my promise and post fast-ish though even if it is short...*cheeky grin* Hope you like it and PLEASE REVIEW as always :P xxx**_


	9. Revelation

**Lily **

As soon as she was certain that the wild rose bushes had removed her from James' sight, Lily ran into the house and into the deserted kitchen, pressing her back against the wall and closed her eyes. What was that all about? Had she really been so desperate to confide in someone about her sister that as soon as someone mentions her she just spills everything out? That someone being James Potter, the one person she had never felt she could have a decent conversation with let alone confide in. It was just...wrong!

Well...to be perfectly honest it hadn't been James Potter at all. James Potter was loud, obnoxious, intolerable, pigheaded and a pest. The boy she had just confided in was the complete opposite, a stranger, someone she had never met before that somehow looked completely identical to James Potter. That had to be the answer; James Potter was not the sort of person to offer a shoulder to cry on; he was a git.

And she certainly wouldn't give James Potter a kiss. Not in a million years, even if it was a peck on the cheek; he'd get too carried away and use it against her, boasting it throughout Hogwarts.

**_I mean I wouldn't even do it in the first place whether or not he did use it against me..._**

Suddenly, the kitchen door opened releasing an abrupt burst of music and conversation from the room behind and Lily darted behind it; she didn't want anyone to see that she had been crying so badly. People ask too many questions. She watched as Eli emerged from behind the door. Swiftly draining the last few dregs of Fire Whisky from his glass, he placed it onto the table and exited the room, finally deciding to climb the large staircase. Lily sighed with relief that Eli hadn't lingered and found a clean glass in one of the cupboard, pouring herself a new glass of Fire Whisky to bring her back to the real world.

Lily placed the glass against her lips and let the whisky burn them gently as she caught sight of herself in the kitchen window before it had a chance to pass them and enter her mouth. Gasping she reached up to touch the giant purple blotch on her cheek and swiftly covered it up with her hand. Making up her mind that she had to get a proper look at the damage, she decided to dodge the other people enjoying the party and head upstairs in search of a mirror. Copying Eli's actions, she swallowed the entire glass of Fire Whisky, wincing, and hurried up the large staircase.

Lily slowed when she reached the top of the staircase; she could hear Rose Marshall and her heart sank. Rose had also been involved in the collision and she couldn't help but wonder how she felt seeing as James hadn't been there to help her but had swiftly left the room with Lily in his arms instead. Well however she had felt then, she sounded angry now and Lily decided to swiftly enter the bathroom in order to avoid her at all costs.

Lily walked over to the mirror and leant heavily on the basin in front of it shocked at the vivid colour of her black eye. **_Stupid Potter..._**

What was she doing here? She didn't even know his parents well enough to deserve an invite and when she had decided to turn up she had gotten punched in the face!

**_Shortly followed by a breakdown and subconscious kissing..._**

No, it wasn't like that. It was only a peck and he was being sweet. When was that ever likely to happen again? She wouldn't kiss Potter again she was definite.

**_Almost definite..._**

No what was she saying, of course she was definite! Potter was an idiot, she wasn't the type to go around kissing idiots...even if they did offer their shoulder to cry on when no-one else did. Suddenly the reflection of a blue figure appeared behind her and Lily whirled around to face Rose.

**_Oh crap...Please don't let her hit me...I don't want another black eye..._**

Oh," Rose said surprised, coming to a halt, "Sorry, I didn't know anyone was-"  
"Don't worry about it," Lily smiled, trying to be friendly even though she could imagine Rose's fist getting very friendly with her face very soon. Rose stared at Lily but she didn't seem to be angry, instead Lily noticed the redness, the puffiness of her eyes. She looked tired and hurt and drawn; all that for James Potter?

"Looks like it hurts," Rose said, nodding at her bruise.

"Its fine, I've got ice," Lily replied holding up the towel James had given her, "Are you ok?"

"It was just punch," Rose shrugged but Lily continued to stare straight into her eyes; she couldn't help it, she wanted to understand how anyone could want someone like James so badly. She wanted Rose to confide in her, she wanted to assure her that she wanted nothing from James, that she simply wasn't interested...even if she did just have the powerful urge to kiss him.

**_Shut up. It was a peck on the cheek._**

"Is erm...is James downstairs?" Rose asked and Lily wanted to grab her shoulders and tell her to snap out of it; she could do better than Potter; he was a git.

"He's in the garden I think," Lily replied, "He might have come in by now though; it's cold outside."

"Right," Rose nodded, "Well I'm...I'm going to go downstairs now." And with that Rose hurried out of the bathroom leaving Lily to watch the space where she once stood.

**_Right, that's it, I can't take it anymore; I'm going to show her what Potter's really like, even if it kills me. _**

**Rose**

Rose watched as Lily stepped forward to speak just as Matt grabbed her round her waist and whisked her off around the dance floor, leaving her to dance with another one of James' relatives. Allowing him to take her by the waist, she smiled and let him lead her across the floor, until suddenly, there was an almighty scream and a soft mass was at her feet, causing her to stumble as they tangled and wobbled beneath her. To her horror she felt a sharp pain as her hip slammed into the wooden table against the back wall and she fell into a heap. Icy cold, sticky liquid rained down onto her dress and soaked through to her skin.

"Jeez what's going on?" She heard Matt yell, dropping to his knees in front of Lily Evans who appeared to be sprawled across the floor.

"Lily!" James cried and bent down to her level.

"Get away from me, you idiot!" Lily cried, clutching the side of her face as he heaved her into his arms and Rose winced as her stomach lurched with envy, tearing her eyes away from them.

"My dress!" she cried suddenly realizing the extent of the damage done, her hands pawing at the red stains on the powder blue.

"What happened?" asked Lily's father.

"Is she hurt?" Eli's mother asked, standing behind her son.

"Nice going, James," Eli smirked and to Rose's disappointment, James hurried from the room with Lily in his arms. Within seconds, a stranger offered her his hand and she accepted miserably, allowing him to heave her to her feet. Sadly she watched as James hurried Lily to the bottom of the garden and to her embarrassment, she felt the hot sting of tears in her eyes and hurried from the room before anybody could notice.

Running into the upstairs bathroom, Rose turned on the taps and threw as much of the dress' skirt as possible into the basin, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.

She was such an idiot. Had she really thought that James' feeling for her had changed in the slightest since he had last seen her? How could it have when she had spent all these in France and he had done the same in England with Lily Evans? Running her fingers through her hair she turned on the taps only slightly and began to rinse the punch out of her dress, scrubbing and scrubbing until most of the stains had faded if not vanished.

Even when she had been at Hogwarts he had refused to pay attention to anyone else other than **_Lily_**. Grabbing a handful of toilet paper, Rose dabbed at her eyes, groaning when she discovered that most of her makeup had been removed by the tears. Why couldn't she just forget about stupid James Potter? Sniffing she pulled the wet half of her dress out of the sink and turned off the taps before going on the hunt for some form of towel or dry cloth. As soon as she left the bathroom however, she rammed into something hard and stumbled backwards, slamming her back into the wall behind her.

"Why is everyone around here so clumsy?" Eli snapped, straightening out his jacket.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking," Rose snapped, standing up and hurrying past him.

"What's wrong with **_you_**?" Eli asked with a raised eyebrow, "It wasn't that much of a collision."

"Nothing."  
"Is crying for no apparent reason a French thing then?"

"No, and I'm not French, I just live there. Are all Durmstrang students impolite and obnoxious?"

"I know you're not French Rose," Eli said ignoring the jab, "I did in fact live a few doors away from you remember? I also went to Hogwarts with you before we both decided to leave."

"You know strangely enough I always forget that," Rose snapped, opening an airing cupboard in the hope of finding a towel, "Maybe the experience was just too unpleasant."

"And I'm the obnoxious one here?" Eli asked his eyes turned to loathing, "You know what Rose; you're just as pathetic as James. I thought moving to France would bring you class and manners, but clearly I was wrong. Enjoy the rest of the party sobbing to yourself up here." And with that, Eli stormed down the stairs to join the others.

Rose growled and grabbed a tea towel, slamming the cupboard door shut and marched into the bathroom again, only when she got there, Lily Evans was staring avidly into the mirror chewing on her lip.

"Oh," Rose said surprised, coming to a halt, "Sorry, I didn't know anyone was-"  
"Don't worry about it," Lily smiled, whirling around to face her when she saw her reflection standing behind her in the mirror. Rose stared at Lily; she must have been washing her dress for quite some time because a large purple bruise had appeared on Lily's cheekbone and her eyes were slightly bloodshot from tears.

"Looks like it hurts," Rose said, nodding at her bruise.

"Its fine, I've got ice," Lily replied holding up the towel James had given her, "Are you ok?"

"It was just punch," Rose shrugged although she knew that Lily was really enquiring as to why her eyes were slightly red and puffy, but she wasn't going to answer that; it was far too embarrassing.

"Is erm...is James downstairs?" Rose asked; Lily must of thought she was really stupid still asking for him when it was so obvious that he only had eyes for her.

"He's in the garden I think," Lily replied, "He might have come in by now though; it's cold outside."

"Right," Rose nodded, "Well I'm...I'm going to go downstairs now." And with that Rose hurried out of the bathroom, wiping the rest of the black gloop from her eyes; she didn't need to dress up anymore, especially seeing as she had been wasting her time with it before. Lily never wore make-up.

**_Author's note: Ok I realise that this story might be moving a little slow but I'm trying to make this realistic here and not making her just throw herself at him after claiming to hate him for so long lol But I hope you like the climax to the build up when it comes. Yes it's all planned out this time unlike the others XD As always PLEASE REVIEW xxx_**


	10. Teary Truths

**James**

James poured himself another Fire Whisky when he re-entered the kitchen in order to warm himself up still occasionally reaching to touch the patch of skin that had been lucky enough to come into contact with Lily's lips. Suddenly Eli stormed down the stairs jumping a little when he saw James standing in the kitchen clearly not expecting him to be there at all.

"You sure have a way with girls James," Eli spat looking slightly uncomfortable.

"What do you mean?" James asked after swallowing his mouthful.

"Not only have you managed to punch Lily in the face but you've also managed to make your little date cry."

"My...date..?" James asked dumbfounded.

"You know, Rose Marshall? The girl you claimed to like before?" Eli said spitefully.

_**Rose is crying?**_

"She's not my date..." James said, a horrible feeling slowly filling his insides. With that Eli breathed a disbelieving laugh.

"You really have no idea about anything do you?" He said before heading into the crowded room through the door of the kitchen, leaving James alone and confused. Oh no, what had he done? He hadn't meant for this night to go so completely wrong. Well, at least he'll have something to tell Sirius when he comes back.

James sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose; now that he thought about it, he was being extremely unfair to Rose. He knew she liked him and he had lead her on. That was wrong.

_**James, you're a complete prat. **_

Deciding that the best thing to do was to talk to her, James placed his glass back on the counter and headed towards the staircase when all of a sudden, Rose was already standing before him, wiping the rest of her makeup off of her face.

"Oh!" She said when she almost rammed into him and tried to hurry past, "Sorry." But James grabbed her wrist before she could get away and she turned to look at him surprised. It was then that James had noticed that he had never actually seen Rose Marshall without makeup before and to be perfectly honest he preferred it. Her skin was no longer powdery and un-naturally darker than it should be but pale and clear, her eyes looks larger than when they were lined with black and the decision to remove her lipstick had left behind delicately tinted pink lips; he thought she was pretty before but nowhere near as pretty as she was now. He would even go as far as to call her beautiful.

_**Why do girls do that to themselves when they looked so much better without it? **_

"Look, can we talk?" James asked.

"Look I understand," Rose said calmly, removing her wrist from his grip, "It was clear as soon as we had that accident dancing like idiots when you swooped her into your arms and left me sitting there covered in punch. You've never liked me and you're never going to. I've just been a pest, bugging you all this time and no matter how many times you reject me I still keep coming back like that one fly you hate that just won't let you enjoy your picnic. "

_**Wow that sounds...familiar...**_

Was that how Lily felt about _**him**_?

"No Rose, it's not like that at all," James said quietly.

"James you don't have to be nice, I understand. Don't worry I won't bother you anymore-"

"Look, you just....I need to you to understand that it's not..._**your fault**_ that I don't have feelings for you," James interrupted, he felt stuck up saying it but he knew that was how she felt, "You don't drive me away and I don't hate you. In fact I think…I might as well say it, I think you're beautiful. It's just...It's just that I have feelings for someone else...I _**love**_ someone else. And the thing is, unlike you and me in _**this**_ situation, she _**really does**_ detest me. In my situation, it really is my fault."

_**Well…maybe not anymore after what just happened in the garden…**_

"It's not by any chance Lily that we're talking about here is it?" Rose said, breathing a laugh, but this time it wasn't fake and annoying; it was natural, almost inaudible, "This mystery girl that hates you yet you continue to worship her?"

"Yeah..." James nodded quietly, "I'm sorry, Rose. I was being a total utter git to you without even realising. Well no, ok, I did realise but I was just being…oh I don't know what I was being...selfish and…blind I guess…I didn't mean-"

"You know," Rose said shaking her head, "All this time I dolled myself up and tried to make myself more interesting, when ironically you fell for the most natural, normal girl in the entire world."

"You make her sound boring," James smirked trying to make light of this awful situation but he couldn't help but feel as though he was making it worse.

"Oh don't worry," Rose said with a small smile although James knew it was false, "I know otherwise."

"So...are you...ok now?" James asked stupidly, "I mean obviously you won't be_**...immediately**_-"

_**Oh Just shut up James.**_  
"I think I'll manage," Rose said although her smile disappeared, "So I guess all that asking me to dance and getting me a drink was for Lily's benefit then?"

"Oh," James said looking embarrassed and feeling extremely guilty, "Well, no, not exactly. I mean I guess it went that way but I was really trying to fool Eli."  
"Eli?" Rose asked looking baffled, "What's he got to do with it?"

"I knew that if Eli thought I liked Lily he'd tried to steal her off of me…so…"

"So you thought you'd use me as the mouse trap?"

"Rose," James said quietly, his insides writhing with guilt, what had he done? "It might have started out that way at first but you made my situation ten times better instead."

"Liar," Rose mumbled although the corners of her mouth twitched.

"I'm not!" James insisted, "You took Eli off of his high horse by telling him straight out that you don't actually remember anything about him, that you didn't find him amazing like everyone else does, and when I looked like an idiot dancing a dance I didn't know at all, you were there smiling and joking with me the whole way through."

"I guess," Rose smiled but this time it was genuine.

"I really am sorry though, Rose," James said seriously, "I didn't mean to be so horrible, especially to someone who seems to be in the same situation as me. Feeling the same…disappointment."

"I suppose…Rose said quietly, "I _**could**_… let you off of the hook...seeing as you saved my life all those years ago…just this once." Rose smiled sadly looking like she was about to burst into tears and James wanted to do something to make her smile again.

Leaning in, he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"You're awesome Rose Marshall. Did you know that?" James asked.

Rose blushed and giggled as he pulled away although James could tell that he was hurting her and instantly regretted it.

_**I'm such an idiot. I'm just making it worse!**_

Deciding that the best thing to do was to leave her alone before he dug himself an even deeper hole, James decided to back away in order to leave but Rose stopped him once more.

"Thanks for telling me the truth, James," Rose said, managing a small smile, "I knew this day was coming…I suppose it could have been worse." And with that she hurried past him, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand before she disappeared into the huge crowd of people in the main room.

_**I'm such a git.**_

**Lily**

Lily stood with her back against the wall, just out of sight at the top of the staircase as she listened to James and Rose below. So that had been his plan all along? Not to make her jealous exactly but to get Eli off of the scent? Off of his _**property**_? _**And**_ hurting Rose all at the same time! How dare he? Who did he think he was?

This was an all new low for Potter and as soon as Rose left the corridor she was going to give him a piece of her mind…and foot if she got the chance.

_**Right, that's it. **_

"You really are the biggest git in the whole world aren't you, Potter?" Lily snapped as she stormed down the stairs as Rose disappeared into the other room.

"Oh-I-" James stammered clearly shocked that she had been there all the time.

"So was that the plan all along? Get with Rose, get Eli off of the scent, make me jealous, dump her, end up with me instead?"  
"No! It wasn't meant to be like that!"  
"Oh it was; you just didn't _**think**_ of it like that!"

"I didn't think Rose felt the way she did!" James said honestly, "I thought she was just after a bit of fun with me or something! You've seen her with her bucketful of make-up, her sickly perfume, her glitzy clothes; I didn't realise that was all for my benefit; I thought she was the sort of girl that was after everyone!"

"Oh that's charming isn't it, Potter! And another thing! Who said you could decide who I'm allowed to socialise with? How dare you try and keep me away from Eli like you own me, before I'd even gotten the chance to meet him? What if he had turned out to be my soul mate, my future happiness? No, it's ok as long as James Potter's happy! It's a good thing he's not isn't it!"

"You can do better, trust me!" James spat.

"Well not with you!" Lily said furiously.

"Well…fine!" James yelled, clearly hurt by what she had just said.

_**Good…**_

"You know Evans," James said angrily, "Sometimes I wish that I wasn't so bloody in love with you! That I could just chose someone else…like Rose instead, but I can't! Life would be so much easier!"

"I'm pretty sure I'd lose all respect for Rose if she allowed herself to come crawling back to you after you pretty much used her!" Lily hissed, deciding to ignore the fact that James had just used the 'L' word.

"Why is it that she can forgive me but you can't?" James asked incredulously.

"One: because she owed you her 'life' apparently, and two: because I'm not, never have been and never will be in love with you, Potter!"

"But you can forgive Snivellus who called you a Mudblood and has the potential to become a first class death eater?" James said in a very low voice and Lily froze.

"That…is untrue; I never said I forgive him for-"

"Oh but you would if he begged you enough wouldn't you?"

"You don't know anything about that Potter so-"

"No, clearly not, because I can't possibly understand how you could even consider _**Snivellus**_-"

"His name is _**Severus**_, Potter," Lily said angrily, "And if you ever think I'm going to confide in you about anything ever again, like you suggested earlier, then you're completely wrong. Clearly you don't care enough about me to help me with anything!"  
"Weren't you listening, Evans?" James yelled, "I _**love **_you!"

"How can you possibly even begin to feel that way when you can hurt me so easily?" Lily said, hot angry tears prickling her eyes, "You have reached an all time low Potter…" Lily pushed past James but within an instant he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back.

"OK, I admit it; I _**am**_ an idiot. I do stupid things for reasons I can't even understand. I have a stupid sense of humour, I have a one track mind that only lets me see what I want and unintentionally block out what it might be doing to other people. But I _**have **_changed, Lily, from what I used to be, from the type of person I was to Severus, and I would never hurt you or anyone else on purpose. I'd rather die than let the people I care about down. That's why I told Rose the truth; I didn't want to make up another lie for her, even if it would have made her feel better. She deserves more than that."  
"Why didn't you think of that earlier, Potter?" Lily spat, pulling her arm free of his grip and heading out into the garden again.

_**God I need a drink…**_

_**Authors note: Ok so this chapter isn't the greatest but it leads up to what's coming soon and I promise it's far more fluffy and exciting XD As always PLEASE REVIEW xxxx**_


	11. Confession

**Lily**

Storming off into the garden, Lily headed towards the bar where a large group of James' relatives were mingling in the snow sipping on brightly coloured drinks. Breathing out a large puff of wispy condensation, Lily slumped into a barstool.

"Firewhisky please," She mumbled, she needed something strong.

"Get it yourself," Said a flustered looking bartender.

"Sorry?" Lily asked looking confused.

"I said get it yourself," the bartender repeated and Lily blinked slightly shocked at how blunt he was being.

"Oh…o-ok…" Lily said, still rather shocked at how rude he was being and slid off of the barstool, slipping behind the counter and helping herself to a Firewhisky.

"Hey kid, you couldn't get this guy a drink could you?" He whispered to her when she was done, "I'm up to my ears!"  
"Oh…ok sure…" Lily said feeling rather uneasy. Luckily the wizard in question ordered a Flaming Cerulean and after spurting fire into the drink from the tip of her wand she was done.

"You know what? You're good…well at least good enough to look after the bar whilst I go on my break for a bit," the bartender smirked, "Have fun! And do good; my reputation's at steak."  
"Wait what?" Lily asked looking bewildered as she watched in horror as he skipped over the counter and ran into the house in search of food.

"I don't know how to mix drinks!" she called after him but it was too late. How was she supposed to know wizard drinks when she was muggleborn? She hadn't even heard of butterbeer until she had gone on that first trip to Hogsmede which had shocked her friends to a point beyond belief.

_**This is officially the worst party I've ever been to…**_

"One Dragon's Tongue, two Wandtastics, a Firewhisky and a Snitch, please love," Said a rather plump and slightly elderly witch.

_**Come again…?**_

"Oh Merlin," Just as she found the Snitch cordial on a rather dusty shelf, James Potter appeared sitting smugly on a bar stool in front of her.

"Evans what are you doing behind the bar?" He asked looking rather amused.

"Your bloody bartender tricked me into doing his job and I'm still angry with you," Lily said sternly before leaning over the bar, "What's erm…what's in a Snitch?"

"Whoa who ordered that? Expensive taste."

"That woman over-why am I even talking to you?" Lily said, turning her back on him.

"Because you realise that I'm not the mean and nasty git you think I am?" Lily decided not to answer that one.

"Its acromantula venom mixed with Snitch cordial which is like a lemony mixture and a dash of lime juice," James sighed.

"Right," Lily said, concentrating as she poured everything that James listed into long thin glass that curled here and there like a piece of lab equipment.

"Need any help?"  
"Not from you," Lily snapped as she gave a false smile to the witch and handed her her drink.

"I think you do."  
"Well you're wrong."  
"Well then you can make the others by yourself then," James smirked, "Oh and when you're done make me a Phoenix Fatale. It's very easy. It's basically phoenix tears and apple and raspberry cordial mixed with a little Firewhisky and stirred with a heated wand of thirty degrees until it turns into a liquid that varies between red and gold. Oh and you have to stir it the right amount or else it will curdle and-"  
"Just get behind the bar, Potter."

**Rose**

Rose sat alone in the corner of the hall, in her stained ball gown, watching solemn faced as couples continued to spin on the now somewhat sticky floor after their little incident. In her hands she held what looked like a bowlful of punch the glass was so big. She didn't really know what to do with herself now that she finally had to come to terms with the fact that she'd never be with James; she just had to find a way to get over him. Sighing, she watched as Quinn and Matt gently pressed their lips together as they swayed slowly on the dance floor.

_**This is officially the worst party I've ever been to…**_

"Enjoying yourself?" came an unpleasantly familiar voice and Rose turned to face Eli looming over her with a drink in his hand.

"No," she replied bluntly.

"Why is that?" He asked plainly.

"Why do you think?" Rose spat, standing up and heading into the deserted kitchen but to her dismay Eli followed her.

_**What the hell does he want?**_

"I thought you'd be having fun after having James stuck to you like a leech all night," Eli said bluntly.  
"But he hasn't has he?" Rose said miserably, "He's been pretending to so that you'd leave him alone and wouldn't go after the girl he really wanted."  
"Well that worked out well didn't it?" Eli smirked and Rose lost her patience.

"Do you know something?" Rose said, whirling around and advancing towards him, "You are the most annoying, miserable git I have ever met and it's your fault I'm as miserable as you are!"  
"What?" Eli yelled flabbergasted, "What did I do? And what do you mean by 'miserable'?"

"If it wasn't for you, James would never have done what he did!" Rose yelled, "And come off it, no one's _**naturally**_ that nasty; something's bothering you and I want to know what it is!"  
"You really want to know?" Eli asked, his eyes suddenly smouldering.

"Try me."  
"Fine," Eli said, slamming his glass down on the kitchen counter, his dark hair falling into his eyes, "All I hear all the time is James, James, James! _**My **_parents talk about him, _**his**_ parents go on about him, and as soon as I spoke to Lily it was all about _**James**_. And then there's you. _**'Oh James is so good at this…' 'James is so good at that…'.**_What about me? I've tried all my life to be as good as James but even when I exceed at what he's done it still doesn't compare! And do you know what's funny? I don't want any of it! I don't want to be the world's greatest auror or the most amazing seeker! The only thing that I _**do**_ want that he has, but ironically that he _**doesn't want**_…is you."

"…I'm sorry, what?"  
"Are you really going to make me say it again?" Eli said quietly, almost pleadingly.

"I…don't understand…" Rose said stupidly.

"I met you long before James fished you out of that river," Eli said solemn faced, "You just didn't find me interesting enough to remember. You still don't; you said it yourself earlier this evening that you remained clueless as to anything I've ever done. No I met you long before. I lived on the same street as you and I never plucked up the courage to talk to you. When I finally did it was too late; you had met my _**brilliant cousin**_."

_**Why don't I remember any of this?**_

"I tried everything to make myself more interesting, more like him to make you want me instead but it still didn't work. I hated James because of it. And then we went to Hogwarts and James met Lily and I hoped you'd give up. I couldn't understand why you wouldn't even when it was obvious that he liked someone else…but then you could have said the same about me."  
_**This is too unreal…**_

"And then you left Hogwarts and just left me there...and to be quite honest that felt like utter crap. So much so that I had to leave for Durmstrang, somewhere completely different where nothing would remind me of you. Strangely enough though everything still does…" Eli stopped then, lifting his eyes to meet hers and he smiled softly. It was weird to see him smile without anything nasty or menacing about it.

"I always dreaded I'd never be able to tell you any of this," He said quietly, "It's quite refreshing really."

"Well…that was…not what I expected at all," Rose said quietly.

"It still doesn't change anything though does it?" Eli said sadly, "You still want James…there's nothing I can do about it, even now when he's hurt you."

"I…James just…wait, hang on a minute!" Rose said suddenly, "If you liked me then why were you so mean to me earlier? Why did you make little sarcastic remarks and rub the fact that James had run off with Lily in my face?"

"Why do you think?"  
"It's not one of those schoolboy things is it?" Rose asked with a raised eyebrow, "Like how boys pull girls hair or push them over when they like them."  
"Not…exactly," Eli said looking a little embarrassed, "Let me explain…"  
Rose braced herself for the worst.

_**Authors note: OK I hope you like this sub-couple, I hadn't originally intended it to turn out like this until I was trying to think of a reason why Eli was out to get James so much and I had already brought Rose into it. The fact that Eli liked her before she turned into a 'Barbie doll' for James also let me give Rose another layer which I liked cos it explained why prim and proper Eli liked someone who was apparently as annoying as Rose. Anyways I hope you liked it XD The next chapter will have some more of Lily and James behind the bar and bits form Eli's POV :P As always PLEASE **_


	12. Through Eli's Eyes The Story So Far

**Yesterday Morning**

**Eli**

Eli groaned internally when his aunt opened the door, James appearing solemnly behind her and his stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch. He hadn't seen his cousin in years, not since he had left Hogwarts for Durmstrang for...personal reasons. He was as bloody good looking as ever with that messy hair of his that he never had to style yet it still looked like it had and those glasses that made him look sophisticated and intelligent. He hated that fact that it was all so effortless. He wouldn't be here if he could get away with it; his parents would never forgive him if he missed another one of the Potter's Christmas parties, it had almost been seven years.

"Hi!" Eli beamed, trying to disguise his misery as his aunt swooped him into a bear hug.

"How's your mother?" She enquired.

"Yeah she and dad are good. They're still visiting my dad's relatives but they'll be here tomorrow for the party."

"Oh good. How's school been?" She asked and Eli's grin spread.

"It's different, being in another country but not everyone gets accepted so I'm grateful," He smirked, his eyes focusing on James. His cousin may have the looks but Eli had the determination, and he was determined not to fall into the shadow of his cousin...like he had before.

"I couldn't do it personally," James retaliated and Eli's stomach turned; he always had an answer for everything, "Being miles and miles away from your family; I like coming home."

"Is that why you never applied?" Eli asked innocently; another jab insinuating that James simply wasn't good enough. One good turn deserves another after all.

"Yep," James said casually, "I'm a family man." How could he retaliate to that? It was the perfect answer.

_**Mr Perfect Potter as always...**_

"Just like his father," James' mother beamed, clearly oblivious to the tension, "Speaking of which, I'm going to go help him decorate the dining room; James will help you out with your stuff Eli."

"Thanks Aunt Mary," Eli said politely as she departed before turning to James. God he wanted to bring him off his little podium.

"James." It was a polite greeting but not one typical of a relative.

"Eli," James nodded.

"Still Gryffindor seeker?" Eli asked. Quidditch was James' passion, his weakness; it was a way he could really get to him.

"Yes," James said curtly; it was working.

"We should play," He suggested, "Although it would clearly be an unfair match, after all the Westgate Winged Horses have players for the England team in the world cup."

"I suppose you're aiming for that next," James said, ignoring another jab. Eli nodded.

"Say, didn't _**you**_ want to play for England one day?" He asked. He wanted to turn James into an animal, frothing at the mouth with rage and jealousy; he wanted a fight to satisfy the hurt within him. What made Eli even angrier, even more determined was that he had taken Rose away from him without even trying, discarding her like a used bit of tissue paper. How could he do that to _**her**_?

"I thought about it once," James replied coolly, "But then I decided that being an auror was a much nobler job than a seeker." Another one of James' passions, and another angle Eli had tackled.

"Did you know I've been recommended for the undergraduate auror programme?" Eli asked innocently.

"I do now," James replied coldly, "Eli, why don't you let me take your stuff upstairs? It's better than the both of us trudging up there." Eli flashed James a false smile and handed him his suitcase.

"Good idea," He smirked and left James in the hallway already planning his next move. He would never forgive him for taking her away from him.

Eli stood in the guest room staring at his reflection in the mirror, adjusting his royal blue Victorian jacket. He really, really didn't want to be here and the arrival of his parents had made things even worse. He hated that they boasted about his accomplishments, the only person he really wanted to boast to was James and that wasn't necessarily because he was proud of his achievements, he just wanted to make him feel as jealous and heartbroken as he had. Rose Marshall was supposed to be _**his**_; he just knew it. He'd always planned, when he's first laid eyes on her to meet her, to pluck up the courage and say a simple hello, but no; James had gotten there first hadn't he? He'd gotten there first after Eli's several failed attempts at getting her attention and played the part of Prince Charming, saving her from the jaws of peril and literally whisking her off of her feet.

Ok, he had to stop thinking about it...but he couldn't really. He couldn't stop thinking about Rose Marshall no matter how hard he tried. Even after not having seen her for almost seven years, living in a completely different county, he just couldn't stop and he hated it as much as he hated his cousin; his first and only love was Rose Marshall, no matter how hard he tried to find someone or _**something**_ else.

Eli groaned and exited the guest room just wishing he could go back to Durmstrang when he heard James and his aunt speaking in hushed voices in James' room.

"It doesn't hurt to take pride in your appearance James," He heard his aunt hiss, "Is it because Rose likes it like that?"

Eli froze. Rose? What Rose? It couldn't be Rose Marshall, why would James style his hair the way Rose Marshall likes it? She infuriated him didn't she?

"Fine..." James sighed, "Rose like's it messy alright?" Alright, he couldn't take this anymore. He needed answers. James hadn't given in had he? James and his Rose weren't an item were they? He wouldn't be able to take it if she appeared on his arm at the party.

"Rose?" Eli asked, suddenly bursting in without thinking, "Rose Marshall?"

"Oh, sorry love I didn't know you were...me and my big mouth," James' mother said guilty and Eli's heart sank. Why would she say that? Was it a secret? Did James have feelings for Rose?

"It's nothing," James said hastily, looking shocked.

_**This cannot be happening!**_

"I'm going to see if the food's ok," James' mother said quickly before escaping James' room.

"You like Rose Marshall?" Eli asked raising an eyebrow, trying to stay calm but his hart was thumping wildly in his chest, "Rose Marshall that went to our primary wizarding school and left Hogwarts for Beauxbatons a couple of years ago?" Had James been seeing Rose whilst Eli has been in Durmstrang? Were they sending love letters? Did they have a song, a poem, a place, a joke? He needed to calm down; he was getting ahead of himself.

"No," James said edgily.

_**Oh Merlin, he does like her. **_

"I thought you found her annoying?" Eli asked, trying to remind him of the way he used to feel about her.

"I just said that I didn't like her!"

"Sounded pretty convincing with your mother," Eli said with narrowed eyes.

"Yeah well..." James said, struggling for an answer, "It was joke; I was being sarcastic."

"You said it pretty seriously,"  
"What, do you _**want**_ me to like her or something?" James said apparently struggling for an answer. This didn't make any sense! Eli shrugged trying to be indifferent and James threw on his short, bottle green, Victorian jacket, avoiding his gaze.

"Look, I'm going downstairs," James said quietly, "I can already hear people down in the entrance hall."

"Is she coming?" Eli asked suddenly before he had the chance to leave. What if she was coming? It will be the first time he'd have seen her for almost seven years. He had often imagined her beautiful; long dark hair, big bright blue eyes, it almost hurt to think about it.

"Who?" James asked stupidly.

"Rose," Eli said plainly half wishing he's say yes and the other half no.

"Yeah..." James said quietly, "You won't tell her will you?" Hold on, was James confessing? He'd never normally do that. In fact he was pretty sure if not definite that James would never tell him who he was interested in. Could James be lying? Why would he do that? He'd have to play along.

"I thought you said you didn't like her...and you think I'm that _**bothered**_ enough to tell her?" Eli huffed raising an eyebrow, "Who you like is your business, James."

"Why couldn't you have thought that earlier before you started asking questions?" James said with narrow eyes.

"Having an inquisitive mind isn't a crime James," Eli spat, trying hard not to panic with the prospect of Rose Marshall in a stunning ball gown twirling around the dance floor in James' arms, "You could say those who ask more are far more intelligent." And with that, Eli pushed past James and stormed down that stairs with his heart thudding like crazy. Rose was coming; he could hardly contain the fear, excitement and longing locked up tight in his chest. He was going to see her for the first time in almost seven years.

Freezing at the bottom of the staircase Eli pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath; he needed to compose himself before he made an idiot of himself. Suddenly the doorbell rang and Eli backed up a few steps as his aunt entered the hallway to open the door before he resumed descending the staircase; he didn't want it to look like he'd been moping around for ages.

"Mary!" came his mothers familiar voice as a cold draught entered the hallway and Eli's heart sank even further; it was going to be even harder trying to cope with the arrival of Rose Marshall when his parents were going to be hanging around.

After finally ditching his somewhat emotional mother after having made excuses every holiday in order to avoid coming home only to bump into a no longer single Rose Marshall, Eli grabbed a champagne glass off of a nearby waiter and swallowed the contents whole; God he was nervous. However, his racing heart was strangely soothed by the sight of James dancing with his other cousin Quinn and not Rose; she couldn't have been here yet.

"Eli!" Came his uncle's merry voice and Eli turned reluctantly to face him, he couldn't help but feel slightly awkward towards him for looking so much like the cousin he despised, "My God I haven't seen you in years! We didn't get a chance to speak properly yesterday; how have you been?"  
"Good, thanks," Eli replied as politely as he could, "You?"  
"The usual," His uncle retorted, "Things with me aren't nearly as exciting as you; I hear you play for the Westgate Winged Horses! How's that going for you?"

"Yeah it's a lot of fun," Eli said with a small smile.

"I'll bet!" His uncle laughed, "What position do you play?"  
"Seeker."  
"Oh just like James!"

"Yes, just like James…"

"Well it would be interesting to have a play off wouldn't it?"  
"Very interesting."  
"Yes, well enjoy the rest of the party won't you?" His uncle smiled, patting him on the back, "If you'll excuse me, I see an old friend I must catch up with!" Eli nodded and his uncle darted over to a rather sheepish looking couple, their daughter making Eli do a double take, for there she stood in a floor length green dress and her vibrant red hair pulled back into a pretty butterfly head peace; absolutely stunning. But it wasn't her looks that fascinated Eli; it was the way James was looking at her, and the way Quinn was grinning all too knowingly. She wasn't the only one who knew what was going on. From the short few months Eli has spent in his first year and Hogwarts, it was enough to recognise the girl as Lily Evans, the only girl Eli knew James to be obsessed with.

Eli pulled his gaze away from the pair and back to the girl talking animatedly with his uncle and placed his empty champagne glass back onto the platter of a passing waiter.

Suddenly there was a loud shriek as a sparkling figure darted roughly past Lily, calling out for none other than Mr Perfect James Potter. James emerged slowly from the parting crowd, turning gingerly to face her only when she'd become his tight fitting, glittering, blue belt, making it extremely hard for James to find something to hug.

"OH I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!" the girl squealed and Eli's mouth went bone dry as his eyes fell upon Rose Marshall for the first time in seven years. She was as beautiful as he had expected. She was no longer the girl that he had blossomed a schoolboy crush on, the crush that had developed into a little something more by the time he was eleven; she was taller and curvier with long dark curls and a shimmering blue dress to match her big blue eyes. Her long eyelashes crushed tightly together as she squeezed James' waist with great strength and fury rose in the pit of Eli's stomach. Why should James have Rose's affections when he's obviously still only interested in Lily? And why did he tell his mother and confess to Eli himself that he had feelings for Rose? Was he confused because he had feelings for the both of them, or was this a plan to make the other jealous? Eli smirked impishly; he intended to sabotage that plan immediately.

Taking care to avoid staring too much in the direction of Rose and James, Eli made his way towards Lily Evans and grabbed another glass of champagne off of a passing waiter.

"Oh aren't they adorable?" Eli heard his aunt whisper to her husband, linking arms.

"Match made in heaven," Lily said with a somewhat satisfied smirk as she took a sip of champagne.

"If you say so," Eli said bitterly and the girl turned to face him.

"Why do you say that, Eli?" asked his aunt.

"He doesn't really like her; I know he doesn't, even if he says he does," he said with a curled lip.

"James said he likes Rose?" the girl asked looking slightly confused.

"Oh...well...it was meant to be a secret, Eli," his aunt said quietly.

"Well if he's going to do something about it why should it be a secret?" Eli snapped but he forced himself to calm down.

"Well that's what I thought, it's not like James to keep it all in; he's been after..." Lily said but stopped abruptly and Eli smiled internally; he knew exactly what she had stopped herself from saying, and it was all he needed to confirm his thoughts; James still liked Lily.

"After what?" Eli asked with a raised eyebrow, playing along.

"Oh...nothing," she said quickly, "It's just I've known him since he was eleven and when he erm...likes someone he can be very forward." Clearly Lily didn't recognise Eli; after all the only reason he'd remembered Lily was because of his cousin's infatuation.  
"Is that so?" James' father grinned, looking rather nostalgic about something.

"He never told me he's liked other girls," James' mother said taken aback.

"Well he wouldn't would he, seeing how good a secret keeper you are," James' father laughed and his wife gave him a stern look.

"I don't believe we've ever met before," Eli said with a raised eyebrow, playing along "Unless you've changed beyond recognition, I don't think I've ever seen you at a previous Christmas party."  
"This is my first one," Lily explained, "Mr Potter and my father are old friends reunited."

"Oh...well then I'm Eli, James' cousin," Eli smile, holding out a hand and Lily shook it in return.

"Lily Evans," She smiled, "James'...friend."

"Well would you like another drink Miss Evans?" Eli smirked and offered his arm to her, "My aunt and uncle spent a fortune on the bar so I think it best to get absolutely..._**sozzled **_out of respect."

Lily laughed politely and took Eli's arm as he led her out of the room and into the garden, delighted to see that James was staring after them as Rose nattered on beside him.

"It tastes like sherbert and rose water..." Lily said curiously as Eli blindfolded her with his hands as she sat on a barstool in the snow; his uncle had cleverly charmed all the socialising areas into being warmer than the weather, "Ok I give up, what is it?"

"It's called a Flaming Cerulean," Eli smiled removing his hand, "It's very popular in Durmstrang."

"So you go to Durmstrang then?" Lily asked, stirring her drink with the liquorice wand.

"Yeah, he loves it so much he doesn't come home for the holidays," James cut in before Eli could respond and he was so delighted in seeing that Rose had followed that he ignored his cousins remark about avoiding his family during the holidays.

"Excuse me _**Potter**_ but we were having a descent conversation before y-"Lily began but she was shortly interrupted.

"Not Eli from primary wizarding school?" Rose asked and Eli's heart sank

"Yes," Eli said miserably disappointed that she hadn't notice his progression into Hogwarts with her as well as James, "I _**did**_ _**actually**_ go to Hogwarts with you before we both left for different schools, Rose,"

"I don't remember that..."Rose said looking puzzled and Eli's jaw tightened as he tried to hide the terrible pang of pain in his chest as she broke into a fit of giggles; a sound Eli had deeply missed.

"Rose love, drink?" James asked and Eli ground his teeth as Rose was suddenly positively glowing with the fact that he'd called her _**love**_.

"Sherbert and rose water you say?" She asked Lily and she nodded, "Whatever she's got then please, James."

"It's called a Flaming Cerulean," Eli said quietly after she'd completely tore his heart from his chest.

"Aren't you going to introduce us, James?" Lily asked as the barman handed him another Flaming Cerulean and a Firewhisky.

"Oh right," James said through his mouthful.

"Lily this is Rose Marshall, Rose this is Lily Evans," Eli cut in before James could swallow his drink, desperate to remind Rose of his existence, "Rose is someone James and I have known since childhood, Lily is one of James' friends from school...and as of tonight one of mine."

"Careful Lily," James said bitterly as Eli notice the smile Lily was giving him, "Turn round for more than ten seconds and your little _**friend**_ will already be back in Bulgaria."  
"Cleary my departure from Hogwarts to Durmstrang has traumatized you cousin; I didn't know you missed me so much," Eli smirked in an attempt to show James that his words were ineffective when they made his insides squirm with hatred.

"Eli, just because the party's Victorian themed doesn't mean you have to talk like you're actually from the nineteenth century," James snapped.

"I'll think you'll find its called class James, I don't suppose you've heard of it?" Eli retorted, his tempter slipping.

"If classy people practically disown their parents then I think I may have misunderstood the term."

"Oh don't be so dramatic I haven't disowned my-"

"Tell me, do you enjoy telling them you're not coming home for Christmas every year, do you look forward to it?" Eli swallowed hard; that was a low blow. If only he knew the reason for not returning home…if only _**Rose**_ knew; things might have been a little different.

"James, stop being such a prat," Lily snapped and Eli was delighted to learn that her hatred for him had remained intact all these years.

"Well I haven't seen him since seventh year either," Rose interjected, defending James.

"And why would you want to see me?" Eli asked curiously both hurt and hopeful by the fact that she had noticed his absence from Hogwarts and from home.

"I was just making a statement."  
"Tell me; is this an interrogation or a Christmas party?" Eli asked incredulously, now frustrated that she seemed indifferent to his disappearance; she clearly couldn't care less if she never saw him again.

"Feeling guilty now are we, Eli?" James smirked.

"James, shut it," Lily spat.

"Actually James, my parents know that it's been in my best interests that I've stayed in Bulgaria over Christmas; if I hadn't I wouldn't have gotten to where I am today," Eli lied.

"And what is that?" Rose asked and Eli felt another terrible pang in his chest; all his efforts to make himself better than his cousin, all his efforts to impress her had been pointless.

"You mean you haven't heard of anything he's done? He boasts about it often enough," James asked incredulously.

"What _**have**_ you done?" Lily asked curiously.

"Everything," James growled under his breath and he thought for the corners of Eli's mouth lift with satisfaction; at least he had completed in getting at James.

"I'd rather not boast," He said quietly to Lily although he would have love to reveal all the impressive things he had done to Rose.

"Oh come off of it!" James laughed in disbelief.

"Well you seem to know a lot about it James, why don't you tell me?" Lily asked with a satisfied smirk, taking an innocent sip of her drink and Eli felt like giving her a hug; this girl was going to be a good friend of his, he could tell.

Just as James was about to retaliate the sound of live, classical music drifted out into the garden and Eli interrupted him.

"Lily, I don't know about you but I'm rather bored of this conversation, clearly my cousin doesn't have anything remotely interesting to say; would you join me for a dance?"

"Oh that's a good idea!" Rose said, laughing inappropriately and Eli felt a flutter of hope and excitement again.

"Well I did actually ask Lily but-" Eli started rather taken aback and Rose laughed louder.

"I didn't mean you silly, I meant me and James!"

"Right," Eli said in a monotone voice, as she tore his heart from his chest once more, "Lily?"

"What?" James said slightly stunned, "Oh I dunno Rose I'm not...the best."

"Oh pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase, James? It'll be fun I promise!"

"Will it be fun?" Lily asked Eli under her breath.

"If he likes her as much as he says he does it should be," Eli said quietly so as Rose didn't hear, staring at James with loathing.

"Let's go then," Lily said hooking his arm and without a second thought James gave Rose his answer.

"Ok then let's go," He said, doing the same and Rose squealed with joy; it was obvious to Eli now what James was doing, and he didn't like it at all.

Eli and Lily lined up beside James and Rose and within minutes the music had started, and Eli was bowing before her. From the corner of Eli's eye he watched as James suddenly lurched forward with clearly no idea what he was doing causing Rose to burst into another fit of tinkling laughter.

When Eli straightened he took a step forward and placed his palm against Lily's but his mind was elsewhere as Rose whispered softly into his ear and his stomach lurched with jealousy.

Suddenly James stumbled with inexperience and rammed into Eli causing him to thread his fingers through Lily's in order to keep his balance and pulled Lily into his arms as he left her slip from his grip.

"Perhaps you should have learnt your left from your right before you decided to ask Rose to dance, James," Eli spat as James steadied himself and Eli squeezed tighter. To his surprise, Eli felt Lily's head rest against his chest and James hurriedly turned away, averting his gaze. Feeling awkward by the way Lily had reacted, Eli suddenly released her and joined the group of men on the other side of the room.

"Having fun?" James asked with a patronizing smile and Eli smiled back at him.

"Lily Evans is fun," he jabbed, knowing full well that James had seen her press against him, "Shame I hadn't gotten to know her better before I left Hogwarts. Strange, I thought she was more _**your**_ type. I half expected _**her**_ to be draped round you, not Rose Marshall."

"Funny how things turn out isn't it?" James muttered.

"Oh come off it," Eli snapped, "I know you don't like Rose Marshall."

"Oh yeah?" James advanced, "How do you know? When do you see her? When do you talk to her?"

"I don't have to talk to Rose to find these things out, James," Eli spat jealously, "Talking to your little friend gave me all I needed. You're bluffing."

"What are you talking about?" James asked.

"As soon as I heard you talking about Rose I knew you had to be bluffing. You've never been interested in her before so why should you choose now, after not having seen her for years? I knew you were lying but I couldn't understand why until I spoke to Lily, quite accidentally as it happens. I was talking to your parents actually until she decided to join in, she said very briefly that she knew what you were like, pursuing other girls."  
"So what if I've liked...other girls," James said sounding a little intimidated.

"Well that's the thing," Eli smirked satisfied, "If you've liked other girls since Rose left Hogwarts, how could you possibly fall for someone you never see and hardly keep in contact with? It doesn't make sense; especially seeing as you had no romantic interest in her before. So then I was confused, why would you want to make both myself and your parents think that you'd fallen for her? Simple; it was a distraction."

"Get to the point, Sherlock," James said but clearly his confidence had faltered, "She was coming to the party, I knew that much, so it had to be a distraction for someone at the party, someone you really had feelings for. I didn't know who that person was...until I met Lily that is."

"And why should it be Lily?" James asked casually.

"Try because she's the only one at the party you could possibly have feelings for beside Rose, unless you plan to tell me that you practice incest or have an attraction towards half-trolls...it was just a case of finding a stranger within a room of people I already knew."

"So you were using her, all this time just to get at me, to get me to tell you the truth?" James asked angrily.

"Just like how you used Rose so that I wouldn't steal her off of you," Eli said with narrowed eyes, "And, look how well that worked out."  
"Why do you do this?" James demanded, "Why do you deliberately go out of your way to make me feel like crap?"

Eli shrugged his expression stony; how could James _**unintentionally**_ make him feel like crap so easily?

"I can't help it if I'm better than you, James," he snarled running off the adrenaline his anger had given him, "You watch, I'm sure Lily will agree with me by the end of tonight."

To Eli's surprise James swung for him and he hurriedly moved out of the way. With a scream Eli watched as Lily hit the floor and slid from Matt's arms in a heap, causing Rose and her partner, who had been close behind them to stumble and send Rose crashing into the table full of punch.

"Jeez what's going on?" Matt yelled, dropping to Lily's level.

"Lily!" James cried and bent down to the floor.

"Get away from me, you idiot!" She cried, clutching the side of her face as he heaved her into his arms.

"My dress!" Rose cried as Eli rushed over to her and pulled her up, threading his fingers through hers and wrapping his arms around her waist. His heart leapt excitedly in his chest as he pulled her close to him, pretending to help her keep her balance but she pulled away far too soon.

"What happened?" asked Lily's father.

"Is she hurt?" Eli's mother asked, standing behind him

"Nice going, James," Eli smirked, his heart aching.

"Let go of me! Put me down, Potter!" Lily squealed as James carried her outside. From the corner of his eye Eli saw Rose run from the room, heading for the hallway and his heart sank. Ok so maybe he was forgetting something; even though he was enjoying the fact that he was making James' party a nightmare for him and that he'd had to whisk Lily away in an attempt to fix the mess he'd made, Rose Marshall had feelings for James just as much as Eli had for her.

"Is Rose alright?" Eli's mother asked as she stared after her, "She slammed into that table pretty hard."

"Yeah I know," Eli asked biting his lip, although he knew it wasn't her side that was hurting right now, "I'll erm…I'll go see if she's ok." Eli hurried from the hall and stepped into the hallway and began climbing the staircase, stopping only when he heard a faint sobbing coming from the bathroom. Sighing, Eli pinched the bridge of his nose. What was he doing? And more importantly what was James doing? What was he _**going**_ to do? He wanted to make it all better but he had no idea how. He wanted to tell her everything, from when he was just a kid with a crush to how strongly he felt about her now. About how it had been her that had forced him to leave Hogwarts for Durmstrang to get as far away from everything that reminded him of something he couldn't have. He wanted to tell her that even if James would never love her that he always had and most probably always will.

Suddenly Eli heard the running water in the bathroom stop and he hastily ascended the rest of the stairs as Rose stepped out into the hallway and their bodies collided.

Why is everyone around here so clumsy?" Eli snapped, straightening out his jacket. He had no idea why he was being so cruel to her but it had been an instant reaction to coming into contact with her; perhaps it was just the nerves.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking," Rose snapped, standing up and hurrying past him.

"What's wrong with _**you**_?" Eli asked with a raised eyebrow, wishing that he was able to drop the act, "It wasn't that much of a collision."

"Nothing."  
"Is crying for no apparent reason a French thing then?"

"No, and I'm not French, I just live there. Are all Durmstrang students impolite and obnoxious?"

"I know you're not French Rose," Eli said ignoring the jab but this time he was angry with her, how was it that even though they had been near enough friends during childhood that she had dismissed his entire existence, "I did in fact live a few doors away from you remember? I also went to Hogwarts with you before we both decided to leave."

"You know strangely enough I always forget that," Rose snapped, opening an airing cupboard in the hope of finding a towel, "Maybe the experience was just too unpleasant."

"And I'm the obnoxious one here?" Eli asked his eyes turned to loathing as a terrible twinge returned to his chest, "You know what Rose; you're just as pathetic as James. I thought moving to France would bring you class and manners, but clearly I was wrong. Enjoy the rest of the party sobbing to yourself up here." And with that, Eli stormed down the stairs to join the others angry with himself at how badly his attempt to comfort Rose had been and the fact that there were tears of hurt and frustration in his eyes.

Eli reached the bottom of the staircase and bit down on his lip so hard that he felt as though it would burst but stopped instantly when he saw James standing in the kitchen. Hurriedly Eli blinked away the tears before James could see.

"You sure have a way with girls James," Eli spat.

"What do you mean?" James asked after swallowing his mouthful of firewhisky.

"Not only have you managed to punch Lily in the face but you've also managed to make your little date cry."

"My...date..?" James asked dumbfounded.

"You know, Rose Marshall? The girl you claimed to like before?" Eli said spitefully almost sick with envy.

"She's not my date..." James said looking uncomfortable and with that Eli breathed a disbelieving laugh.

"You really have no idea about anything do you?" He yelled angrily before heading into the crowded room through the door of the kitchen before the hot sting of tears filled his eyes once more.

Eli poured himself a firewhisky from the re-positioned punch table that had ruined Rose's dress and downed each glass one by one; he had never felt so miserable in his entire life. The girl he was hopelessly in love with hated him and now he was forced to watch all the stupid happy couples dance to the soft classical music playing in the background. Eli groaned miserably as he caught sight of Quinn and Matt as they gently pressed their lips together and swayed slowly on the dance floor; they had no idea how lucky they were that they had found someone who felt the same way they did. As he poured himself another glass, his attention caught the sparkly blue mess that was Rose Marshall in the corner supporting an overly large glass of punch in her hand looking just as miserable as he felt. Taking a deep breath, Eli decided to try and make things a little better between them and made his way over to where she was sitting.

"Enjoying yourself?" He asked when he had finally reached her.

"No," she replied bluntly.

"Why is that?" He asked plainly.

"Why do you think?" Rose spat, standing up and heading into the deserted kitchen but Eli followed her, determined to at least be on speaking grounds.

"I thought you'd be having fun after having James stuck to you like a leech all night," Eli said bluntly, taking another swig from his drink. If Rose had stuck to_** him**_ like a leach like James had her he would have been ecstatic.  
"But he hasn't has he?" Rose said miserably, "He's been pretending to so that you'd leave him alone and wouldn't go after the girl he really wanted."  
"Well that worked out well didn't it?" Eli smirked and Rose lost her patience.

"Do you know something?" Rose said, whirling around and advancing towards him, "You are the most annoying, miserable git I have ever met and it's your fault I'm as miserable as you are!"  
"What?" Eli yelled flabbergasted. _**He**_ was making _**her **_miserable? Did she have any idea at all that she was tearing him apart? That she had forced him to move away because he was simply too miserable having to watch her crawl after his perfect cousin? "What did I do? And what do you mean by 'miserable'?"

"If it wasn't for you, James would never have done what he did!" Rose yelled, "And come off it, no one's _**naturally**_ that nasty; something's bothering you and I want to know what it is!"  
"You really want to know?" Eli asked, his eyes suddenly smouldering, the alcohol taking over. He'd always wanted to tell her, why not now when he had nothing to loose and had a little too much Dutch courage?

"Try me."  
"Fine," Eli said, slamming his glass down on the kitchen counter, "All I hear all the time is James, James, James! _**My **_parents talk about him, _**his**_ parents go on about him, and as soon as I spoke to Lily it was all about _**James**_. And then there's you. _**'Oh James is so good at this…' 'James is so good at that…'.**_What about me? I've tried all my life to be as good as James but even when I exceed at what he's done it still doesn't compare! And do you know what's funny? I don't want any of it! I don't want to be the world's greatest auror or the most amazing seeker! The only thing that I _**do**_ want that he has, but ironically that he _**doesn't want**_…is you."

"…I'm sorry, what?"  
"Are you really going to make me say it again?" Eli said pleadingly, it was bad enough having to confess his embarrassing, stupid feelings to her in a situation like this but having to say it again was just rubbing salt in the wounds.

"I…don't understand…" Rose said stupidly.

"I met you long before James fished you out of that river," Eli said solemn faced, "You just didn't find me interesting enough to remember. You still don't; you said it yourself earlier this evening that you remained clueless as to anything I've ever done or the fact that I've actually attended the same wizarding school as both you and James. No I met you long before. I lived on the same street as you and I never plucked up the courage to talk to you. When I finally did it was too late; you had met my _**brilliant cousin**_. I tried everything to make myself more interesting, more like him to make you want me instead but it still didn't work. I hated James because of it. And then we went to Hogwarts and James met Lily and I hoped you'd give up. I couldn't understand why you wouldn't even when it was obvious that he liked someone else…but then you could have said the same about me. And then you left Hogwarts and just left me there...and to be quite honest that felt like utter crap. So much so that I had to leave for Durmstrang, somewhere completely different where nothing would remind me of you. Strangely enough though everything still does…" Eli stopped then, lifting his eyes to meet hers and he smiled softly.

"I always dreaded I'd never be able to tell you any of this," He said quietly, "It's quite refreshing really."

"Well…that was…not what I expected at all," Rose said quietly.

"It still doesn't change anything though does it?" Eli said sadly, casting the glass aside "You still want James…there's nothing I can do about it, even now when he's hurt you."

"I…James just…wait, hang on a minute!" Rose said suddenly, "If you liked me then why were you so mean to me earlier? Why did you make little sarcastic remarks and rub the fact that James had run off with Lily in my face?"

"Why do you think?" Eli asked; perhaps it was the pain she had caused him earlier, or perhaps the panic he endured every time he was alone together or lucky enough to have touched her. It didn't matter now; it was ok, he could tell her everything, everything including today and why things had happened the way they did. Perhaps she would even remember the things he'd tell her seven years from now.

_**Author's note: Ok so I know this is a VERY LONG chapter but I got bored and had the sudden urge to put this story in Eli's POV just for fun seeing as I didn't like him much to begin with, then gave him a love interest and then felt sorry for him. I thought even though it's not essentially all about Lily and James I'd put it up here anyway to sort of sum up what's happened so far seeing as I haven't written in ages (sorry XD) /just for fun /to show the somewhat sweeter side behind the nastiness and I promise that the next chapter will be ALL ABOUT Lily and James. I hope you like this chapter and I'm writing the next Lily and James bit as we speak so I'll post again soon. PLEASE REVIEW as always XD xxx**_


	13. Twenty Galleons and A Headpiece Later

**Lily**

"Trust you to hire a dodgy barman, Potter," Lily sighed as she poured another cocktail into a long twisted glass and handed it to what looked like a female troll much smaller than average size. Both she and James had been behind the bar for an hour or so and the rush of thirsty guests had caused Lily's hair to fall out of her butterfly headpiece and stick out in certain places.

"What do you mean dodgy barman?" James asked as he slid yet another glass along the counter top.

"Well I wouldn't be happy if I hired a barman who got my guests to do all the work."

"Aren't you enjoying our little quality time, Evans?" James asked as he poured a purple liquid into another glass.

"You're not forgiven if that's what you mean," Lily said stony faced as she shot fire on top of an acid green liquid under James' instructions.

"Not even after I helped you behind the bar?" James asked, making his eyes extra large.

"It's not a joking matter Potter," Lily said as she handed an elderly wizard his drink.

"What will it take then?" James asked as he edged closer, "Even Rose forgives me much easier than you do, Evans."

"Yes well that doesn't make what you did ok," Lily retorted, taking a step back.

"You know, I wouldn't have to act like an idiot anymore if you just went out with me…"  
"James…"  
"Can't you just give me a chance?" James asked as he stepped closer causing Lily to take another step back.

"I'm not sure you deserve one."  
"I've changed, Evans, really."

"No James, you really haven't," Lily said as she took another step back and backed into the bar wall, noticing that for the first time in an hour the guests had left them completely alone in James' garden.

"I have!" James retorted, taking a step closer, leaving Lily wishing she had more space to move, "The old James wouldn't have told Rose the truth."

"Telling the truth is one thing," Lily said as she pressed against the wall; James was getting a little close for comfort, "Being a complete git _**before**_ telling the truth is another."

"_**You're**_ the reason I turn into a git," James said quietly, now mere inches away.

"Is that supposed to be a compliment?" Lily asked, desperately trying not to show that James being so close was making her very uneasy.

"Do you want one?" James asked in a low voice as he gently pulled the disobedient red locks that stuck out at odd ends, making them long sausage curls as they became free of her headpiece, "I could easily give you thousands."

"Shut up, Potter," Lily scowled, "You've messed up my hair now."  
"I can fix that," James smiled and he pulled the headpiece from her hair before she could stop him.

"Give it back, Potter!" Lily said angrily as she tried to grab the headpiece from him but he held it out of her reach.

"That's better," James smirked as he draped her hair over her shoulders, "You don't need to tie your hair back to make it pretty, Evans." Lily scowled and angrily tried to slap his hands away but instead James grabbed her by the wrists and pulled them away from her hair, bringing their faces alarmingly closer together as he did so. Lily tried to wriggle out of his grip feeling extremely uncomfortable, but James' hold was too firm.

"Let go, Potter," she tried but she froze as she felt his breath gently tickle her neck and she turned her head to face him, their lips centimetres apart.

"I'm not giving in if that's what you think," She whispered, but whether she was telling James or convincing herself she had no idea.

"Did I tell you how beautiful you look this evening, Evans?" James whispered his eyes fixed on hers.

"Nice try, Potter," Lily tried to say spitefully but it sounded too hesitant, more like a question.

"It's true," James said in low voice, "I've wanted to tell you all night but you've been angry at me for most of it. But now we're alone, and even though you're probably still angry at me, I can tell you that you look very pretty tonight, Evans…but I much prefer your hair loose."

"Well…thank you…I suppose," Lily whispered, not quite knowing what to say. Within minutes the two had frozen, simply staring at each other and for one very strange moment Lily even thought about closing the small gap between them to avoid the awkwardness.

"Do you know what the worst part about liking you so much is, Evans?" James whispered, his eyes lowering to focus on her lips.

"What?" she asked anxiously. Any minute now James was going to kiss her and she didn't really know how she was going to respond. She could both push him away and make a hasty escape or she could just let it happen…and for some reason the latter seemed much more appealing. It was strange that a few minutes ago she had been so sure of her hatred for him and, now that it seemed very likely that he was going to kiss her, she was perhaps even excited by the idea. It was true that earlier this evening he had been sweet and comforting towards her when she had talked about her situation with Tuney, but then he had been so mean to Rose earlier…

_**Urgh this is so frustrating!**_

"The worst part is that by doing something I've really, really wanted to do for a very long time, I would make you even angrier at me. And whilst it would quite possibly make this the best day of my life, it would disgust you."

"And what is this_** something**_, exactly?" Lily asked quietly.

"I think you know," James replied in a low voice and within seconds he was closing the gap between them and Lily was holding her breath, her heart beating faster than it should have been; but just as her eyes fluttered to a close the somewhat disobedient bar tender had returned and interrupted before their mouths could meet.

"I'm back," he announced, "You got my twenty galleons kid?" Lily watched as James' eyes scrunched up tight and he bit his lip as the words escaped the barman's lips; it only took a few minutes for her to understand why James was looking so guilty.

"You paid him to abandon me behind the bar didn't you?" She asked outraged.

"Only for an hour, just so you'd stop being angry at me!"  
"Oh and I'm not angry now?"  
"You wouldn't have spoken to me again for the rest of the night! I wanted to have the chance to speak to you!"  
"My twenty galleons?" the barman asked looking rather aggravated and Lily slipped under James' arms and out of the bar.

"Evans? Evans! Lily, wait!" James called after her, but she wouldn't answer.

"Thanks a lot mate," she heard James grumble as he handed the barman his twenty galleons and jumped over the bar. In truth Lily wasn't really all that angry at James; she was more concerned with the fact that she had almost kissed him…_**willingly. **_Making her way into the hall and as far away from James as possible, Lily spotted her mother behind the waltzing crowd of people and squeezed between them in order to reach her.

"Oh, Lily sweetheart! Are you alright now after your little incident?" her mother asked as she drew near.

"What? Oh yeah I'm fine," Lily replied as she touched the bruise underneath her eye having completely forgotten about it after what had just happened with James.

"It looks like it hurts," her mother said looking concerned, "Do you want some ice for it?"

"Its fine mum, I've had some," Lily answered, waving it away, "Are we going home soon?"  
"Aren't you enjoying yourself?"

"Well yes…" Lily lied, "I'm just a little tired."  
"Well the Potter's have offered us a couple of rooms' if-"  
"I'd rather go home," Lily replied a little too quickly.

"Well…I'm sorry sweetheart but your father and I have already accepted," her mother replied looking guilty.

"But I thought-"  
"Well we're not doing anything on Boxing day and your father's having a great time catching up with the Potters…we just thought I'd be easier than driving home in the snow."  
"I could have apparated," Lily said, trying not to sound angry.

"Well yes but its not exactly the most comfortable way to travel and definitely not my favourite…"

"Right," Lily said quietly as she caught sight of her father sharing a joke with Mr Potter, "So we're staying here until tomorrow then…definitely?" Lily's mother nodded.

"What happened to your lovely butterfly thing?" she asked, suddenly realising its absence and smoothing down Lily's hair.

she'd give anything to just disappear into the floor and hide from the sheer embarrassment of almost giving in to James Potter.

"I erm…took it out when I accidentally got hit in the face," She lied, "It just felt more comfortable without it."

"Lily!"  
_**Oh please no…**_

Lily turned just in time to see James squeeze through the mob of dancers and stand in from of her, holding her butterfly headpiece in both hands.  
"Hi," Lily said in a somewhat flat, monotone voice.

"I erm…it's just that you forgot this," James said politely, handing her the headpiece as Lily's mother gave Lily a he-looks-like-a-nice-handsome-young-man look; clearly James understood by the look in Lily's eyes that she would rather not have him meet her mother and that it would be best to just disappear as soon as possible, "Well I better-"  
"James Potter I assume?" Lily's mother asked and Lily's heart sank.

_**Too late…**_

"Yeah," James smiled sheepishly.  
"Wow you look so much like your dad," she smiled, "I'm Jane Evans, Lily's mum."

"Oh, hi!" James blushed, and Lily almost laughed at how nervous he seemed to be meeting her mother, "Are you erm…enjoying yourself?"

"Yeah it's lovely," Lily's mother smiled, "My husbands enjoying himself so much catching up with your dad that we've decided to stay for the night."  
"Oh really?" James replied and Lily felt the heat rise in her face at the clear excitement in his voice. Lily's mother nodded and glanced over at her daughter.

"Lily said she was feeling a bit tired. You wouldn't be able to show her somewhere she could stay would you?"  
"Mum!" Lily said shocked and her mother gave her that all too knowing look.

_**Great now my mum's trying to set us up!**_

"Yeah that's fine," James said as he turned to face Lily, hiding his grin from her mother, "I can show you to your room."

"No, it's fine, really," Lily said through gritted teeth but James took her arm and led her on anyway. Lily turned and shot a glare towards her mother who winked and gave her the thumbs up thinking that she'd done them a favour by giving them a chance to be alone.

_**It's times like these when I wish I was adopted…**_

_**Authors note: Sorry if this seemed a bit rushed but I really wanted to get this finished before I go away for two weeks. I'll be writing whilst I'm away though so I should be able to put some new chapters up when I get back! XD As I promised this chapter was all about Lily and James and I'm sure the next one will be too after she's been forced to stay there for yet another day poor girl XD As always PLEASE REVIEW and I hope you liked it : ) xxx**_


	14. Elillybeth Bennet and The Note

**Lily**

"Why didn't you tell me you were staying, Evans?" James asked as they turned the corner, clutching Lily's arm tighter as she attempted to wriggle away now that her mother could no longer see them.

"My mum decided to spring it on me minutes before you arrived," Lily said miserably, still trying to free herself from James' arm, "I found out pretty much the same time you did. Oh will you let go?"

"And disappoint your mother? Never," James grinned, holding her tighter, "It is my duty as a gentleman to find a suitable room for you."  
"I'd be much happier with the couch," Lily grumbled miserably.

"I'm afraid that wont do for the Potters; we like to spoil our guests," James smiled as they ascended the staircase, "Besides, you haven't even got anything other than that dress, and I doubt that's comfortable to sleep in, so it looks like you're going to have to-"  
"Potter if you think that I am going to take off this dress and sleep in your house with no clo-"  
"Exactly what I was getting at, which is why I think we should take a slight detour and find you some sleepwear," James smirked as Lily glowered at him, "What did you think I was suggesting, Evans?"  
"I swear if you even try anything whilst I'm here-"  
"Evans, I'm a sensible, well mannered young man and I wouldn't do anything my lady friend wouldn't want me to," James said raising his palm before his facial expression changed completely, "Anyway my parents would kill me if they found out I did anything in the house…and it would be weird knowing they'd be around if-"  
"Well don't even think about it Potter because I wouldn't touch you with a barge pole," snapped Lily before James could even finish suggesting such a thing.  
"Says the girl linking arms with me," James grinned and Lily rolled her eyes, "Seriously though, Evans, you can trust me."  
"Yes, clearly I can trust the boy who secretly pays a barman to abandon me behind the bar in order to get me alone for an hour," Lily scowled, "You wasted those twenty galleons seeing as my mum did it for free."

"I still think it was worth it," James said quietly, "I'd pay twenty galleons for every hour of my life it meant you were constantly in it, Evans."  
"If that was meant to be sweet you just made me sound like a live-in prostitute," Lily snapped. She knew she was being difficult but she just wanted to find a room, climb in to bed, hide under the covers and try not to have nightmares about wanting to close what had been that very _**very **_small gap between herself and James' lips.

"Urgh, see?" James moaned, his arm growing limp and sliding out of hers, "I can't say anything right when you're around! It just comes out all wrong and I make myself look like an idiot and it's because I make myself look like an idiot that you hate me!" Lily winced and lowered her eyes to the floor, regretting the remark she had made; she didn't really want to upset James, she was just confused.  
"I don't…_**hate**_ you, Potter," Lily hesitated, trying to sound convincing; _**she**_ didn't even know how she felt after tonight's events.

"Oh come off it," James grumbled, "You think I'm a bully, touching me disgusts you and most of the time you wont even look at me…you're not even doing it now! You're looking at the floor!"  
"Maybe I'm looking at the floor because I'm not one for eye contact!" Lily spat suddenly, meeting his gaze now that he had drawn attention to the position of her stare, "Or maybe it's because this conversation is making me very uneasy. Or maybe the floor is just very interesting…neither one of those reasons amount to me hating you; you just assume too much."

"Well it's hard to _**assume **_anything else when you made it so painfully obvious from the moment you walked through the door that you'd rather be anywhere else, with anyone else rather than here with me," James said sadly.

"I…" Lily began but she really didn't know what to say; she couldn't exactly tell him that he was wrong, she had instantly assumed the moment she had received her invitation that tonight would be unbearable. And touching him didn't disgust her; it frightened her.

"Look just…I don't really…ok fine I'm sorry, alright?" Lily stammered, "I suppose I was a little prejudiced about how this evening would pan out but you can hardly say I was wrong when you've spent the entire evening arguing with your cousin and making another girl cry…not to mention punching me in the face."

"Yes but I didn't mean for those things to happen!" James argued, "Especially what happened with Rose. And Eli…he's just…" James pinched the bridge of his nose and breathed a laugh.

"From the moment I knew you were coming, all I wanted to do was prove to you that I'm not the git you think I am," he smiled sadly, "And instead tonight has been a total disaster." For a moment silence stretched between them and kept them to their own thoughts and Lily couldn't help but think about what would have happened in the bar if the bar man hadn't turned up, not to mention what had been said in James' garden after she had received her black eye.

"Not a total disaster," Lily insisted giving a small smile, breaking the silence, "You listened to me go on about Tuney…"  
"I guess," James said, clearly still downhearted.

"And…it's not _**completely **_over until I leave tomorrow," Lily said, her smile spreading, "I guess I could try and put up with you until then." James smiled softly and for a bizarre moment, the two remained staring at each other in their Victorian clothing, triggering memories of a scene from Pride and prejudiced within Lily before James nodded and continued along the corridor, this time without Lily's arm wrapped around his. Lily followed him in silence with only the soft rustling of her dress for audible company, wondering if it was because Jane Austin had been in a similar position to hers with James that she was inspired to write about Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet. She wondered if perhaps Lily Bennet would have been a more suitable name than Lily Evans for tonight, whilst she was dressed the way she was…or Elizabeth Evans…or even Elilybeth Bennet. But then did that mean James was her Mr Darcy? It was true that they argued the way Elizabeth and Mr Darcy did but James was not nearly as distant and mean as Mr Darcy…however, Lily could be. Sometimes she had been distant and mean to James and she had most definitely been prejudiced.

_**What am I then? James' Mr Darcy?**_

Miss Darcy even.

James stopped in front of a door at the very end of the corridor and snapped Lily out of her bizarre thoughts. It was strange that being dressed the way they were should make Lily compare them both to a famous romantic couple, a couple so clearly infatuated with each other. What was going on tonight?

_**Ok, this is scaring me now. Thank Merlin I'm the only one that can hear me. **_

James twisted the doorknob but it stopped suddenly in mid turn. Lily caught up with James as he tried to open the door again but it froze in the same position.

"My parents must have locked this knowing that Mr 'Stickyfingers' Wiggins was on the guest list," James said finally, "I guess you're going to be stuck in boys clothes for the rest of the evening, Evans."

_**Great, not only will I be in his house, I'll be in his clothes. So much for trying to get away from him.**_

"Believe me, it sounds like heaven after wearing a corset for hours," Lily grinned politely but James only breathed a small laugh before squeezing past her and heading in the opposite direction, leaving Lily to follow him with a furrowed brow.

**James**

_**This has officially been the worst party ever.**_

"And…it's not _**completely **_over until I leave tomorrow," Lily said, her smile spreading, "I guess I could try and put up with you until then." She may have laughed but James knew she wasn't joking about having to put up with him; if it meant swimming home in miles of ice cold water she'd do it just to get away from him. Leaning against the wall, James stared in her direction; she looked so beautiful that his heart sunk so low it was in his shoes. He had really thought that tonight would be the night that he'd prove to Lily that she was wrong about him, that being in his home, his comfort zone, he would have the upper hand.

_**Instead I give her a black eye and call her a prostitute.**_

Realising that he had been staring at her for far too long, James nodded in agreement to whatever she had been saying and strolled along the corridor leaving her to follow. He would have declared that he had officially given up, lost all hope, but he knew that he'd be lying. He'd told himself that a thousand times and every time he still tried to win her over, he still hoped and every time he still crashed and burned as she rejected him again and again. He heard Lily follow him, her dress rustling behind, and James hated that dress for doing what he thought had been the impossible in making Lily Evans ten times more beautiful than she already was. Making his way to his parents' room in search of something for Lily to wear, James thought about looking for something hideous in his mother's wardrobe to dress her in but perhaps it would be too obvious that he was trying to make her as unattractive as possible if he did so.

James finally reached his parents room and turned the doorknob only for it to stop suddenly when he turned it. Automatically James tried it again but he knew too well that the door was locked.

"My parents must have locked this knowing that Mr 'Stickyfingers' Wiggins was on the guest list," James said finally, but his heart sank a little; Lily was going to have to wear something of his and he knew that that was most definitely not going to help him in his quest to get over her when he'd probably have it stashed somewhere secret and never wear it again after she had.

"I guess you're going to be stuck in boys clothes for the rest of the evening, Evans," he said finally.

"Believe me, it sounds like heaven after wearing a corset for hours," Lily grinned but James only breathed a small laugh before squeezing past her and heading in the opposite direction. If he was going to have to give her something of his it meant that he had to take her to his room and that worried James. His room was his place, where he went to escape; if Lily went in there even _**that**_ would remind him of her and he'd have nowhere left hide. It would mean she'd have taken over his house, his room _**and **_his school and if that happened there'd be no hope.

As James neared Sirius' room, he hesitated, wondering if Sirius had left anything behind that he could dress Lily in, but he knew all too well that Sirius had taken everything with him and James had no choice but to give her something of his. Finally reaching his own room, James' heart pounded in his chest; as soon as he opened the door she would be absolutely _**everywhere**_.

"Um…I guess I could find you a T-shirt or something," James mumbled as he opened the door and stepped into his bedroom.

"As I've said before, so much better than a corset," Lily said with a somewhat awed expression as she looked around his room. Feeling slightly uneasy, James made his way to his wardrobe and opened the door, catching a golden snitch before it could fly away.

"You have a snitch?" Lily asked as she perched on the end of his bed, "Don't the school check it's there before the holidays are over for next season?"

"They have a new snitch for each game," James explained, "That snitch was the snitch from my first game and the first one I caught. It remembers who caught it and belongs to them from then on."  
"Wow," Lily exclaimed as James put it back inside a red pouch.

"Dumbledore doesn't normally let the seekers have them until they leave Hogwarts but after the fifty times I tried to steal it he saw how much I was attached to it," James shrugged.

"Is that why you're so good at it?" Lily asked, "Because you have your own to practice with?"  
"I suppose," James said, "Although it always stays at home. I always nick the one in the Hogwarts trunk to practice with." James rooted around in his wardrobe until he found what he was looking for; a long red Westgate Winged Horses T-shirt miles too big for him that Quinn had bought him as a joke after claiming that he was eating far too many pumpkin pies last year; it would be the perfect substitute for a nighty seeing as Lily was already much smaller than James.

"Here," James said sheepishly, handing it over.

"Thanks," Lily replied and once again the room fell into silence.

_**Well this is far too awkward for me…**_

"I erm…better let you erm…get dressed," James said suddenly.

"Yeah, thanks," Lily giggled as James hurried from the room trying not to think about the fact that Lily Evans was going to be half naked in his room any minute now.

**Lily**

As soon as James closed the door, Lily dropped the shirt onto James' bed and took a proper look around the room whilst she had the chance. As soon as she had walked into the room it had been quite obvious that this was not a muggles room and this had fascinated her instantly. The deep blue paint which coloured James' bedroom was barely visible underneath all the posters, newspaper clippings and Quidditch programmes that were pasted to the walls complete with moving photographs of many witches and wizards. Above her head was a floating golden orrery with a tiny golden wizard on a broomstick continuously zooming in between and around the planets. As Lily neared the articles on the walls she realised that a lot of them were about Quidditch world record accomplishments but vast majority of them were based on James' favourite Quidditch team, the 'Westgate Winged Horses', however, articles on this team soon stopped short on the 22nd of November of last year for a reason unknown. The posters on the walls consisted mostly of Quidditch players zooming around a Quidditch pitch and Seraphina from James' favourite band 'Seraphina and the Trolls', wearing less-than-sophisticated outfits, blowing kisses, playing with her hair and winking at whoever gazed upon her photo.

On James' bedside table was an autograph book that Lily guessed was once again full of Quidditch players, but was surprised to find that when she opened it up a mini clone of the player belonging to the signature strolling along the pages, reciting their own personal message to James. In the corner of the room lay a pile of books that Lily assumed were text books but as she drew near there was one book that was thick, black and slightly tatty looking; a sketchbook.

_**James Potter an artist?**_

Intrigued, Lily opened the book to find a moving, very realistic sketch of yet another wizard playing Quidditch. Lily laughed and shook her head; this was clearly all James thought about. As Lily turned each page, admiring the hidden talent James appeared to have kept for many a year, one particular drawing made her stop. There on a clean, crisp piece of paper placed carefully within the book…was her.

Lily took in a sharp breath in surprise at how life like it was. Her black and white copy sat on the edge of Hogwarts lake completely engrossed in the novel she had been addicted to a few months ago, ribbon thread through long thick plaits; her favourite casual hairstyle. In complete awe, lily watched as her charcoal twin turned a page and grumbled something incoherent as an autumn breeze blew the pages and her plaits into a frenzy. He must have done this when she hadn't been looking.

"Evans, are you done?" came James' voice and Lily almost squeaked in surprise.

"Uhh…in a minute!" she said in a slight panic, trying not to make it obvious that she'd been rooting around his room, "I uhh had a little trouble with the corset!" Hurriedly Lily dived across the room, accidentally knocking over James bedside table.

_**Crap!**_

"Umm…are you ok?" James asked nervously.

"Yeah I'm just a klutz!" Lily called back, cursing herself for sounding so stupid. Hurriedly Lily replaced the draws in the table along with quills, deodorant, men's spray and…a strand of her red ribbon and her writing. Lily froze; it was a note between her and James from class.

_**Evans, will you go out with me?**_

_**Never.**_

_**Why not?  
Stop bothering me in class Potter.**_

_**Why not?**_

_**Does it matter?**_

_**It matters to me.**_

_**Get lost Potter.**_

_**Not until you say why.**_

_**Reason number one: You're a bully. Reason number two: You're constantly making trouble. Reason number three: You think you're the most amazing person in the world. Reason number four: you're not exactly romantic about asking me out, which leads to Reason number six: You're a coward. Reason number seven: You only think of yourself. And reason number eight: you destroyed my relationship with my best friend…Reason number nine: I will never ever forgive you for that Potter. **_

_**I'll make it up to you.**_

_**Golden reason number ten: You never know when to give up. **_

_**Surely that's a good thing because it proves that I mean what I say when I tell you how I feel.**_

_**Reason number eleven: I've just got detention for passing your stupid note.**_

Lily stared at her long list of reasons why she had rejected James and noticed that pencil crosses and been passed through all of them apart from reasons number four, eight, nine and ten; finding a romantic way to ask her out, destroying her relationship with Severus, the fact that she would never forgive him and the fact that he never gives up.  
Suddenly James opened the door leaving Lily to remain sitting on the floor, still in her dress, looking guilty.

"What…are you doing?" James asked looking both confused and embarrassed.

"Why did you keep this?" Lily asked ignoring is question, holding up the note.

"Keep what?" James asked stupidly.

"This note from fifth year…"

"Oh," James said blushing, "I erm…I thought you were getting dressed?"

"Potter…" Lily sighed, "Why did you keep this?"  
"I…oh alright," James sighed sitting on the end of his bed, "I…I meant it when I said that I really cared about you Evans…"  
"Right…" Lily said, ignoring the tingling feeling in her stomach and chest when he'd said that; she must have been really, really tired or something.

"So…so I kept all the reasons why you wouldn't say yes and used them to better myself," James said, blushing redder than ever, "For you…"  
"Oh…James…" Lily began, her heart suffering a terrible, wonderful tingling pang, but James hastily interrupted.

"I better let you get dressed for real this time," he said before edging past and hurrying out of his room. Fighting the strange urge to call after him Lily stared at the remaining items of the list that James had yet to cross out, now understanding what it all meant.

1. A romantic way to ask her out.

2. Destroying her relationship with Severus.

fact that she would never forgive him

fact that James Potter never gives up, no matter how hard he has to try and no matter how much he'd already changed for the better.

_**Authors note: So I started writing this on holiday and found myself writing around about five pages which I did NOT expect. Suppose I got carried away XD Anyways hope you enjoy this extremely long chapter and as always PLEASE REVIEW :) xxx**_


	15. The Hypocrites Little Accident

**Lily**

Lily sighed as she placed the note onto James' bed and unzipped her dress. After several attempts at undoing the corset by herself, Lily finally threw on the 'Horses' T-shirt and laughed a little when she saw that it reached just below her knees and was so baggy that she could have wrapped it around her twice. Maybe James had shrank and lost a lot of weight before she had met him.

Neatly rolling her dress into a silky green sausage and placing her butterfly headpiece on top, Lily sat on the end of James' bed and took the note into her hands once more.

_**I can't believe he kept this…**_

Lily stared at all the scruffy pencil crosses and re-read what lay beneath them, casting her mind back to the last time that James had fulfilled those negative descriptions only to reach one conclusion. He had always claimed to have changed and the truth was that he_** had**_ and the evidence was in her hands; why had she taken so long to see it?  
_**Because I'd never given him the chance, that's why. **_

Feeling extremely guilty, Lily waited for James to return, wondering if he'd decided to leave her there to find a room for herself after discovering that she'd shamelessly raided his stuff.

"No, James Potter never gives up," Lily joked to herself, smiling inside and out. This had most definitely been the strangest, most wonderful night of her life and yet she had no reason to declare the latter. What was it that had made her so happy exactly? She already knew that James had a…_**thing**_ for her but then she had had no idea that this _**thing**_ meant a lot more to him than she had originally thought. Ok, so he wasn't just stubborn, he wasn't just interested in her because she clearly wasn't in him…so what was this thing exactly?

"Evans?" came James' monotone voice and Lily automatically straightened up before she tried different sitting positions in order to make herself look more casual.

"Yeah…I'm…I'm dressed!" she answered as she straightened out his bed covers and resumed her position. James opened the door and purposefully avoided her gaze making Lily's heart do a weird little dance in her chest; this was the first time she had ever seen him completely vulnerable.

"You've erm…shrunk," Lily smiled, standing and spreading her arms out like a bird to display the T-shirt on her tiny physique.

"Quinn's idea of a joke," James explained, one corner of his mouth rising to show his concern for his cousins brain mass.

"Well at least we found a use for it," Lily tried, trying to break the awkwardness.

"Yeah I guess…" James smiled, although Lily could tell by the way that he refused to meet her gaze that he was still highly embarrassed about her discovery.

_**Speaking of discoveries…**_

"I never knew you were so talented, Potter," Lily said, hopeful for conversation as James finally made eye contact with puzzled eyes, "In here." Lily made her way over to the pile of books in the corner of the room and picked up James' scruffy black sketchbook causing James to blush once more.

"I never knew you were so nosy, Evans," James jabbed, "Had a proper root around haven't we?"  
"Well I was a little surprised to find something potentially not entirely Quidditch based in here," Lily said defensively; it was her turn to blush now, "And as for the note, it was only because I ran into the bedside table by mistake that the draws and their entire contents emptied out onto the floor and I found it."

"Well you didn't have to read it," James retaliated and it frightened Lily to find that James was looking at her with eyes she had never seen before; for the first time in almost seven years James was truly angry at her.

"Well wouldn't you if you found your writing in my room?" Lily hit back. James didn't answer; instead he snatched the note out of Lily's hands, threw it in its draw and slammed the draw shut.

"There's no need to be so childish Potter," Lily scowled, ignoring the sting of the paper cuts he had just given her.

"Well unluckily for you, Evans, I was born childish!" James yelled suddenly, causing Lily to jump; she'd never seen him so angry before, "I'm childish and stubborn and competitive! My friends and I get in trouble all the time and to be honest I quite like it that way because it's in detention that I actually have some of the best memories, ones that I'll never forget! So I'm dreadfully sorry if it doesn't please you but to be quite honest I don't give a crap!"  
"What…where is all this…where is all this coming from?" Lily stammered, staying on the other side of the room.

"You!" James yelled again causing Lily to flinch, "Ever since I met you all I wanted was for you to want me back but after nosing around my room and finding that stupid note, you've just made me realise that you're no better than I am and it makes me wonder how I've been so obsessed and miserable over such a hypocrite!"

"Excuse me?" Lily asked, now almost shaking with anger, "I've explained to you about how I found-!"

"I'm not taking about how you found the note; I'm talking about what's in the note!" James argued.

"What about it!" Lily shrieked.

"Let's review shall we?" James said angrily, "I believe one of the reasons stated 'You're a bully'. Yes I was a bully, Evans, I admit it, but I stopped and I like to think I've matured since then. It makes me squirm with guilt every time I think of the things I said…but you? You've never stopped hurting me, Evans and sometimes you do it completely unprovoked!"  
"Well I…"  
"That's one!" James interrupted; clearly it was time to just shut up and listen, "Another reason I believe was the fact that I was constantly making trouble…do you realise that it was you that made me do those things?"

"Now wait a second!" Lily began but James interrupted her again and Lily's stomach boiled with anger and frustration.

"I admit it's not entirely your fault, but if you hadn't made me feel like I had to try and impress you because I was quite possibly the most worthless thing on the planet, I wouldn't have done half the things I did!"

"Look I think you-!" Lily tried.  
"Yet another reason was that I think I'm the most amazing person in the world," James snapped, this time moving towards Lily, "Well let me tell you little Miss Perfect that by the way you turn your nose up at me and my friends it appears that you do too!"  
"Potter-!"  
"And then you call me a coward!" James bellowed, this time inches away from her, "How can you call me a coward when you couldn't even rustle up the courage to admit that your little friend is a Deatheater in the making?"

"YOU LEAVE SEVERUS OUT OF-!"

"In fact you waited until he broke you so you didn't have to break him!"

Tears of anger filled Lily's eyes but her chest burned with an unknown desire now that he was so close; perhaps it was to hit Potter several times around the head with something heavy.

"Which comes to my final point!" James said, ignoring the tears streaming down her face, "I only think of myself? What about you? You knew how much I liked you and then you-!"

But before James could finish, a sudden adrenaline hit Lily hard and grabbing his shirt, she stood on her tip toes and their lips crashed together. A sharp noise escaped the back of James' throat in surprise causing his body to go stiff and for one horrible moment Lily thought he was going to push her away with disgust but suddenly James exhaled and his body softened before he grabbed her around the waist and pressed their bodies together. When his mouth opened against hers, a powerful, tickling, painful pang shot through her heart and she melted at the feel of his hot breath on her skin and in her mouth. Together they fell backwards and Lily slammed into the wall, James pressed hard against her as her hands found his messy black hair and she raked her nails through his locks, causing him to tug at her T-shirt tighter. Suddenly realising what she was doing, Lily lowered herself from her tip toes, pulling their lips apart and wriggled out of his arms in shock before she ran to the other side of the room.

_**Oh crap. Oh Merlin. Oh God…**_

James turned to look at her as she folded her arms and stared at the floor, breathing heavily.

"I think you should show me to my room now, Potter," she breathed, barely audible.

_**I have a feeling this conversation isn't over…**_

Authors note: Ok so I know this is a slightly shorter chapter than the rest but then again things did happen a little bit fast and unexpectedly ;) Hopefully I'll get tonnes of cookies for posting fast though yes?...maybe? As always PLEASE REVIEW! :) xxx


	16. Lily's 'Apology'

**James**

"I never knew you were so talented, Potter," Lily said, hopeful for conversation as James finally made eye contact with puzzled eyes, "In here." Lily made her way over to the pile of books in the corner of the room and picked up James' scruffy black sketchbook and James' heart sank. He knew letting her into his room would be a big mistake, already she was unearthing all kinds of secrets and his skin flushed red at the thought of her gazing upon her ink and paper twin.

"I never knew you were so nosy, Evans," James jabbed now completely embarrassed and unsure of what to do with himself; being angry seemed the only option, "Had a proper root around haven't we?"  
"Well I was a little surprised to find something potentially not entirely Quidditch based in here," Lily said defensively; it was her turn to blush now, but unlike James, the flush of rose made her more stunning than ever in contrast to her usually pale skin, "And as for the note, it was only because I ran into the bedside table by mistake that the draws and their entire contents emptied out onto the floor and I found it."

"Well you didn't have to read it," James retaliated, a lump growing in his throat. He didn't want her to discover how truly vulnerable he was in her hands, he didn't want her to know that he'd been attempting to change himself completely in a desperate attempt to win her over but it was too late now; she had seen the crosses on the note and it angered James that she now knew how much power she had over him.

"Well wouldn't you if you found your writing in my room?" Lily hit back. James didn't answer; instead he snatched the note out of Lily's hands, threw it in its draw and slammed the draw shut. He'd make damn sure her green eyes never gazed upon that note ever again. Perhaps it was time to stop trying to fix himself when, in truth, he was perfectly happy with the version he had upgraded to at present.

"There's no need to be so childish Potter," Lily scowled.

"Well unluckily for you, Evans, I was born childish!" James yelled suddenly, causing Lily to jump and it actually surprised him how good it felt to finally give her a taste of her own medicine, "I'm childish and stubborn and competitive! My friends and I get in trouble all the time and to be honest I quite like it that way because it's in detention that I actually have some of the best memories, ones that I'll never forget! So I'm dreadfully sorry if it doesn't please you but to be quite honest I don't give a crap!"  
"What…where is all this…where is all this coming from?" Lily stammered, staying on the other side of the room.

"You!" James yelled again causing Lily to flinch; perhaps it was time to make her feel just as miserable as she made him, "Ever since I met you all I wanted was for you to want me back but after nosing around my room and finding that stupid note, you've just made me realise that you're no better than I am and it makes me wonder how I've been so obsessed and miserable over such a hypocrite!"

"Excuse me?" Lily asked, now almost shaking with anger, "I've explained to you about how I found-!"

"I'm not taking about how you found the note; I'm talking about what's in the note!" James argued.

"What about it!" Lily shrieked.

"Let's review shall we?" James said angrily and with each point he stepped towards Lily, the adrenaline pumping through his veins, building higher and higher every time he blocked her from talking, knowing that he was in control this time. Within moments he was inches away and Lily's eyes were full of angry tears giving James both satisfaction and an immense pain in his chest. But suddenly James noticed a sudden heat in Lily's eyes, a desire, a need, and urge and before James could finish speaking, Lily had grabbed his shirt, stood on her tiptoes and pulled him towards her, their mouths meeting unexpectedly.

A sharp noise escaped the back of James' throat in surprise causing his body to go stiff. This was so bizarre; Lily Evans was kissing him, something he had always longed for…and after he had been a complete git to her. For a few moments, James waited for her to come to her senses, but, much to his delight, he felt her lips part slightly against his and James exhaled, letting his body soften before he grabbed her around the waist and pressed their bodies together.

James obediently opened his mouth against Lily's and cursed himself for being so weak, for there he had been, in complete control, laying down the law…and once again she had him in the palm of her hand.

_**Oh well…**_

This felt far better. His heart pumping with adrenaline once again, James kissed her more enthusiastically and together they fell backwards. Lily slammed into the wall and James pressed hard against her as her hands found his messy black hair, raking her nails through his locks, causing him to grab the handfuls of her T-shirt tighter. Suddenly realising what she was doing, Lily lowered herself from her tip toes, pulling their lips apart and wriggled out of his arms in shock before she ran to the other side of the room.

James turned to look at her as she folded her arms and stared at the floor, breathing heavily.

"I think you should show me to my room now, Potter," she breathed, barely audible and James' heart sank.

_**I knew this was too good to be true…**_

James stayed rooted in his position, half dreamy with excitement and miserable by her reaction whilst Lily stood on the other side of the room staring at him intently.

"Did you mean that?" James asked, dazed, "Or was that just to shut me up?"

"I…" Lily hesitated, biting her lip, "Can't you just take me to my room, Potter?"

"Do you honestly expect me to just let this slide?" James asked, feeling angry again by how meaningless this all seemed to be for her.

"I…it's just…I…"  
"You what?"

"Oh I don't know!" Lily whined, "I don't know the answer! I don't know what's going through my head right now! I don't know why I did it or what it meant, ok? Just…_**please**_ take me to my room and let me be by myself for a while!"  
"Right," James spat, almost shaking with anger and stormed out of his room, leaving her to follow. Marching across the corridor, James grabbed hold of the nearest door and threw it open, displaying behind it a stylish white room with a large four poster bed.

"Here," James spat with a loud voice before continuing sarcastically, "I hope you enjoy your stay!" Then, storming past Lily, James continued down the corridor.

"James…" Came Lily's soft voice and James stopped, surprised to hear it wobble with sadness, "Please don't be mad?" Anger fading, James turned to face a solemn looking Lily in his oversized Westgate Winged Horses T-shirt, and, much to his annoyance, his heart melted. But of course he couldn't let her know that right now.

"Why shouldn't I?" James sighed, more emotionally exhausted than angry, "You know how I feel about you and then you just-" but much to his surprise Eli and Rose appeared at the top of the stairs, forcing him to fall silent.

"Oh," Eli said, looking equally surprised at the scene before him and Lily tried to hide the redness of her eyes by combing her hair with her fingers.

"Erm…Rose is staying the night…we're snowed in," Eli explained finally, "I was told to find her a room."

"Right," James replied feeling awkward; why hadn't Eli jabbed at him already?

"Well we'll just go…" Rose said, giving James a nod of understanding before linking arms with Eli and letting him accompany her past the pair much to the surprise of James.

_**This is most definitely the weirdest night ever…**_

"James…can you just…come in here a second?" Lily asked now that Eli and Rose had disappeared into what she expected was the depths of James' enormous house, "Before anyone else comes up here?" James nodded and followed her into her newly declared room before she shut the door behind him and sat on the end of the bed. Sensing the need for him to sit next to her, James obeyed her silent command and carefully placed himself next to her at a safe distance.

_**Ready for anything…**_

"I know you're most definitely going to be angry at me…" Lily said quietly, "And you have a right to but just…" But before Lily could finish, she had already begun to cry. _**  
**_"Oh look Potter; I just don't know what to say!" Lily sobbed, her voice breaking and James fought the urge to pull her into a tight squeeze and stroke her hair. No, he couldn't do that. He shouldn't do that…so what should he do whilst she sobbed next to him?

_**OK…not quite everything…**_

**Lily**

"James…can you just…come in here a second?" Lily asked now that Eli and Rose had disappeared into what she expected was the depths of James' enormous house, "Before anyone else comes up here?" James nodded and followed her into her newly declared room before she shut the door behind him and sat on the end of the bed. James however, remained standing for quite some time and she worried that she wouldn't have it in her to ask him to sit by her side, but luckily he sensed her desire, allowing her to be the secret coward she felt she was.

"I know you're most definitely going to be angry at me…" Lily said quietly, "And you have a right to but just…" But before Lily could finish, she felt that terrible burning in her eyes and suddenly the tears were spilling again.  
_**Urgh stop crying Lily!  
**_"Oh look Potter; I just don't know what to say!" Lily sobbed and she noticed a hesitation in his eyes sending her insides wriggling with delight at the thought that James might actually want to put his arm around her and comfort her, but she decided to ignore that desire, "I…I've been such a horrible person to you and I didn't e-even know! I had no idea that I make you as m-miserable as you say I do; I never thought you were s-serious about me! It's only after seeing that note and what you said that I u-understand just how much you…I mean what if…what if I've done the same to Tuney? What if I am a h-horrid person who pushes everyone away from me? My sister hates me and now you because I…I don't know what to do with myself or how to t-tell people how I feel about them!"

"I don't hate you, Lily," James insisted immediately, "I thought you would have understood that that's impossible by now."

"Oh sh-shut up, Potter!" Lily moaned; how was it that earlier this evening James had been a total pig and within a few hours he had turned into someone so lovely, even after she'd been absolutely horrid?

"How can you p-possibly-"

"I don't know, I just do," James interrupted, sounding even a little frustrated at himself, "Kind of like how you don't know why you kissed me." Lily's heart sank.

"I'm sorry…" Lily whispered, trying her best to think of something to tell him, "You were just so angry and I've never seen you like that before; I guess I just wanted you to go back to your old self…and it was my way of an apology that just…made it worse."  
"Then why did you say that you didn't know why you did it?" James asked, and it frightened Lily that he sounded doubtful by her excuse, "That you didn't know what was going on in your head? That…that you don't know how to tell people how you feel about them?"  
"Well if I'm honest it was a little more heated than I expected, Potter," she replied, wanting to explain her desire for him whilst keeping it a complete secret at the same time, "I didn't expect to…get like that."

"So…so what would you do if I…kissed you now?" James asked quietly and Lily's heart leapt with excitement.

_**Oh Merlin…why is it that I want him this much?**_

"I…nothing," She lied but she was unsure why when she clearly wanted to do it again.

"So…nothing?" James asked and Lily nodded, "Absolutely nothing?" Lily nodded again, but her heart beat excitedly when James edged closer.

"You're telling me, that the reason you kissed me was to apologise?" James continued and once again Lily nodded, her eyes darting from his lips to his eyes, "And…you're sticking with that story?"  
"Yes," Lily breathed.

"Even though it got a little more _**heated**_ than you expected? There was no reason for getting a little…carried away?" James asked, brushing away a few of her tears.  
"Nope, no reason," Lily whispered, and to her delight James moved in closer, his breath tickling her lips, causing her eyes to flutter to a close but much to her disappointment, his lips simply placed a gentle kiss on her cheekbone.

"Then I best let you get your beauty sleep," James whispered in her ear, his breath tickling and she fought off a shudder, "Apology accepted…" Leaning away, until they were almost face to face, James smiled an all too knowing smile.

"I guess…I'll just have to find something else for you to apologise for," he whispered, before he stood and left Lily in the white room alone with her heart beating madly in her chest. She never thought it would come to this.

_**James Potter is driving me crazy…**_

_**Authors note: So as you can tell the tables are turning! However, I'm writing this at half 11 at night and didn't want to stop because I was in the zone but am worried that when I wake up tomorrow morning and read back what I wrote I'll be like OMG I was most DEFINITELY tired when I wrote that XD But anyway I hope you like it! PLEASE REVIEW as always. : ) xxx**_


	17. Thoughts VS Instinct

**Lily**

Going almost completely mad, Lily tossed and turned in the large four poster bed of the Potter's white room, her cheek burning with the imprint of James' lips. The party had come to an end, and from the mumbling along the corridor, it had become clear that everyone was completely snowed in, making it impossible to even attempt to leave seeing as the Potters lived in the middle of nowhere and the chimney had become temporarily blocked, obliterating the idea of using floo powder.

Giving up with the idea of sleep, Lily stood and made her way over to the window, pulling back the curtains to gaze at the glistening white below and tried desperately to stop contemplating getting herself in trouble so that she could 'apologise' to James again.

"Oh this is ridiculous…" Lily whispered in the darkness, but just as she began to close the curtains, a black figure appeared in the Potter's garden, carrying a broomstick and a tiny, wriggling pouch with him.

_**James…**_

Within that instant Lily's heart leapt and she cursed the fact she wasn't wearing anything warmer in order to join him. Instead she watched with her head in her hands as James released the snitch from its pouch and chased it around his garden in almost complete darkness. Finally accepting that catching the snitch in almost complete darkness was impossible, James gave up and produced his wand, lighting the fairy lights around the garden once more and of course, making it completely obvious that Lily was watching him from her window.

Panicking, Lily pulled the curtains closed and darted over to her bed, hoping that he hadn't seen her, but suddenly, there was a faint tapping. Sighing, Lily made her way over to the door, suspecting it to be someone wondering if the room had already been taken at this late hour, but was surprised to find the corridor pitched black and deserted as the guests finally slept in their own designated rooms. Closing the door, Lily heard the faint tapping repeat itself and she anxiously made her way over to the window, pulling back the curtains only to discover James Potter hovering outside her window on a broomstick. Taking in a deep breath, Lily opened the window as James moved in closer, making her a little more anxious than she should have been as she shivered from the cold.

"You're up late, Evans," James claimed nonchalantly and Lily tried to do the same.

"I heard everyone say that they were stuck here before they went to bed," she exclaimed casually, "I wanted to see what all the fuss was about so I went to see how deep the snow was."

"Everyone went to bed ages ago, Evans," James said and Lily's heart sank, "Can't you sleep?"  
"I get excited about snow," Lily said stupidly, "You don't see it much in this country let alone the town I live in."

"Right," James replied awkwardly, and for a moment, she thought that perhaps her acting was better than she thought it was, "Would you like to get a better look?"

"I…erm…" Lily began, unsure of how to reply.

"The majority of it will have melted by morning," James explained hurriedly before it sounded like he was suggesting something more than just a stroll around the snow, "It's always late at night that you see the best of it."

"Ok," Lily said, her smile growing until her whole face lit up, "I'll just come down-"  
"You can't," James explained before she made her way towards the door, "The snow's blocking the doors…I had to fly out of my window to get down here."  
"Oh," Lily whispered, now suddenly aware of what he was suggesting; she was absolutely petrified of flying on a broomstick. Being a muggle, the idea had seemed so strange to her a first, and after being so used to being strapped in when flying on an aeroplane, she couldn't help but feel unsafe on a simple broom.

"I…um…I dunno," Lily mumbled, but upon seeing the look on James' face, she felt she had to explain herself quickly before he thought that the idea of sharing a broomstick with him had put her off, "I just…flying isn't something I'm good at."

"You won't have to do anything; I'll be with you," James reassured.

"I…I know but…"Lily struggled; she was embarrassed to tell him the truth when he was an amazing Quidditch player himself.

"Look Lily," James sighed, "I won't try anything alright? I just thought you might like to see the snow when-"  
"I'm scared of flying," Lily rushed suddenly before he could continue.

"Oh…" James said rather taken aback, "Well then we won't go very high." Lily leaned out of the window and looked down in order to see how far up they were.

"You promise?" she asked and James nodded. Ignoring the freezing cold, Lily stood on the windowsill as James drew nearer and lowered herself onto his broomstick, with, much to her delight, his arm around her waist to make her feel extra safe.

"What do I hold on to?" Lily asked, feeling a little woozy as she sat sideways in front of James on the broom, wondering how it didn't snap with the both of them on it.

"Whatever feels more comfortable," James answered and a wicked pleasure filled Lily's heart.

"Can I…hold onto _**you**_?" Lily asked, shivering in the cold and James looked her intensely in the eyes and nodded. Shuffling closer, Lily wrapped her arms around James' torso as he manoeuvred his arms around her to hold the front of the broom.

"Merlin Evans, you're freezing!" James shivered as he felt Lily's icy arms wrap around him, "Do you want my jacket?"  
"No it's ok," Lily replied, running off of the adrenaline this experience was giving her, "If I take it off of you, you'll get cold…I'll just do this." And, without waiting for a reply, Lily slipped her arms inside James' coat and slid them along his T-shirt until her arms were once again wrapped tightly around his torso, causing James' body to go stiff again with shock.

"Unless that annoys you?" Lily asked but James didn't answer, instead he looked her in the eyes with that same intense look and shook his head. Shuddering, Lily basked in the warmth of James' body heat inside his coat and the smell of his body spray, not even noticing that they were already nearing the ground.

"It's really deep isn't it?" James exclaimed as he hovered just over the surface of the thigh deep snow.

"Shame I don't have any shoes…" Lily sighed, her arms now warm inside James' coat.

"We could always just…go for a ride," James suggested, "Just around the grounds of course.' This was so surreal; a midnight flight through the snow with James Potter…and she was enjoying it.

"Ok," Lily smiled and clutched onto James tighter as they sped up a little, heading towards a wooded area at the bottom of James' twinkling garden.

"I must say I was surprised that you showed up, Evans," James exclaimed, "I was sure you'd turn down the invitation."

"Well I was hardly going to spend Christmas alone," Lily replied.

"I suppose not," James answered, sounding a little dejected, now knowing for sure that she had been forced to come here and hadn't come by her own free will.

"I enjoyed myself though," Lily added, trying to make him feel better.

"Liar," James smirked, "I gave you a black eye, you were caught up in a love triangle and you had to spend the evening with my cousin."

"Your cousin is actually quite nice if you'd give him the chance," Lily replied and James turned stony faced.

"Yeah I noticed that you two were having a good time," he said miserably.

"What's that supposed to mean?"Lily asked.

"Not only did you let him flirt with you extremely obviously but you both got a little…close on the dance floor," James said, swallowing hard and trying to keep his face expressionless.

"Oh," Lily exclaimed, a terrible sinking feeling occupying her chest when she remembered how she had found Eli extremely attractive on their first meeting and had leaned into him on the dance floor, enjoying herself a little too much, "I…didn't think you noticed that."

"Maybe you weren't exactly lying about enjoying yourself tonight then," James said jealously.

"Oh James, don't be like that," Lily sighed.

"Like what?" James asked.

"Can't we just spend ten minutes together without arguing?"  
"Who's arguing? I'm just saying that perhaps you and Eli would have a nice time in Bulgaria together during the summer."  
"See! There you go again!" Lily snapped, removing her arms from around James torso and folding them tightly in her lap.  
"What!"

"You making snide little comments like that just because you're jealous!"  
"Jealous!" James laughed in false disbelief, "Jealous? Of what Lily? Why should I be jealous? Do I have anything to be jealous of?"  
"Well as a matter of fact, Potter, no you don't, because there's nothing going on between me and Eli!"  
"Well then there you go! I have nothing to be jealous of! So I'm not jealous! I wasn't even jealous in the first place!" James replied, flustered, and for a while the two fell into a stubborn silence, slowly becoming surrounded by a bare frostbitten forest of trees. Lily sighed and squeezed her arms tighter around her torso as the cold night air slowly wrapped around her, forcing James to break the silence.

"Lily if you don't wear my jacket you'll get ill," he mumbled.

"No, it's ok," Lily spat, refusing to make eye contact, "Seeing as I'm suddenly betrothed to Eli, I'll just wear his." Suddenly, Lily felt a hard shove and, much to her surprise, she found herself lying on the ground, completely covered in snow with James hovering over her, almost wetting himself with laughter.

"What was that for?" she asked outraged, standing in the deep, Lily-shaped indent in the snow, shivering.

"You're so serious sometimes, Evans," James chuckled, clutching his stomach, "I just thought you needed a little cheering up."  
"So, in order to cheer me up, you push me off of your broomstick, into the snow?" Lily frowned, "Even after I told you that I hate flying?"  
"Oh come on, we weren't high up," James reasoned.

"No…I guess not," Lily sighed before she grabbed hold of James' leg and pulled him off of his broomstick, "Still hurts though doesn't it?" Lily giggled as James crawled around in his own indent looking for his glasses, but, much to her surprise, she felt a hand around her ankle and found her foot sliding out from underneath her.

"Yes, it does," James grinned impishly over her as he placed his glasses back on his nose, "Thought you were being lever did you, Evans?"  
"Yes!" Lily giggled as she grabbed a hand full of snow and rammed it into James' face before wriggling out from underneath him, but before she could completely escape, James had grabbed her ankle and pulled her back, pinning her down by squeezing either side of her hard with his knees. Grabbing a handful of snow, he held it aloft and his eyes were alight with mischief and his skin flushed from their mini fight, causing Lily's heart to do a strange little dance in her chest; the mysterious urge that had overcome her in James' bedroom had returned.

_**Does pulling him off of his broomstick count as something to 'apologise' for?**_

"Now, now, Evans," James grinned, "I'm afraid this is going to end up in your face if you don't behave yourself soon."  
"That was just payback," Lily panted, lying beneath him in the snow.

"Pulling me off of my broomstick was payback, but a face full of snow is another thing all together," James replied.

"So what now?" Lily asked, trying desperately not to grab hold of his jacket and simply devour his mouth, "Are you going to pelt me with snow?"

"Nope," James answered casually, "But I will if you don't let me teach you how to ride a broom."  
"What?" Lily asked, "Now?"

"Now," James confirmed.

"But…but I'm in a sopping wet nighty," Lily said desperately.

"All the better to try harder so you can change into something dry," James confirmed.

"Can't you just pelt me with snow?" Lily pleaded.

"Nope," James smirked, "Flying is simply amazing, Evans. You'd understand what I mean when you learn how to do it properly."  
"I do know how to do it properly!" Lily protested, now feeling the snow seeping into the back of her nighty, "I just don't like it!"  
"Well I'm the one with the broomstick, and therefore the only one with a way back into the house," James grinned impishly, "Therefore I decide whether and when you can go back to bed, and I'm not letting you back in until im satisfied that you're perfectly happy on a broomstick."  
"Potter you are an utter-"  
"Now, now Evans; its best not to insult someone with a handful of snow," James said, then, standing, he held out his hand and pulled Lily to her feet. Picking up his broomstick that now lay beside his feet, James handed it to Lily who took with without a reply.

"Now what?" She asked moodily.  
"Well first, because you've been lying in the snow, I'm not letting you refuse my jacket any more," James replied as he shouldered it off and held it up for Lily to shove her arms through. Mumbling under her breath, Lily complied and stood in front of James, wearing an oversized jacket, a sopping wet 'Winged Horses' T-shirt that was far too big for anything other than a giant and carrying a broomstick.

"Right," James said, trying not to laugh at the sight of her, "Just get on the broom, Evans."

"How?" Lily asked.

"I thought you said you knew the basics?" James asked, looking smug,

"Well I do!" Lily replied angrily, "I just thought, seeing as you're trying to make me feel more confident on one that you'd be giving me tips."  
"Well just get on it any way you want," James said and Lily did as she was told.

"Comfy?" James asked.  
"I think so," Lily replied.

"Good…now fly."  
"I'm sorry?"  
"Fly," James replied simply, "Don't even think about what you're doing. Just get on it and enjoy it."  
"So…no hints?" Lily asked.

"Lily the reason you don't like it is because you think about what you're doing far too often," James replied, "I can even see that when you're not flying; you do it with just about anything. I suspect that's what makes you good at theory subjects. But when it comes to other things you just need to let go." Even though it annoyed her to hear it, perhaps James had a point. It was true that she was a perfectionist when it came to her work and, even tonight, when she knew all too well that she had somehow…_**grown on**_ James, she was still trying hard to fight it, thinking about it way too much when she wished she could just act on instinct and kiss the stupid boy.

Without a reply, Lily nodded and kicked off from the ground, ignoring the frantic panic of her heart at the thought of how much weight she was putting on the broom. Then, remembering what James had said about thinking far too much about things, she pushed it out of her mind, and instead, focused on the wind rushing through her wet hair as she sped through the sky, smiling a little when snow began to fall upon them yet again. Suddenly, Lily felt the desire to speed even faster through the air as her adrenaline skyrocketed at the realisation of her beautiful surroundings and the fact that it was only herself and James, alone, in a glistening icy forest, with no one to interrupt them. As promised, she acted upon instinct and sped in and out of the trees, not even bothering to fight the laughter that escaped her lips when her fingertips brushed the highest twig in the tallest tree.

"See?" James beamed as she lowered.

"I just want to try one thing," Lily said, her eyes full of determination, "I saw you do it once on the pitch and really wanted to be able to do it myself." Then, without another word, Lily sped up and flung her body around the broom like a Catherine wheel, still seated with the broom remaining still beneath her.  
"HA!" She exclaimed, suddenly and dropped to the floor, her heart positively pounding against her chest.  
"Told you so," James said smugly, "Flying isn't one of those things you have to thing about; you just do whatever feels right."

"Yeah," Lily breathed, nodding gently as she handed James back his broomstick. James smiled and reached out for the broom but found that Lily wasn't letting go. Meeting her gaze, they remained staring at each other for a few short moments without speaking, willing each other to do what they were both longing to do. Then, much to her delight, James moved slowly towards her and Lily did the same, the broom remaining between them. With James' lips inches away, his eyes switched from her eyes to her mouth with a strange, drunken slowness that made her crave for the meeting of their mouths even more. Their foreheads pressed together and their noses brushed, their breath warm and tickling as they slowly and hesitantly closed the gap between them, dropping the broom to the ground when they finally did. James cupped her Jaw and Lily grabbed handfuls of his shirt, the kiss slow and gentle at first before it grew into a relief for the passion both had had to suppress. Soon hands were in hair, nails were raking through black, unruly locks, mouths were opening and closing, tongues were sliding together, material was tugged in handfuls in an attempt to pull their bodies even closer and all thoughts were pushed from Lily's mind.

_**Instinct is such a wonderful thing sometimes…**_

_**Authors note: And so the end is approaching fast and soon! As always PLEASE REVIEW! XD Hope you like this, yet-another-unexpectedly-long-chapter: ) xxx**_


	18. Becoming Official

**Lily**

After what could have been days, weeks, months, or even years, Lily felt herself break away from James, falling from her tiptoes, flat onto her feet again. Not quite sure of what to do next, Lily stood as her hands slid down onto his shoulders, waiting for James' response but was slightly surprised to feel James break away from her completely by removing his arms from around her waist and standing two or three paces away. Lily's heart sank, expecting the worst. What if she had spent too long denying her feelings for him and he'd given up on her? What if she had been too mean to him in the past?

"What?" she asked hesitantly as James eyed her suspiciously.

"I don't know what's scarier," James replied, "The fact that you might slap me after what just happened, or what you must have done for me to deserve THAT apology." Relief filled Lily's chest so much so that some of it escaped her as laughter.

"That one was more of a…thank you," Lily blushed, "For teaching me how to fly."

"You already knew how to fly," James grinned.

"Well yeah but…you gave me the confidence to fly," Lily insisted.

"Not really, I just told you to stop thinking about things so much," James replied, "I'm glad I did…"

"So am I," Lily admitted before suddenly realising how cold she was outside of James' arms. Upon seeing her shiver, James moved towards her and placed his arms inside the jacket she was wearing as she had done to him earlier this evening; squeezing her tight in his arms. Lily shuddered at the warmth of his body heat and rested her head against his chest.

"You're going to get so ill," James chuckled.

"I know," Lily groaned.

"I think its best I get you inside, Miss Evans," James said, before picking up his broomstick. Now no longer afraid, Lily perched herself sideways on James' broomstick and wrapped her arms around his torso to keep her steady. Kicking off from the ground, James flew back through the bare, icy forest and headed towards his house, surprising Lily when he flew past the window to her white bedroom.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"You didn't think I'd let you sleep in a sopping wet nighty do you, Evans?" James asked before he hovered closer to his own bedroom window, "You'd die of hypothermia!" Getting the message, Lily climbed inside James' open bedroom window and waited for James to follow, now beginning to feel the constant need to sniff quite evident as she stood, cold and wet in the middle of the room. James climbed in through the window and tossed his broom to the side; removing a wriggling pouch from his robe pocket, he placed the snitch back into his wardrobe.

"Hmm…what can you wear?" James asked as he tapped the door of his wardrobe, searching for a new outfit for Lily.  
"Anything as long as it's warm and dry," Lily stuttered, pulling James' jacket even more tightly around her.

"Well I have another T-shirt," James shrugged, pulling out a deep blue bundle, "But erm…I don't think it would be…long enough."  
"Well I don't care what else you give me," Lily shuddered, "I'd even wear boxers."

"…Really?" James asked, "Because if you're being serious that can be easily arranged."  
"Really, I don't care," Lily insisted, "They'd just look like a pair of shorts."

"Alrighty then," James smirked, pulling out a pair of black boxers, "Although I'm beginning to think you're just getting a kick out of the thought of wearing my underwear." Lily thumped James on the arm, snatching the clothes out of his arms but smiling all the same.

"Can you…?" Lily asked and James suddenly cottoned on.

"Oh right!" he blushed, before turning around in order for her to get dressed. After seeing James perch himself on the end of his bed and face the opposite way, Lily hastily pulled off her nighty, ignoring the dampness of her bra and threw on the blue T-shirt.

"Can I ask you something, Evans?" James asked as Lily pulled up the boxers.

"Sure,"  
"Are we…you know…?" James asked.

"What?" Lily asked, knowing full well what he was trying to say but wanting to hear him say it himself.

"Are we…together?" James finished, "Are we…official?"

"Erm…well I dunno," Lily grinned as she moved towards him with his back still facing her, "You haven't exactly asked me."  
"Right…do you want me to?" she heard him grin.

"Why don't you just ask and find out?" she insisted cheekily.

"Why is it that the guys always have to ask?"

"Because girls are too stubborn," Lily said, a little frustrated, "So I guess the only way to find out is to ask me."  
"So you want me to then?" James asked, failing to hide his laughter.

"Yes," Lily sighed, giving in, "I want you to."

"Alright then," James grinned, turning to face her, "Lily will you go out with me?"  
"Yes," Lily smiled triumphantly, "Yes I will."  
"Good," James replied, standing, "Although I have officially failed in asking you romantically as written on the list."

"The build up was romantic enough," Lily smiled and James placed his hands on her waist, eyeing her up in his T-shirt and boxers.

"How is it that you can look good in just about anything?" he asked.

"Just a habit," Lily smirked and James chuckled, pulling her closer so that his chin rested on top of her head.

"I'm tired," she concluded wistfully as her head rested against James' chest.

"Better go to bed then, Evans," James replied and her heart sank at the thought of having to wait until tomorrow to see him again.

"Can you…stay with me for a while?" Lily asked against his chest and she heard James' heart beat increase.

"Never thought I'd hear _**you**_ say that," he said, breathing a laugh, "And it saddens me that I have to turn you down."  
"Why?" Lily asked.

"Because Lily, you've been outside in the snow in barely anything and now I'm depriving you of your sleep," James replied, "I don't want you to get incredibly ill because I'm keeping you up."  
"Well…can't we just cuddle in my room then?" Lily said, blushing as she did, "I'll go to sleep, I promise."

"Hmmm…" James thought, "If my parents catch me in your room I'm dead…let's do it." Lily laughed and pulled away to look at his impish grin, her fingers threaded through his.

"I don't want you to get in trouble," she said.

"Lily I get in trouble almost all the time at Hogwarts," James replied, "I'm used to it." Leading Lily by the hand, James opened the door and crossed the hall to the white room, closing the door behind them.

"You're still cold," James sighed as he rubbed Lily's arms. Walking over to the bed, James lifted the cover and gestured for Lily to climb into the bed. Lily smiled and crawled inside, almost sighing with the comfort of its warmth and softness. James placed the covers gently on her and moved to the other side of the bed, lying on top of the covers and edging closer.

"Comfy?" James asked, hugging Lily as she snuggled inside the covers.

"Mhm," she smiled, resting her head on his chest.

"You look like a caterpillar," James said with a boyish giggle and Lily's heart almost burst at the sound of it. Squeezing him tight, Lily smiled softly and her eyes fluttered to a close.

"James?" Lily asked.

"I thought you said you were going to sleep?" James said with a disciplinary tone.

"I just wanted to say something before I do," Lily said innocently.

"Mmm?"

"This is the best Christmas ever."

**James**

James' heart fluttered at the sound of her words. Smiling softly, he wriggled lower so that her head rested on his shoulder and pulled her closer.

"It's the best _**day**_ ever," James whispered planting a soft kiss on her nose, "Nighty night, Evans." Lily grinned with her eyes closed.

"You're such an idiot, Potter," she whispered softly, half asleep, "My dad will be ecstatic that I'm with a 'Potter' regardless of your stupidity."

"I'll be counting on it," James replied, a terrible thought slowly dawning on him, "You haven't exactly told him about…_**me**_ have you?"

"What do you mean?" Lily asked in a voice already thick with sleep.

"About all the stuff I've said…and done," he answered.

"Like what?" Lily yawned.

"Well Sirius, Remus, Peter and I have sort of built a reputation for ourselves by getting detention almost all the time," said a worried James, "And then of course there was that rivalry between myself Severus that you could have told him about. And then there's the fact that I've been pining after you for years and you could have told your dad that I won't leave you alone. And then you could of told him that I'm constantly getting into trouble…to be honest Lily there's plenty of reasons why your dad wouldn't want me to be your boyfriend…" James turned to look at Lily but was surprised to find that she had already fallen asleep. Chuckling to himself, James snuggled closer so that they were nose to nose and played with a lock of her hair, his eyes half closed with content; with Lily asleep he could tell her everything and anything and she would be none the wiser.  
"But then I suppose I could give him plenty of reasons why I should be," he whispered, listening to the comforting sound of Lily's slow, deep breathing, "For example I could tell him that I think you're the most beautiful, intelligent girl I've ever met. I could tell him that I've spent the majority of my teenage years trying to improve myself in order for you to feel even the tiniest bit of what I feel for you, for me. I could tell him that I've rehearsed so many lines in my bedroom that I hoped would win you over that I could probably write a book full of them." James took a deep breath; the twiddling of her hair slowed as he thought back to those darker times.

"I could even tell him that I've become so frustrated with my feelings for you that I've…gotten a little watery eyed," he said slowly, "I could tell him about the number of times Sirius has had to force me to see the brighter side of the situation and stopped me feeling sorry for myself." Lily's breath hitched and James paused in fear of waking her before she resumed as usual. Now confident that she couldn't hear him, James pressed her small frame to his and rested his cheek on top of her head.

"I think I should tell you something, Evans," James whispered, his fingers caressing the small of her back, "I know I can be a bit of an idiot, and I do stupid things just to get your attention, but the truth is…I do all that because…I'm in love with you."

"And I'm in love with you too…" Lily whispered and James jolted a little in shock.

_**Cheeky cow's been awake all this time!**_

_**Author's note: Sorry I haven't written in a while but I thought it was time for some serious mush XD Hope you enjoyed it and as always PLEASE REVIEW! XD xxx**_


	19. Totally Disgusting

**Lily**

"Oh God," Lily moaned hardly able to breathe through her nose. Sitting up, suddenly feeling all the aches in her muscles and her head, she rubbed her eyes looking towards the empty space next to her and her heart sank; she had been hoping James would have been there to comfort her. Groaning, Lily curled up in the bed, feeling the awful pain in her throat when she swallowed, and yet she still managed to smile; it had all been worth it. Being freezing cold and soaking wet for a considerable amount of time could not possibly upset her when she had been spending that time alone with James Potter.

Suddenly the door creaked open a tiny bit and Lily hurriedly shut her eyes, pretending to be asleep in the hope that James would curl up with her again if he found her that way. Instead, much to her surprise, Rose entered the room dressed in what appeared to be an oversized T-shirt and men's pyjama bottoms carrying a tray full of breakfast.

"Lily?" she said quietly as she placed the tray on the table next to her and Lily tried to 'wake up' as convincingly as possible.

"Oh," she croaked innocently, feeling a slight pang of guilt as she sat up; she'd forgotten all about how miserable last night had been for Rose, "Hey Rose…"

"You don't sound too good," Rose said looking concerned, "I suppose that's what happens when you spend most of the night in the snow with just a nighty." Lily's heart sank.

"How did you-?"  
"We kind of saw you," Rose replied guiltily, "Eli and I."  
"Oh…"Lily replied, struggling for an answer, "I-"  
"Its ok, Lily," Rose smiled, "That's why I offered to bring breakfast to you. I just wanted to say that a lot of things happened last night that…made me think about things. You should eat something." Lily did as she was told and poured tonnes of sugar over a sliced grapefruit.

"What kind of things?" Lily asked as she scooped a spoonful out of its skin.

"Well…"Rose hesitated, "I'm not sure if I should…say anything." Lily looked at her curiously but simply nodded not wanting to push for an answer.

"Let's just say that I've come to realise that I never really did love James…I just sort of idolised him after he rescued me as a kid," Rose replied, sitting on the end of the bed, "I didn't want you to feel guilty for having feelings for him."

"That's quite a dramatic change…" Lily said hesitantly, half expecting Rose to murder her when she least expected it for being with James.

"Not a change, more of a…realisation," Rose smiled softly and Lily nodded.

"Rose…" Lily said looking her up and down, suddenly remembering spotting both Rose and Eli in the corridor when she had been talking to James last night, "Who's…PJ's are they?"

"Well they're definitely not James'," Rose blushed.

"Are they…?" Lily asked, holding her spoonful of grapefruit in mid air as it all clicked into place. Eli liked Rose; he always had. That's why he hated James, that's why he had been so keen to dance with Lily; he thought that James had wanted Rose.

"Yes," Rose blushed, "As I said, a lot of stuff changed last night…we discussed a lot last night."

"And…?" Lily asked.

"Well…we've still got a couple of terms of school," Rose explained, "We both plan to move back to England when we finish school so maybe…well we'll see." Rising from the end of the bed, Rose made her way towards the door, turning with one hand on the handle, she smiled at Lily.

"When did you realise that you had feelings for James?" she asked.

"I…I don't know," Lily replied honestly.

"Do you think it's possible to like someone in the space of a day?" Rose asked and Lily had a funny feeling she wasn't just talking about herself and James anymore.

"Maybe," Lily answered, "I believe that some people are just made for each other."

"Maybe I should ask James what he thinks," Rose grinned, "After all he did pull your pigtails on our first day at Hogwarts." Before Lily could even think about what she had said, Rose left the room, leaving Lily with a tray full of breakfast and a head full of questions. She had never really pondered on the exact time that James Potter had developed a crush on her let alone fallen in love with her; in the past she had always been so reluctant towards him that she had never really cared. Could it be possible that he had feelings for her from day one? Finishing her grapefruit and beginning to tuck into her toast, she began to feel slightly better than beforehand, wanting to go downstairs and see James before she had to leave. However, as she swallowed her last buttery mouthful there came a knock on the door and James' head poked around the corner.

"She didn't murder you then?" He said with the lopsided grin Lily adored, "I felt guilty I didn't do a security check with a metal detector before I allowed her to bring you breakfast."

"Get over yourself, Potter," She smirked, picking up her glass of orange juice, "She's actually come to realise that she doesn't like you that way at all."  
"Really?" James asked a little too joyfully as he perched himself on the end of the bed, "So she doesn't actually mind?"

"Unless she lied to me and is waiting outside the bedroom door with a machete," Lily answered, taking a swig of her drink thoughtfully, "Or poisoned my food…"

"So she wont mind of I do this then?" James asked, crawling up the bed and planting a kiss on her nose, "You sound disgusting."  
"Thanks for those kind words," Lily said sarcastically, failing to hide the fact that she did actually enjoy that kiss very much, "So first you try to make me enormous with this huge breakfast and now I sound disgusting?"

"Well seeing as I knew you'd have trouble breathing in the morning I figured your taste buds would be a little messed up so I thought I'd give you a variety.'

"Well that's very thoughtful of someone who normally has a very big head," Lily grinned.

"Stop teasing me, Lily," James whined, lying on his back, placing his glasses on the bedside table, "Don't you think you've tortured me long enough with all this playing hard to get malarkey?" Lily grinned, and then a sudden thought returned to her.

"James, did you…when did you first have feelings for me?" She asked, feeling a little embarrassed asking about it. James rolled his head to look at her, his gaze suddenly soft.

"When do you think?" he asked in a voice that sounded almost thick with sleep it was so heavy.

"Well I don't know," Lily replied, placing the tray on the floor so that she could roll over and lie next to him, "That's why I'm asking. I've never been curious about it until now; I just kind of took it for granted." James watched with a half smile as Lily took his hand in both of hers, her fingers gently caressing his skin.

"I don't remember what it's like not having you love me," she said quietly, "Do you even remember?"  
"Of course I do, get over yourself, Evans," James joked, mirroring what she had said previously, "Well I remember past crushes if that's what you mean."  
"Not just past crushes," Lily replied a little harshly and James flashed her a grin.  
"Sorry, did I detect a hint of jealousy?" he asked, reaching out to play with the fabric of her shirt.

"No," Lily frowned but James wasn't convinced. Chuckling to himself, James grabbed a handful of her T-shirt and pulled her towards him, much to her dislike, rolling her to lie flat underneath him as he leaned over her.

"I had a crush on you the moment I met you," James answered, his eyes half lidded as he smiled down at her, "Although to be quite honest I didn't like it at first."  
"Why not?" Lily asked, enjoying not having to see the colour of his eyes through glass on this rare occasion.

"Well when you're an eleven year old boy, liking a girl is pretty scary," James explained, "Half of your friends will understand how you're feeling and the other half will still tease you because they haven't felt it yet…that, and you were friends with Snivellus."

"Yeah well…not anymore," Lily replied.

"Sorry," James said sadly, "I suppose that was a little insensitive of me."

"Well you were right about him," She said quietly, "I shouldn't miss him." James played with a lock of her hair and kissed the hollow of her throat.

"Well I'm sorry anyway…for the way me and Sirius were when we met you both in the carriage for the first time."

"Should have realised Severus was no good anyway from the way you two went on about Slytherin house." A paused stretched between the two as James continued to play with her hair. Talking about things like this with Lily would always be difficult, he realised this after her outburst over her sister in the garden last night. She needed to realise that it was ok to be upset about these things.

"You can miss him you know," James said softly and Lily met his gaze.

"But I don't want to," she replied, "There's no point crying over people like that." James nodded lowered himself so that their noses were brushing.

"I fell in love with you when Robert Beagle from Slytherin house threw pumpkin juice all over that muggleborn first year and you stood up and punched him in the face for being 'narrow minded about people'," James smirked and Lily chuckled beneath him.

"That's the only time I ever landed myself in detention," She giggled, "It was worth it though."

"What about you then?" James asked, "When did you begin to like me?"  
"I don't know exactly," Lily answered truthfully, "I guess I've just…known it for a long time but suppressed it because it's just the way it's always been. I've always admired the way you stick with your friends like glue no matter what the situation is. I like that a lot about you. And you were very heroic saving Severus from the incident in the shrieking shack even thought I know you've always loathed him."  
"How do you know about that?" James asked, surprised.

"Severus let it slip whilst trying to convince me that you were a nasty piece of work," Lily answered, "He said that you set it up just so you could save him."

"And you didn't believe him?"

"Should I have?"  
"No…it just seems like you would trust him over me," James said quietly, "You always believed I was nothing but a lying, cocky, persistent little toe rag."

"Yes…well…seeing as I took your word over his I think we can establish that I definitely had feelings for you at that point then can't we?" Lily smiled and, before James could answer, she grabbed hold of the neck of his shirt and pulled him down to meet her lips, gently opening and closing their mouths against each other.

"And that proves that I still do," She whispered.

"I think I need a little more convincing," James grinned, "Even if you are ill and totally disgusting."

_**Author's note: Sorry for not posting in ages, loads of work has been brutally thrust upon me by what is known as education Hope you enjoyed the mush! As always please review :) xxx**_


	20. The End

As various witches and wizards cleared the snow outside the Potter's house and her father shoved various loose items of clothing inside the boot of their car, Lily slid her hand inside James' and rested her head against his shoulder.

"I don't want to go home," She sighed, "The thought of listening to Tuney banging on about the Dursley's is going to drive me crazy."

"What if I came with you?" James grinned, "I'm sure she'd love that."

"Oh yes," Lily smirked, "I'm sure she'd love _**two**_ freaks home in time for the New Year…"

"Well I know how she feels," James said, nodding his head in the direction of Rose and Eli who were preoccupied with fashioning shapes out of the snow behind them, "No doubt he'll do something that isn't remotely witty and she'll break out into a fit of that hideous laughter of hers."  
"James!" Lily frowned but as if on cue, Rose let out a loud giggle and James raised a hand as if to say 'I told you so!'.

"Here you are Lily, Sweetheart," came the voice of James' mother as she shoved something hot into Lily's hand, "Drink that; it will make you feel better."  
"Thanks," Lily smiled, trying to ignore its pungent smell and the fact that James was wrinkling his nose next to her.

"Trust me," James' mother insisted, her eyes lingering to the space between Lily and James, widening when seeing their hands entwined, "It will help despite the taste."  
"Urgh that stuff ruined my childhood," James said turning away.

"Well if you hadn't insisted on playing in that river you wouldn't have been such a sickly child, James," his mother argued.

"I wasn't playing _**in**_ the river mum; I was playing _**by**_ it and I just sort of…ended up in it most of the time," James said with one of his cheeky grins that Lily couldn't help but smile at.

"Well then you weren't a sickly child James, you were a disobedient one," James' mother replied before rolling her eyes and heading for the kitchen.

"Did you tell her?" Lily asked, wincing after swallowing her first mouthful.

"That we're together?" James asked, "No, not yet."  
"I could tell," Lily grinned, "She looked like she was going to drop dead seeing my hand in yours."

"Well she thought I was in love with Rose yesterday morning," James smirked and Lily raised an eyebrow forcing James to explain, "I was putting Eli off the scent…anyway, I don't think I'll tell her until you're gone."

"Why?" Lily frowned, "Will she be disappointed?"  
"Oh no," James sighed, "She'd smother you." Grinning in satisfaction, Lily swallowed the rest of her drink without tasting it and let her arm drop to her side.

"And to think," She chuckled, "I never bought you a Christmas present…If only I'd have known…"

"I think you know my response to that," James said, finding her hand again, "But I'm not going to risk being awfully corny."

"Christmas is a time for being awfully corny though," Lily insisted.

"Too bad it was yesterday then isn't it?" James grinned, receiving a thump on the arm from Lily, "Actually I do have something for you."  
"That's not fair!" Lily argued as James produced a red package from his pocket.

"It's nothing big," James insisted, "In fact it would be meaningless if it weren't for last nights events…just don't open it until you're in the car.'

"Oh but…" Lily argued but before she could finish, her father started the car and called to her through the open window.

"It's nothing," James insisted with a smile, handing her the parcel, "I just wanted to give you something as…as an in joke."

"But I haven't got anything for you!" Lily cried.

"Well I didn't exactly go out and buy you anything," James smirked as Lily's father honked the horn.

"Just a second!" Lily called, "I erm…forgot something!"

"What did you-?" James began before Lily gave him a look that seemed to suggest that he should follow her.

"James, come help me find it!" Lily said loudly so as her father wouldn't be suspicious and hurried towards the house and upstairs into the landing where she turned to him outside his bedroom.

"Is your mum downstairs?" Lily asked.

"Yeah I think-"James answered but before she could finish, Lily stood on her tiptoes and caught his mouth with hers. Now understanding, James thread his fingers into her hair and pulled them closer together. Suddenly the guestroom door opened and they both jumped apart to find James' mother carrying a bundle of bed sheets.

"Hi there," she grinned with a smile that was very much like James', "Did you find what you'd forgotten Lily?" Then, with a lingering look, she descended the staircase leaving Lily and James to stare at each other in disbelief before bursting into a fit of laughter.

"Well it was nice catching up with the Potters," Lily's father smiled as the house disappeared behind them, "Perhaps Tuney will come next time."  
"Sure," Lily muttered under her breath, her hand coming to rest on the red parcel in her lap. Squeezing the soft package in her hands, she pulled on the ribbon and untied the bow before gently unwrapping the paper. Gazing upon the red material within the paper, Lily breathed a laugh as the oversized T-shirt James had given her last night lay soft and warm in her lap. Taking the T-shirt out of the parcel and holding it out in front of her, two pieces of paper fell from the folds of the shirt and floated to the floor.

Curious, Lily picked up both sheets of paper, restraining a gasp when she discovered that one sheet was the animated portrait she had found in James' sketch book; the other was a note. Taking the note in her hands, Lily was puzzled to discover the note they had written to each other all those years ago that stated all the faults she had found with James. Confused as to why he had given her this when it consisted of probably the most hideous conversation between the two, Lily turned the note over in her hands to discover a new paragraph in the back in James' handwriting.

_Lily Flower, _

_(Yes, even when you're my girlfriend I still refuse drop those ridiculous pet names)_

_I know we've only been together for quite literally a day but I couldn't let you leave without giving you something to remind you of the first Christmas we spent together (and hopefully not the last if you haven't already gotten sick of me by then). After seeing you in that delightfully large T-shirt, I found that I could not do it justice the way you do, and pass it on to you so you'll know that even on those lazy days when you can't be bothered to dress up, that you still have something to look absolutely gorgeous in ;) Secondly, I want you to have my sketch for those times when your sister puts you down and you feel like you can't possibly do anything right. Hopefully it will remind you of me and make you realise that you have the ability to make at least one person a very very happy James :) Thirdly, I gave you this list so that when the time comes you can remind me to keep the very last promise I made at the bottom._

_I love you_

_The git/toe rag/big headed pig/whatever else you've called me in the past/_

_James_

_Xxx_

With a heart so full it felt like it would explode in her chest, Lily smiled and turned the list on its front again, curious of the last point made on the list. Reading the last few words in James' handwriting, she could not hold back the giggle that escaped her lips, for the last, newly added point on the list was 'Get Lily a better Christmas present next year.'

**Four Years Later**

Smiling to herself, Lily folded the crumpled piece of parchment that had long ago been both a heart felt letter and a horrible conversation between herself and her husband, and placed it back into the bedside drawer. Reclining in her arm chair, she reflected on the conversation she had shared with James over her sister and could not help but feel slightly melancholy over how long ago it had been since she had last seen Tuney; she hadn't even been invited to visit her new born son. Lily had often pondered on what the conversation would amount to if she had decided to turn up on her sister's thoroughly primed doorstep eager for a cup of tea and a cuddle with her new born nephew. Would she be instantly rejected or welcomed with a cold greeting and vague conversation?

"Is this what you meant by a 'Crunchie?'" came the voice of her husband and suddenly Lily felt ten times happier as he approached her with a confused look, "It's in a gold wrapper."  
"Yes!" Lily replied eagerly and took it from him, ripping open the wrapper and taking a large bite, "Oh Merlin, that's good…"

"What is it?" James asked curiously, "I've never had muggle chocolate."  
"Chocolate with honeycomb," Lily answered, her mouth full, "My cravings are driving me wild."  
"Well at least Crunchie's beat macaroni cheese with jam," James grimaced.

"Yeah I regretted that afterwards," Lily winced, patting her rather large baby bump beneath the huge red 'Westgate Winged Horses' T-shirt James had given her on what had been _**their**_ Christmas four years previously.

"Rose and Eli said they'd come visit from France when the baby's born," Lily smiled as James's hand also wandered to the baby bump.

"You think when they have kids they'll inherit Rose's laugh?" James asked and Lily thumped him hard on the arm, "What? It's just a question!"  
"Well I hope our baby doesn't inherit your terrible sense of humour," Lily mumbled.

"You love my sense of humour."  
"Yes, twenty percent of the time when it's actually funny."  
"Shut up, my sense of humour is one of the reasons you're with me," James smirked.

"At least you've acknowledged that it certainly wasn't your looks I married you for," Lily chuckled.

"Oh har har," James grinned, taking her hand in his and squeezing it tightly, "Well I love you anyway, even if you are convinced that I somehow tricked you into marrying me."  
"Who said I didn't want to be married to an unattractive, unfunny man?" Lily smirked, staring into the hazel eyes she couldn't help but find incredibly alluring as she made her remark.

"I seem to recall that you said I was funny twenty percent of the time," James replied, leaning forwards until their mouths were inches apart, "And anyway, _**you**_ kissed _**me**_ in my bedroom the night we got together, so I can't be _**that**_ unattractive." Lily giggled and closed the gap between them, their mouths meeting.

"Let's just hope the baby doesn't look anything like you," she joked.

_**Author's note: THE END! Hope you liked it! Sorry it took me so long to finish. It took a ridiculous amount of time I know, and I probably left you thinking that my last chapter was actually the end, but then that would have left everything open and unfinished, and I like solid endings :) Once again, REVIEW PLEAAAAAASE! Love xxx**_


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